Episode 18 is a wonderful jumping in point for new listeners. It’s the beginning of a new arc and has a lot of exposition that sets up the story. But some prospective listeners might want a bit more information without having to listen to the other episodes.  This is why we wrote up an episode recap. This recap summarizes the show plot up to episode 18.


Tabletop Squadron Recap

*Contains full spoilers*

Word document download: Episode 6 I Have Altered The Deal

PDF download: Episode 6 I Have Altered The Deal

Read in browser:

Episode 6 I Have Altered The Deal

The transcription provided have been created through a mix of software and manual editing. We have tried our best to indicate overlapping speech, cross-party talk, and interruptions. “In character” speech has been italicized as best as possible.


Laura’s character Xianna’fan speaks in somewhat of a French accent.


We apologize for any misspellings or mistakes. Please send any corrections, comments, or concerns to tabletopsquadron@gmail.com





[00:18] NICK: Hi everyone, and welcome to Tabletop Squadron, a Star Wars Edge of the Empire actual play podcast. I’m Nick, your game master. Every other Thursday our story follows a thief, a bounty hunter, a fringer and a slicer as they explore the galaxy, helping a mysterious benefactor and each other.


[SFX: a guitar plays Darth Vader’s theme as Nick speaks]


[00:36} NICK: I just wanted to take a second to thank Molarduck for his very kind iTunes review – only two more to go and we get to release our secret arc; please get out there and review the show!


[00:45] We hope you enjoy the episode.


[00:47] NICK: Hello everybody and welcome to episode six of Tabletop Squadron. I’m your host Nick. I’m gonna go around the table and everybody introduce themself and their character and if you spent any experience since last time please tell the audience what you did – startin’ off with Laura!


[01:04] LAURA: I’m Laura


[01:05] NICK: Hi Laura


[01:06] LAURA: {laughing} I play Xianna, she’s a Twi’lek and I bought another rank in the skill “Underworld”.


[01:14] NICK: ‘Cus you have streetwise.


[01:15] LAURA: Well I already have streetwise, this is underworld. It’s an intelligence skill; streetwise is a cunning-based skill.


[01:21] NICK: Right, of course


[01:21] LAURA: Incase you wanna know how this game works.


[01:23] NICK: Yeah, if you wanna know how the game works look at our Instagram, we have all the rules.


[01:28] LAURA: Tabletop_squad


[01:29] NICK: Yeah, that’s going to be in the outro. And next, uh, Steven!


[01:33] STEVEN: Hello


[01:34] NICK: Hi Steven.


[01:35] STEVEN: Hi, I’m Steven.


[01:36] NICK: Hi


[01:37] STEVEN: Hi. I am playing the Togruta, Sabos, and also doing what I can to make Nick’s life harder.


[01:44] NICK: Of course you are, great. And have you spent any experience?


[01:47] STEVEN: Oh yes, yes I did. See this is the part of the making it harder I was talking about. I upgraded my survival which is a cunning skill to two.


[01:55] NICK: Ooh, smart.


[01:56] STEVEN: No, survival.


[01:57] {ALL LAUGH}


[02:00] NICK: Aaand next up we got Hudson!


[02:02] HUDSON: Hi, I’m Hudson. It’s great to be here, Nick.


[02:05] NICK: Great, good to have ya.


[02:07: HUDSON: I’m playing a Gigoran named Tink. I did not use any of my experience points, opting to horde them.


[02:13] {ALL LAUGH}


[02:13] ??: Haudoll – what?


[02:14] LAURA?: Like some sort of fluffy dragon.


[02:17] HUDSON: Yes.


[02:18] NICK: Great. And last up but not least we have Cameron.


[02:22] CAMERON: Hello.


[02:23] NICK: Hi.


[02:24] CAMERON: I’m Cameron. I’m playing Karma, she’s a Nautolan bounty hunter and I upgraded my cool skill to rank two.


[02:33] NICK: Nifty keen. Alright, let’s go ahead and do the destiny roll!


[02:40] STEVEN: Sure, why not


[02:41] {DICE ROLLING}


[02:42] NICK: {GASPS} Nooo!


[02:43] STEVEN: Going good so far, one dark side.


[02:45] {DICE ROLLING}


[02:46] STEVEN: Okay, another dark side.


[02:47] LAURA: Oh, come on!


[02:50] CAMERON: Another dark side


[02:50] STEVEN: Another dark side


[02:51] NICK: Oh my


[02:50] HUDSON: Going to need to save y’all here.


[02:50] {DICE ROLLING}


[02:51] STEVEN: And another dark side! We did great.


[02:54] NICK: Yees, excellent.


[02:55] LAURA: These dice didn’t listen to us. We tried to get the bad rolls out and then we primed the dice-


[03:00] CAMERON: It didn’t work.


[03:01] LAURA: – by putting the two light side up to encourage it and let it know what we expected out of it.


[03:05] CAMERON: I don’t think it-


[03:06] NICK: How’d that work out for you?


[03:07] CAMERON & LAURA: Not well.


[03:09] STEVEN: We have lots of dark side.


[03:10] CAMERON: None of us rolled two dark sides.


[03:11] NICK: Well, there you go.


[03:13] CAMERON: So…


[03:13] NICK: Mediocrity. Wonderful.


[03:14] CAMERON: Hey, maybe we got-


[03:15] STEVEN: I mean we did pretty good at failing, just not as good as we could have.


[03:19] NICK: Hmm. Great. Great. I’ll uh, be happy to use those this session.


[03:22] CAMERON: Great.


[03:24] STEVEN: I’m sure it’ll go well.


[03:24] NICK: I’m sure it’ll come up. Though, if you remember, last time we went on an adventure into the jungle, little bit of a man hunt. You got into a gunfight with Leera and Williams, the officer and the…


[03:38] LAURA: Trooper.


[03:39] NICK: Trooper. Stormtrooper, that’s what she’s called. And you murdered Leera by having a tree eat her, proving that Mills was not crazy and the trees actually are alive and extremely dangerous, and you opted to let Williams go and fake his death without Mills noticing and you loaded a corpse into the back of your speeder and you are headed back to the outpost. So, we’ll pick up there. Ummm-


[04:07] HUDSON: What model of speeder?


[04:10] NICK: It’s a big one.


[04:11] STEVEN: Good.


[04:12] NICK: A six-seater with offroad skids.


[04:14] HUDSON: Save the model T4 made the people wanna go, wanna get, wanna get, wanna get up and go!


[04:18] LAURA: NO!


[04:19] {ALL LAUGH}


[04:21] STEVEN: I’m liking where this is going.


[04:23] NICK: Uhhh, alright! So we open on a jungle treetop with a reddening late afternoon sun overhead. You hear the drone of a single speeder beneath the trees. One of the trees groans and begins to lean but another tree whips its branches around, tangling with the trunk. The trees snap at each other. There’s the sound of a blaster rifle being fired. Bolts blast up through the trees which stop moving and some strange monkey creatures with lobster tails go skidding along the canopy. Our viewpoint drops through the trees into the dim jungle. A speeder is whipping through the undergrowth, dodging fallen logs and undergrowth. Occasionally the elevation changes and the speeder lurches upwards on the metal skids which cover the bottom, designed for just that purpose. Inside the speeder we see our heroes with Mills, their companion. The speeder roars past the camera and from the rear we see a large crate affixed to the back. The speeder hits a bump and a bloody arm in Stormtrooper gear falls out of the trunk, swaying back and forth in the momentum of travel. So, you are driving back.


[05:21] LAURA: Did we pick up Spark Duelson when he died or did we just leave him laying there?


[05:27] NICK: That’s a good question, you never really mentioned it.


[05:28] LAURA: I don’t remember. I looted his body-


[05:31] NICK: Mmhmm.


[05:31] LAURA: – behind the speeder.


[05:34] CAMERON: I’m going to say I tossed him up on the back of the speeder.


[05:37] NICK: Okay, so is he just like Weekend at Bernie’s in the back seat right now?


[05:37] LAURA: I would not have.


[05:40] CAMERON: Yeah. I felt, I just, felt bad, I mean I’m sure he has a mom somewhere who’s worried about him and this is really going to hit her hard that her son was both a failure in the Empire and is now dead.


[05:51] NICK: Mmhmm.


[05:53] CAMERON: So… ya know.


[05:54] NICK: So, who’s in – I know Tink is driving, we settled that last time. Mills is in the seat next to him and then who’s stuck in the back seat with the corpse?


[05:57] CAMERON: Sabos.


[05:58] LAURA: Yeah.


[06:01] STEVEN: He’s touching my my forehead tail!


[06:03] {LAUGHTER}


[06:04] LAURA: In case you haven’t noticed, Xianna likes to call things and she almost certainly saw Karma putting the body into the back seat and was immediately like “Middle seat! I call middle seat! I do not want to seat with the dead body.


[06:20] STEVEN: I don’t want to either…


[06:22] LAURA: Yes, but you see I called it first, so… that is how that works.


[06:26] NICK: Those are the rules. Mills slots his blaster rifle into the little cubby under the dashboard and you all have those big helicopter earphones on with the like wrap-around microphones so you can talk to each other over the noise of the speeder. He says, “Well, that was interesting. I’m glad ya got to see what the plant life of this planet can really do.


[06:46] CAMERON: Do any of us have ears? Like real ears that can – are these made for human ears because like I have ear cones so they probably would stick out on the ear cones and thinking about it, no one knows if Togrutas and Nautolans have actual ears or what, and he’s just fur so like I’m sure he has ears somewhere in there.


[07:09] HUDSON: They’re buried in there through.


[07:10] LAURA: He probably knows where they are though so if he was putting on a headset he just like smooshes them in, just like sways them side to side.


[07:14] HUDSON: He just has – he just has them strapped to his nipples in the front. That’s where Gigorans hear from.


[07:19] CAMERON: I don’t-


[07:20] NICK: Not quite.


[07:20] LAURA: I’m sure they’re on its head and he just has to, like-


[07:23] HUDSON: Yeah I just have to like,


[07:24] LAURA: – circle them around to get the hair out of the way but the rest of us are probably having them like awkwardly positioned around tentacles and ear cones to try and make them fit.


[07:25] CAMERON: ‘Cus I don’t, so, I have a comm link and I have like, I have one of the ear ones that’s hidden so it’s not like on my wrist but it’s just somewhere up in my tentacles where – with whatever the ear is. So I probably have like a couple of tentacles in front of them and a couple behind them and they’re weirdly far back on my head.


[07:55] NICK: This is great, so everyone’s wearing their earphones just kinda like at a weird angle.


[08:01] CAMERON: Yeah.


[08:02] STEVEN: It makes my first and fourth head tail more prominent ‘cause it pushes it up.


[08:05] CAMERON: What, how do yours work ‘cause you have some head tails on top?


[08:06] LAURA: Let’s not wear your-


[08:08] STEVEN: Yeah I don’t know {laughs}


[08:09] LAURA: I don’t think he understands how the head tails work!


[08:11] CAMERON: You have them like, there’s like, to go in between the two pointy bits-


[08:14] STEVEN: Yeah, it’s-


[08:15] CAMERON: – {laughing} so you have like one on your nose and one on the back of your head…


[08:18] STEVEN: Yeah, it’s tough.


[08:19] LAURA: No it’s probably like, angled so that the band that connects them is like-


[08:23] STEVEN: Is on my forehead.


[08:24] LAURA: – is on the forehead?


[08:24] STEVEN: Yeah.


[08:24] CAMERON: Or like he’s one of these super cool who has the band, like, below his chin-


[08:25] LAURA: Oh he has them below?


[08:29] CAMERON: And it’s like a beard of-


[08:30] STEVEN: Is special headphone just cut outs, or?


[08:33] CAMERON: No, we’re – we’re –


[08:34] NICK: These are just standard-


[08:35] CAMERON: – we’re at an Empire outpost, they don’t particularly like aliens. None of these were made for anyone with-


[08:39] NICK: They’re definitely designed for humans.


[08:41] STEVEN: {“Oh well” NOISES}


[08:43] NICK: So do you guys have anything you wanna debrief about while you’re on the speeder back?


[08:46] CAMERON: I’m leaning against the wall of the speeder with my head in my hand breathing deeply. I don’t look too good.


[08:52] NICK: Yeah, you got shot a whole bunch last episode.


[08:56] CAMERON: Yeah.


[08:57] NICK: Yeah, so there’s-


[08:58] CAMERON: I’m looking a little green.


[08:59] NICK: Aahhhahahaha {OTHERS LAUGH} There’s probably-


[09:01] CAMERON: But it’s because I’m a Nautolan and not because I’m sick.


[09:03] NICK: – some char marks going down the side of the inside of the speeder from rubbing off the massive wounds that you have.


[09:11] CAMERON: Both in the back I think. I think I got shot in the back twice.


[09:15] NICK: Yeah.


[09:16] CAMERON: Yup, so I’m kind of leaning away from the back of the seat, too, so I’m not leaning against the wounds. I don’t look particularly chatty at the moment.


[09:24] LAURA: I do look at Sabos and go “You owe me four stim packs.”


[09:28] STEVEN: I’ll get right on that.


[09:30] LAURA: “I healed you, you should owe me.”


[09:33] STEVEN: I don’t disagree, I shuffle through my bag looking at my inventory. It does not include any stim packs.


[09:41] LAURA: “Then buy them.”


[09:42] STEVEN: We’re not at a store right now


[09:44] LAURA: “We will be!”


[09:45] STEVEN: Noted.


[09:46] LAURA: “That is why I said you owe me. Future tense.”


[09:50] HUDSON: “Sabos, I think she, I think she wants you to get some stim packs for her.”


[09:50] STEVEN: “I will. I will get some stim packs as soon as I get enough credits to buy the stim packs.”


[09:57] CAMERON: Y’all sound like my kids.


[10:00] {LAUGHTER}


[10:01] NICK: We’ll use that as the transition. So, the speeder goes whipping off through the trees and we have a swipe cut, the speeder goes right to left on the screen and the transition swipes with the speeder to reveal the clearing for Outpost 4! As you pull into the clearing you see that there are three Stormtroopers posted outside of the Afternoon Delight, your starwin pleasure yacht. While they are obviously on guard duty they don’t react as you burst out of the final growths of the jungle and into the clearing around the outpost. There are two more Scout Troopers by the main gate which is still open and they wave you through without incident after a hand signal from Mills. He has taken off his bandanna and is using it to wipe the camouflage paint from his face. He says, “Park us in the square. I’ll take the body to the morgue and you go report to Falx.”


[10:48] CAMERON: “Bodies.”


[10:50] NICK: “Oh, right. Sparks. Yeah, yeah okay. I’ll take the bodies to the morgue.”


[10:55] CAMERON: “Thank you.”


[10:58] NICK: So the speeder, Tink, I guess you set it down in the square in the middle of the outpost?


[11:01] HUDSON: Yeah. Throw the keys in.


[11:04] NICK: Okay. Mills immediately piles out and detaches the big crate that’s on the back and just starts dragging that off to the side and then remembers Sparks and goes back and goes “Well, that’s the third one this month.” and just grabs the guy and starts dragging him towards a, it looks like a low-slung building off towards one of the barrier walls. You hear him mumbling about having to make multiple trips, he doesn’t seem particularly enthused.


[11:30] CAMERON: “I’m not surprised they don’t last long if that’s the level, like the of caliber people they’re at.”


[11:36] LAURA: “Only three a month?” I’m trying to get out of the speeder. “That seems low.”


[11:42] STEVEN?: “Have you seen those trees?”


[11:42] HUDSON: “Karma, do you need some help getting out of there?”


[11:43] LAURA: “Like, yeah, those trees?”


[11:45] CAMERON: “Yes please.”


[11:47] HUDSON: I picked up Karma.


[11:48] NICK: You just pick her up?


[11:49] HUDSON: Yeah I pick her up to bring her uh, wherever we’re going.


[11:52] STEVEN: Her blood soaking into your fur, staining it forever.


[11:55] HUDSON: Not forever, I have Space Tide.


[11:57] {LAUGHTER}


[11:59] LAURA: He’s got some space bleach.


[12:01] NICK: He’s got a Tide, a Tide pen that’s a laser.


[12:04] HUDSON: In the future Tide pods are actually edible.


[12:06] {ALL LAUGH}


[12:08] CAMERON: Oh no.


[12:09] NICK: Okay, you head towards the mansion, I guess?


[12:13] HUDSON: Yeah, we head towards the mansion to report back.


[12:15] LAURA: Before we go in, Xianna does look at Sabos and Tink and points at both of them and is like “Neither of you two talk. Be quiet. Be seen, but not heard!”


[12:30] HUDSON: “What did I do?”


[12:31] LAURA: “You two are bad at the talking!”


[12:35] HUDSON: “What!”


[12:36] STEVEN: I’m a really good driver.


[12.37] LAURA: “Sure. Sure you are. But the talking you are not good at. Please, let me talk – and maybe Karma. If she can talk.”


[12:46] STEVEN: “So should we maybe not mention how we got the-”


[12:48] LAURA: “No. Do not talk. Do not say anything. Look pretty, okay?”


[12:53] HUDSON: “She can’t talk because she’s bleeding to death in my arms! I should be able to talk because I’m fine.”


[12:57] LAURA: “No. No no no no. Just be pretty. Do not talk. Okay?”

[13:02] HUDSON: “I’m covered in blood. I will neither be pretty, nor will I refuse to talk!”


[13:07] CAMERON: “I don’t look very pretty right now either, Tink, it’s alright.”


[13:10] NICK: And with that we’ll cut to the next thing. There is a… star wipe. Why not? We’ll do a star wipe and it cuts to the group standing in a well-appointed office. It’s all fur and dark wood and Falx is leaning back in a chair behind a large desk with his feet up. He’s wearing a black imperial uniform which seems to have been tailored to make him look athletic and imposing. He takes a sip from a martini glass and gestures for you to speak


[13:39] STEVEN: “Falx!”


[13:40] NICK: “Well hi! It seems like you’ve made it to- Woah! What happened to your fishy friend?”


[13:44] LAURA: “Oh, do not worry about her. She will be fine.”


[13:47] NICK: “I could, uh, call for a medic or something?”


[13:50] CAMERON: “Yes. Yes please. Yes please”


[13:52] LAURA: “That would be good. Thank you.”


[13:54] CAMERON: “Do that.”


[13:55] NICK: Alright, so he reached under the desk and presses something and a little while later you see someone in a, it looks like an officer’s uniform but it’s all white and has a little like red cross on it, and that person says “Lean the, lean the patient over here please, put her down in this chair, I’ll see what I can do.” And so there’s a chair and he folds the back down so there’s more of a stool, and as Karma sits on it he starts to take out bacta and peel back the armour and probably helps you out of the outer layer and starts stitching you up and doing random medical things.


[14:24] CAMERON: Fun.


[14:25] NICK: Okay so can somebody make me a check with three greens and a yellow please?


[14:31] CAMERON: What difficulty?


[14:33] NICK: Just a simple check. This is for the medic. Medic checks are simple.


[14:37] {DICE NOISES}


[14:40] CAMERON: Four successes, two advantages.


[14:44] NICK: Great, so you’re going to get four health back and then he also uses a bunch of bacta on you so you get an additional ten health back because bacta packs are awesome!


[14:53] CAMERON: Aw yeah.


[14:54] NICK: So you should be back to full but that’s gonna be over the course of the scene, you’ll be under medical attention for the whole time.


[14:59] CAMERON: Okay.


[14:59] NICK: Like you hear the medic kinda mumbling to himself as he sees under the armour about how much he’s having to use all this bacta and who knows when the next shipment will be and he starts stitching. It hurts, but this has happened before.


[15:12] CAMERON: Yeah.


[15:13] NICK: You’re pretty used to this.


[15:14] CAMERON: No biggie. It’s better if you don’t move.


[15:15] NICK: So Falx kicks his feet back up onto the desk and takes a sip of his martini and says “So! It appears that you met some resistance. What happened?”


[15:24] LAURA: “Well-”


[15:24] HUDSON: “Did you know the trees move?”


[15:27] NICK: “Oh, yeah, unfortunate feature of our lovely home on Unroola Dawn. I probably shoulda told you about that before time.”


[15:34] LAURA: “Well… yes. Umm… but, the people we were sent to obtain, they fought back a little bit and they are both…. Dead.”


[15:46] NICK: “Ooooh wow. Okay. I was-”


[15:48] LAURA: “One of the bodies was together enough to bring back, the other one just some… little bits.”


[15:55] NICK: “Did you bring the little bits?”


[15:58] LAURA: “I think so.”


[15:08] CAMERON: I feel like Karma has them in her pack.


[16:01] NICK: Okay. Do you show them?


[16:03] LAURA: I’m pretty we got the hat?


[16:06] CAMERON: We got the hat and his bloody uniform and, yeah.


[16:08] LAURA: And his insignia – his rank insignia.


[16:13] STEVEN: The tree claimed most of the little bits.


[16:15] CAMERON: I try not to move and I just I pull a pouch that has them in it and just like gently toss it to Xianna ‘cause I’m being stitched.


[16:23] LAURA: Xianna kinda like pulls back, is like “Ew!”


[16:25] CAMERON: “It’s on a pouch.”


[16:27] LAURA: Still she’s like “ew” and picks up with two little fingers and like puts it on his desk and is like “I threw a grenade… sorry.”


[16:35] NICK: Falx opens the bag and very nonchalantly pulls out the bloody scraps of fabric-


[16:40] HUDSON: “Ew! Gross!”


[16:41] NICK: – and puts it back in the bag.


[16:43] LAURA: “I know.”


[16:45] NICK: “I’ll have to ask Sparks about exactly what happened. Where is he?”


[16:47] LAURA: “Oh, by the way… uh…. Sparks is also…. Dead. One of those weird furball scorpion crab thingies got him while we were being attacked by the trees.


[17:01] STEVEN: “Ah, tasty creatures but fiesty.”


[17:03] NICK: “Yeah, I – I, wow. Racked up quite a body count on this pretty simple job.”


[17:10] LAURA: “We were not aware the trees were murderous.”


[17:14] CAMERON: “Your five Troopers are dead too.”


[17:15] NICK: “Yeah I guess… that’s why I sent you all.”


[17:17] LAURA: “Mills also seemed to have some sort of war flashback and ran off into the trees for a bit.”


[17:23] NICK: “Haha! Oh that Mills, such a card. He was probably testing you. He does that to me from time to time.” The camera cuts to Mills in the morgue and he’s just dumping Sparks’ body in what looks like – it’s like a freezer container but it looks kinda like a dumpster and one of the legs is sticking out at a weird angle and he’s just “Man, someday I’ll have to stop doing this.” And he’s, like, hitting it down with a broom to try to get it into the freezer. And the camera cuts back to you all.


[17:52] HUDSON: Wooooow…


[17:53] LAURA: I’m glad none of our characters saw that.


[17:55] NICK: “So, there’s no one to collaborate your story?”


[17:59] LAURA: “Mills was there when I accidentally blew up Williams, so… He also saw Leera get murdered by the tree.”


[18:07] HUDSON: “Did you say collaborate the story or corro-”


[18:10] NICK: “Corroborate the story.”


[18:12] HUDSON: Ah.


[18:13] HUDSON: Corrob- Ahh.


[18:13] NICK: Corroborate.


[18:14] {ALL LAUGH}


[18:15] NICK: “Ah, Tink, you finally speak!”


[18:16] LAURA: And she’s like poking Tink and she’s like “Nooooooooo.”


[18:21] HUDSON: I glare.


[18:21] NICK: “I thought from all the bloodstains that maybe you’d been wounded!”


[18:24] HUDSON: “Oh no, just carrying Karma.”


[18:27] NICK: “Ahh- ohh. Right. Well I’m glad you all made it back. I kind of send you on a suicide mission and then right after you left I felt sorta bad, which is weird for me!”


[18:38] LAURA: “Umm… Thank you?”


[18:41] STEVEN: “Yeah, uh… we’ll just take the payment?”


[18:45] NICK: “Right. Yeah we can… probably make that happen. So, just to recap: the officer I trusted died beforehand, and the two people I sent you to get died, and one of them you brought back a hat and Mills, who honestly is not the most reliable of fellas, will have to answer this later. But did I miss anything?”


[19:06] CAMERON: “Ummm… was-”


[19:07] LAURA: “Wait, was Duelson was a trusted officer? I thought he was like, a private he was, like, so young.”.


[19:15] NICK: “By trusted I mean he was too scared of me to lie to me.”


[19:19] LAURA: “Oh! I understand now.”


[19:21] NICK: “I don’t know if you could tell, but he was my snitch, my patsy, the one to tell me what was goin on.”


[19:26] LAURA: “Oh no! It is never good when you lose your snitch.”


[19:31] CAMERON: Karma thinks back on all the information that Spark Duelson told us before he died about secret codes and leaving the base and everything and is like yeah I could see how he’d be a good snitch – but says it silently to herself.


[19:42] NICK: So I’m gonna need a deception check, probably from Xianna and one other person-


[19:49] LAURA: Can do.


[19:50] NICK: Or Tink or Karma can help ‘cause you two are the ones that talked the most.


[19:55] STEVEN: That’s good because I don’t deceive.


[19:57] LAURA: Do you have any deception?


[19:58] HUSDON: No.

[19:58] LAURA: Okay.


[19:59] HUDSON: I have none.


[20:00] LAURA: What’s the difficulty?


[20:01] NICK: It’s gonna be three purple.


[20:03] CAMERON: Are we both making checks, or am I helping Xianna?


[20:05] NICK: It’s an assistance.


[20:06] CAMERON: Okay. Take a blue ‘cause-


[20:07] NICK: It’s a blue.


[20:08] CAMERON: – you’re better at deception than me, so.


[20:10] HUDSON: Everything I said was a hundred percent true – weird monkeys, weird trees.


[20:17] LAURA: Three successes.


[20:18] NICK: Alright, he uh, thinks for a minute and scratches at one of his head spikes and says “Well! Sounds pretty trustworthy to me! Glad you made it back in once piece.”


[20:28] HUDSON: “Are you?”


[20:30] NICK: “Yeah, I think we’re friends.”


[20:33] LAURA: “Yes, yes we are.” And Xianna smiles.


[20:35] CAMERON: Karma gives a pained look as something happens to her back.


[20:40] SIMON: You got shot a lot.


[20:41] NICK: Yeah, the medic kinda tugs on one of your head tentacles-


[20:44] CAMERON: {Pained hissing noise}


[20:44] NICK: “Stand still. Or sit still.”


[20:46] CAMERON: “I’m sitting.”


[20:47] NICK: He’s, he’s got a lot of blood probably like up to his elbow as he’s digging around in there.


[20:52] CAMERON: “And I’m not moving, you’re wiggling.”


[20:54] NICK: “Look, I can make this – we can do this the easy way or the hard way, either way it’s gonna hurt” and you flinch again as he digs deeper in there. You’re not sure why he’s digging in there because it wasn’t bullets so there’s nothing in there to dig out but, uh-


[21:09] LAURA: Tree bark.


[21:10] NICK: Could be. He’s making sure it’s not infected. With his hands.


[21:12] HUDSON: Aren’t there weird tree spores n’ shit?


[21:16] NICK: Yes. There are.


[21.16] CAMERON: Yes, that’s true. He’s disinfecting.


[21:19] NICK: Oh, speaking of the weird tree spores, in the office you notice one of those like humming heat lamp things that they use for it is hanging from the ceiling and you didn’t notice it at first because it was behind like a light fixture but it’s the same kinda technology, so, it’s the kinda thing where Falx, in his home setup would be able to basically be decontaminated constantly, all the time.


[21:40] NICK: “Well, this would be a well-executed mission except for a couple of small things.” And he presses a button under his desk and you see the pudgey quartermaster walk in and Falx says “Why don’t you tell my good friends what you told me, Quartermaster?” and the pudgy quartermaster goes “Okay, so, I was thinking back about these transactions that these people made with me and realised I recognise that Togruta,” and he points at Sabos “when I was the quartermaster at Outpost 2, he’s the one who came in and tried to make some trade agreement for his little colony.”


[22:18] STEVEN: “Not little. Well, I mean smaller than- Okay fine.”


[22:22] LAURA: The moment he starts talking Xianna immediately sighs because in her head it’s like “you always deny everything! You stay silent, you deny, you ask for a lawyer.”


[22:33] HUDSON: “You mean Osaron?”


[22:36] NICK: “Yeah, that’s the stupid place. Look, he said they were going to trade exotic goods for basic supplies and we sent a good faith payment, and he never sent anything back. It happens from time to time, and then that idiot came back!”


[22:52] STEVEN: “I assure you, I did send my side of the deal back. I sent one of my best pilots.”


[22:57] HUDSON: Roll deception?


[22:58] NICK: Yeah.


[22:59] CAMERON: Well did, did you actually?


[23:01] STEVEN: No.


[23:04] STEVEN: I, I don’t have anything at all.


[23:10] LAURA: And at this moment Xianna’s like leaning over to Karma and whispers to her “Wait, is he actually a con artist? That would make so much more sense.”


[23:20] STEVEN: How hard is it?


[23:21] NICK: Three purple.


[23:22] HUDSON: Haaaaa!


[23:23] CAMERON: Karma whispers back “He’d be better at lying.”


[23:24] NICK: Also two black die because he’s already done a bunch of research on this ahead of time.


[23:30] STEVEN: Sure.


[23:31] HUDSON: If you pass this check I’ll like, get nekkid and do cartwheels.


[23:34] NICK: Oh, and wouldn’t it be cool if you had some light side points to flip, which you don’t. So let’s go ahead and flip a dark side point.


[23:40] STEVEN: Damnit this isn’t streetwise or knowledge, that sucks. {HUDSON LAUGHING} Uhhhhhhh… uhhhhhhhhhh…


[23:47] LAURA: Oh, that is a sad, sad roll.


[23:48] STEVEN: ‘Kay, this is fine.


[23:50] LAURA: Oh no. Three greens, two black, two purple and one red.


[23:55] HUDSON: Three purples or-


[23:56] LAURA: No, two purples ‘cause I upgraded.


[23:57] HUDSON: Oh, two.


[23:58] STEVEN: Okay this is cool.


[23:59] {SHAKING DICE}


[24:00] STEVEN: “I totally sent your shipment with one of my best pilots.”


[24:04] {ROLLING DICE}


[24:06] STEVEN: Okay, so there’s a lot of advantages-


[24:08] CAMERON: You did not….


[24:08] STEVEN: – but I did end up failing a couple times. So uh, I have two failures and an advantage?


[24:14] CAMERON: Two advantages.


[24:15] STEVEN: Two failures, two advantages.


[24:16] NICK: Okay. Uhhh…


[24:17] STEVEN: “Uhh, I’m lying! He was actually not one of my best pilots.”




[24:22] NICK: Yeah, so… be thinking about how you want to spend those advantages. And it’s not that you can make people believe you. Falx’s Smile gets real wide and he says “That’ll be all, Quartermaster,” and the guy goes “{sigh} thanks for using my lunch break.” and wanders out. And Falx says “So, obviously quite a bit of money! Standard support package, that’s about a hundred thousand credits.


[24:45] LAURA: “What!” Xianna previously like, had her like elbow on an armchair, like, forehead in her hand just like sighing down and then immediately goes like “Why did you do that!”


[24:58] CAMERON: Karma hisses again.


[24:59] STEVEN: “Let’s just say I was – I was busy executing other trade deals and uh, well I haven’t yet come up with my side. As soon as I get back to Osaron I promise I’ll do it, wh- what type of thing would you be interested in?”


[25:16] NICK: “We’ll deal with that here in a second. There’s going to be an easier way to repay you debt.


[25:19] STEVEN: “Oh. I’m happy.”


[25:22] NICK: “But before that -” he pressed something under his desk and you see a holo camera pop up, and he presses a button. There’s the little dialing tone which is like a little spinning imperial gear logo, and then a hologram of a guy’s torso, facing towards Falx, shows up. And you can see a reflection in the window behind him so you can so you can see the whole guy and it is a large gentleman with a little bit of a paunch, wearing a black imperial uniform very similar to Falx’s and he’s got bushy hair and really big mutton chops that also look like his hair – so he has kinda like Whoville looking hair if it was combed down and then big mutton chops, and then he has a big eyepatch that takes up about a quarter of his face. And Falx says “Ah yes, Regional Governor Silpin. I remember you sent me a missive a while ago. Could you explain to me again about that robbery last year? I may have found a lead for you.


[26:16] LAURA: “Oh shit!”


[26:17] NICK: And uh, Silpin starts talking and he has a low but kind of whiny voice, and he says, “Well, you know that we had this problem a while ago with some sort of Twi’lek con artist thief, and she came in and she seduced me, and she stole a whole bunch of documents that should not ever see the light of the sun, and then she stole all my wife’s jewellery – she almost left me because of that! I had to spend so much money to get it back, and it was a purple Twi’lek, and I don’t remember her name, but it was pretty bad, she wore this big coat and she was real pretty and look what happened to me now; I used to be stationed somewhere nice, and now I’m here on Unroola Dawn because of the embarrassment. You know all of this, I’m sure you’re just trying to make fun of me but if you do have any information I will kill the heck out of that person and have them tortured for a very long time. I’ve been developing torture droids specifically for this.”


[27:13] NICK: And Falx says “Tell you what, I’m going to dig into that a little more and get back to you.” And he slides the camera back down into its compartment.


[27:18] LAURA: The moment he puts it down Xianna like holds a finger up and is like “Okay, in my defense the wife gave me most of the jewellery. I don’t think he wants to know that I was also seducing her.”


[27:31] NICK: “In the long run that may be a little irrelevant.”


[27:34] LAURA: “It may actually make things worse now that I think about it. He might not appreciate that fact.”


[27:40] NICK: So, Falx pulls a few tumblers up from under his desk. His desk is pretty much clear but for some reason all the storage seems to be just under it, and he pulls some tumblers out and pulls a decanter of blue clear fluid and pours, just in a circle, it spills on the desk a little bit as he fills up the glasses, he kinda taps them towards y’all. Karma, at this point the medic kinda slaps on your back and it doesn’t hurt, because of all the bacta it’s pretty numb and cold; it kinda feels like when you put that aloe gel in a sunburn where it’s like cold and a little stingy but mostly numb.


[27:11] CAMERON: Mmm, nice.


[28:12] NICK: And the medic says “That’s the best I can do.” And he walks out of the room and you realise that his face never changed at all during that process, like he’s very practised at not listening or at least not reacting to these things. And he’s gone, and you can put your armour back on. And Falx says, “You might as well have a drink because we have a lot to talk about.”


[28:32] STEVEN: I like your style, Falx.”


[28:34] NICK: “That’s great. I don’t particularly like yours, you don’t seem to be very good at this.”


[28:39] STEVEN: “Well, I’m doing the best I can for my small little colony.”


[28:43] LAURA: While this is happening Xianna takes a glass for her, and then takes one and hands it to Karma and like, shoves it into her hand, and has to like pull her hand up into the glass to hold it.


[28:55] STEVEN: Oh I’ll take the, I just grab the drink off the desk pretty immediately.


[29:00] HUDSON: I take the drink off the desk.


[29:01] CAMERON: Karma leans back into the armchair. Keeps on holding the drink, but doesn’t drink it.


[29:07] NICK: Okay. If you take a sip of it, it’s like teeth-hurtingly sweet and you can’t taste alcohol in it at all, but your vision lags slightly, like it’s very, very, very strong.


[29:20] HUDSON: So I pour a little bit of it onto the blood on my fur and rub it around to see if it gets the blood out.


[29:25] NICK: It turns purple, because of the red-brownish blood it turns this weird purple sludgy kind of colour and just kind of stains you like Teletubby.


[29:33] HUDSON: Can I get a towel?


[29:35] NICK: Falx shakes his head to himself and says “Loveable scamp!” and he claps and the protocol droid from the night before waddles out with like a really nice napkin like before and says “Oh, you rang?” and Falus says, “Give him the napkin!” and the droid whose face doesn’t move still manages to look mortified and hands it over and hang his head and then waddles out of the room.


[29:58] HUDSON: I wipe the blood off and thank Falx.


[30:01] STEVEN: I see him do that so I dip my headtail in the glass to, just to see what happens.


[30:06] NICK: Umm, it’s like dipping your forehead in windex, it’s blue and drippy.


[30:11] STEVEN: Yeaahh.


[30:13] CAMERON: Whyyyyy


[30:14] LAURA: The moment they are doing this Xianna just looks down into her glass and and then just downs the whole thing.


[30:18] NICK: It’s good. It is very good, it is extremely strong. You’ve had it before – what is it called?


[30:26] LAURA: Ooooh! Okay, so it’s –


[30:27] CAMERON: You said it’s blue?


[30:28] LAURA: -it’s blue-


[30:29] NICK: It’s blue and clear.


[30:30] LAURA: And it’s strong, hmm….


[30:32] STEVEN: It’s not the star thing, is it?


[30:33] ALL: No


[30:34] LAURA: A Naboo Sky.


[30: 36] NICK: A Naboo Sky. ‘Cause yea, Falx is the kind of guy who keeps named mixed drinks in a decanter, that makes sense.


[30:42] CAMERON: Yeah.


[30:44] LAURA: Well because he’s got a Thermos with martinis in it.


[30:45] CAMERON: They’re the kind of alcohol mixed drinks that are all alcohol-


[30:50] NICK: Mhm


[30:51] CAMERON: So you can just keep it in a decanter.


[30:55] {ALL AGREE}


[30:55] NICK: So, you have a Naboo Sky, you know that these things are like, if you wanna get super drunk you have one, and he just poured out quite a bit. And he finished his martini, pours some of the blue drink into it and has a sip of that. He says, “So, obviously the deal has changed. It’s a pretty strange coincidence that you all are here, but at the same time the galaxy seems to work in mysterious ways. I could have you killed; I could have you detained. That doesn’t really serve my purposes. So, here’s what we’re gonna do.” he points to a large crate by the doorway with a briefcase on top of it. You didn’t really notice it on the way in. “That large crate contains the Stonebreaker. Take it. Do whatever you need with it, I wouldn’t be able to sell it anyway. I’m sure Sentinel will get in touch with you pretty soon after you’re out of here. Here’s the catch: before you do whatever you’re supposed to do with him, I need you to deliver my briefcase to some of my business associates.” He reaches under the table and pulls out like a small datapad and slides it on the desk to where you can reach it pretty easily. “The coordinates are on here. You make this payment for me, and do it quickly, and I’ll ignore some of these other coincidences that has popped up. You delay my delivery, force me to get involved with the people that want that briefcase, and I call back Regional Governor Silpin, give him all the knowledge I have, and tack on the money that this Togruta owes the Empire to help him finance a taskforce. He’s a boring man, but tenacious. I’m sure you know all about that.” and he winks at Xianna.


[32:21] LAURA: Xianna is like “Hm. Very boring. Yes.”


[32:25] NICK: “I’ll give you a head start, but it would be inconvenient, maybe fatal, for you all to rebel. He leans back in his chair.


[32:33] LAURA: Xianna like is nodding, takes the datapad, is like “I understand. We will do your briefcase delivery fast. ASAP.”


[32:41] STEVEN: What’s in the briefcase?


[32:43] NICK: “I wouldn’t worry about that.”


[32:45] CAMERON: Karma’s now worried about it.


[32:47] LAURA: Xianna’s fine because it’s a briefcase, so there’s probably no people inside of it.


[32:51] CAMERON: That’s why Karma’s worried.


[32:53] HUDSON: “Just to make sure we don’t know these business partners, who are the business partners?”


[32:58] NICK: “Oh, it’s just a small crime syndicate from the outer rim. Some people who’ve done some runs for me in the past. You know, what comes around goes around.”


[33:08] LAURA: “The briefcase it does not have volatile materials does it? Should it not be near an open flame? Should we not move it around too much?”


[33:17] NICK: Well you may notice it’s pretty nice Bantha leather, I’d prefer you didn’t burn up the briefcase. You could use that again, but otherwise the material’s fine.


[33:26] LAURA: “Okay, I was making sure it was not like, a bomb or something that we would need to be careful with.”


[33:31] STEVEN: “Yeah, you’ve seen my style for how I like to roll in to planets.”


[33:36] CAMERON: Karma starts running through a list of all of the members of crime gangs from the outer rim that she’s turned in.


[33:42] NICK: There’s a looooooot!


[33:44] CAMERON: Yeah.


[33:45] NICK: Most crime syndicates and gangs know about you, do not like you.


[33:51] CAMERON: Yup.


[33:52] NICK: The good news is I would imagine being an alien in the Star Wars universe, even one that’s fairly popular, unless you have like a really obvious calling card, since most species don’t recognise each other with a ton of detail they’re not going to see somebody and be like “Oh, that’s Karma.” So it’s like, the reason people all recognise Jango and Boba Fett is ‘cause they have super obvious Mandalorean armour so they can be recognised. Most people aren’t going to be like “Hey, that lady with the antennae is Aurra Sing, although that’s not a great example because she’s the only one that looks like that.


[34:23] LAURA: Because she literally is her own thing and they won’t release what her race is because she is a hybrid that’s just there!


[34:30] NICK: Yeah. So like a better example would be like if you see a giant Wookie wander into an area, unless you’re like very familiar with a certain Wookie you’re not gonna be like “Oh look, that’s Chewbacca, that famous Wookie!”, you’re just gonna be like “That’s a Wookie,” so yeah it’s possible if you like personally arrested somebody they would probably recognise you, but if someone had just heard about you, you’d probably be okay. So, not the best of situations, but not an obvious like faux pas.


[34:58] CAMERON: Mkay!


[34:59] NICK: “So, you all on board? Tink, my man, you willing to delivery my briefcase?”


[35:04] HUDSON: “Doesn’t look like we have a choice!”


[35:06] NICK: “Yeeahh! This is why me and you understand each other. You’ve done this kind of thing before.”


[35:10] HUDSON: “Wait, is this going to come into come weird story that brings back my past?”


[35:17] NICK: “Um… I don’t know why you would think that! Shouldn’t!”


[35:20] HUDSON: “You sounded foreboding.”


[35:21] NICK: “Oh, well yeah, I’m an imperial governor working against the law, of course I sound foreboding from time to time.”


[35:30] HUDSON: “That wasn’t a complaint, it was an observation.”


[35:32] NICK: “And you’re quite an observant fellow, so, anyway, I’ll give you a pass outta here. I would recommend against coming back seeing as how you left and then Imperials ended up dead. But I’ll delay the full investigation until after you’re gone. I’m seeing some confused looks. Even if they were deserters, you killed Imperials! Probably not great!”


[35:56] STEVEN: “The – the trees killed Imperials.”


[35:57] LAURA: “Yes, to be fair, the one, the Trooper was killed by a tree, and then-


[36:04] STEVEN: “Then the monkey killed one.”


[36:05] LAURA: “And me killing, uh, the officer was an accident; I thought he had a gun, I accidentally threw a grenade. You know how these things happen. My bad.”


[36:16] CAMERON: “And the monkeys got Duelson.”


[36:20] NICK: “Did you say you quick-drew a grenade? You were in a gunfight and you threw a grenade?”


[36:24] LAURA: “It was what I had in my pocket.”


[36:26] NICK: “Well that’s concerning.”


[36:27] LAURA: “I didn’t have my gun at the moment.”


[36:28] STEVEN: “Yeah, we actually didn’t have guns…”


[36:29] CAMERON: That’s not even a deception! That’s natural, that’s true! She’d set her gun down, she had grenades, that’s what she had.


[36:37] LAURA: “I did not have my gun, so…”


[36:39] NICK: “So! Um. I don’t know how familiar you are with the Imperial justice system, but speaking as someone with a pretty high place in it, my organisation is suuuuuper racist! Probably doesn’t matter what you did!”


[36:52] LAURA: Xianna is kinda just like staring at him, like, ya realise you’re talking to someone whose planet has been occupied for, like, ever.


[37:01] CAMERON: Karma’s look says “You realise you’re an alien, right?”


[37:03] NICK: Yeah, he-


[37:04] CAMERON: Wait! We are all aliens! None of us in this room are human.


[37:08] LAURA: Karma and Xianna are both having this at the same time sort of like, you realise you are talking to aliens and Xianna has the like, I’m from Ryloth. And then wait, looking around like-


[37:18] CAMERON: And then like you’re an alien….


[37:19] LAURA: -we’re all aliens!


[37:21] NICK: So, he just kind of waggles his eyebrows at you all. Like, he gets it and still, he has realised how to work within that structure and been pretty successful. So, he says “So, you’re mostly patched up, you have your particularly important baggage. So, begone! Or, whatever.”


[37:44] LAURA: So, Xianna has the datapad with the coordinates, and then she goes and takes the briefcase and is kinda looking between Karma and Tink, like back and forth and then kinda slowly starts handing it to Karma.


[37:58] CAMERON: Karma takes the briefcase.


[38:02] STEVEN: “Awww…”


[38:03] NICK: Sabos reaches for the briefcase and then looks sad when he doesn’t get it.


[38:05] STEVEN: Yup.


[38:07] STEVEN: I take the datapad.


[38:10] HUDSON: I take the datapad because I’m actually driving.


[38:12] STEVEN: Are you though?


[38:13] LAURA: How are you guys getting the datapad? I’m holding it and it’s probably in a pocket. Do you wanna search my coat?


[38:20] HUDSON: Wouldn’t be the first time I – uh wait-


[38:23] STEVEN: No…


[38:24] HUDSON: Never mind.


[38:24] LAURA: No, wait it would be, hold on.


[38:26] HUDSON: Cut! Cut! Cut! It would be the first time.


[38:27] LAURA: I mean, if you wanna try… Go for it.


[38:31] HUDSON: “Can I have the datapad please?”


[38:32] STEVEN: “Can I have the datapad? I’m the better pilot.”


[38:34] LAURA: I’m assuming you say it both at the exact same time.


[38:36] STEVEN: Yeah.


[38:37] CAMERON: And then Sabos adds “I’m a better pilot.”


[38:41] LAURA: Xianna takes it out.


[38:41] STEVEN: “I’m, I’m from the Outer Rim.”


[38:42] LAURA: Likem is it just coordinates that are pulled up or?


[38:45] NICK: Uh nothing’s pulled up, it’s blank, but if you tap through it, it’s pretty much “Welcome to your new technology!” pop up screen, and you can see one file on it that’s ust coordinates.


[38:54] LAURA: Oh, okay.


[38:55] NICK: This is like a very cheap, throwaway datapad.


[38:56] LAURA: Since it just hust has coordinates she begrudgingly hands it to Sabos.


[39:01] STEVEN: That’s right.


[39:01] LAURA: ‘Cause she thinks that he is capable of flying.


[39:04] CAMERON: Oh yeah, she’s still not sure.


[39:09] LAURA: She’s still not sure. She doesn’t like Sabos that much right now, but she thinks he can fly.


[39:12] STEVEN: I take it and nod assuringly.


[39:14] HUDSON: I turn and go “Really?! Really.”


[39:18] LAURA: “You are not the pilot unless… are you the pilot?”


[39:20] HUDSON: “I am the pilot!”


[39:22] STEVEN: “Do you have any astrogation abilities at all?”


[39:24] CAMERON: Karma turns to Falx.


[39:27] LAURA: Xianna turns to Karma like, “Wait, which one is the pilot? I thought Sabos was flying with you. Is Tink now flying with you?”


[39:33] CAMERON: So Karma turns to Falx like, “So what are the names of the people? Or call signs, if they don’t go by names. The try to find that hit us this time, I’d like to avoid it.”


[39:45] NICK: “Yeah, that makes sense. Uh, I don’t really operate like Sentinel does, I’ll straight tell you. You’re gonna be wanting to meet up with Quiggle the Quarren.”


[39:54] STEVEN: Oh god.


[39:55] NICK: “It’s him and his small crew of smugglers.”


[39:56] STEVEN: That was, that was out of character, just oh god.


[39:58] NICK: “I don’t know why you’re laughing, Quiggle the Quarren is a perfectly respectable criminal name!”


[40:04] CAMERON: “Yup.”


[40:05] {ALL LAUGHING}


[40:07] LAURA: “His name is the Quiggle?” {she pronounces the name incorrectly, like Kwee-gell}


[40:09] CAMERON: “Yup.”


[40:10] NICK: “No, no, sweetness like this: Quiggel.”


[40:13] LAURA: “Quiggel.” {still pronouncing slightly incorrectly}


[40:14] NICK: “No, no, Quiggel.”


[40:16] LAURA: “Quiggel?” {still a little off}


[40:18] NICK: “Better, better.”


[40:20] CAMERON: “Anyway, the coordinates, are they taking us to a warehouse? A club? Do they know that we’re coming?”


[40:26] NICK: “Well, they’re expecting us shortly, and by us I mean you, because I’m not going. It, those coordinates lead to a small asteroid belt in the middle of nowhere, towards the Outer Rim. They are probably waiting now which is why you need to go there first. ‘Cause if you make them wait too long, they’re going to come to me, I’ll be forced to kill them, lose a business avenue and then I’ll be uh, sending our good friend the assisting Governor out to go and find you.


[40:51] CAMERON: “Yeah, that seems rough.”


[40:53] STEVEN: “Is he governor the galaran… gig-giggle the governor?”


[40:58] {ALL LAUGHING}


[40:58] LAURA: What?


[40:59] STEVEN: I’m just trying to make up names damnit!


[41:00] CAMERON: No, different, different.


[41:01] STEVEN: There’s Quiggle and Giggle the gov-


[41:03] NICK: “No, you’ll remember that the Governor’s name was Regional Governor Silpin.”


[41:06] STEVEN: “Oh!”


[41:08] CAMERON: “We, like, just heard from him.”


[41:10] STEVEN: “Yeah…”


[41:11] NICK: “He was the guy with the eyepatch. And the sick mutton chops.”


[41:15] HUDSON: “He doesn’t pay attention.”


[41:16] STEVEN: “I didn’t have any business with him.”


[41:18] LAURA: “No, I did. But do not worry, we will go to this asteroid belt right away. Drop off your briefcase first.”


[41:26] NICK: “Wonderful.”


[41:27] HUDSON: “Thanks for fuelling up our ship before we go.”


[41:29] LAURA: “Why would you say that?”


[41:30] NICK: {LAUGHING} Oh I love it. No that’s wonderful. “Yeah we totally did that, just uh don’t check your fuel levels.”


[41:38] CAMERON: I heard “feeling up your ship”. Thanks for feeling up our ship!


[41:44] LAURA: Oh wait, is that not what he said?


[41:46] {Laura, Cameron and Hudson all say “Fuelling” at the same time}


[41:48] HUDSON: Fuelling!


[41:49] LAURA: Oh! I short of just heard “feeling up our ship” and that’s why I said “why would you say that?”


[41:52] {ALL LAUGHING}


[41:53] HUDSON: That would make a lot less sense than “fuelling”.


[41:54] LAURA: I thought he was referencing the fact that they searched the ship! That’s what I thought you were saying ‘cause you’re you!


[42:02] NICK: {speaking as Falx, although they have been speaking out of character} “Well, we did FEEL up your ship, but we did not FUEL up your ship.


[42:06] STEVEN: That’s a nice ship.


[42:08] HUDSON: “Awwwww. Well how are we gonna get off this planet?”


[42:10] NICK: “You’ve got enough fuel! Star Wars doesn’t have rules for gas!”


[42:16] CAMERON: True.


[42:17] LAURA: Yeah, until a ship breaks down. Because he decides. Then we have to figure it out.


[42:21] NICK: “The only time you’ll run out of fuel is when it’s helpful for the story.” He turns his swivel chair around and gazes out the back window over the sunset that’s going over the jungle of Unroola Dawn and we get a nice camera angle of you all sihouetted looking at his silhouette looking out the window in this pretty office. And then… was there anything else that you all wanted to do in Outpost 4, before you leave?


[42:51] HUDSON: No.


[42:52] STEVEN: Not particularly.


[42:53] CAMERON: Hmm… no.


[42:56] LAURA: Did Tink wanna try and fix the ship again before we leave?


[42:58] HUDSON: I thought they fixed it.


[43:00] NICK: They did, they fixed it.


[43:01] LAURA: They did fix it? Okay cool, nevermind.


[43:02] NICK: They sent in those engineers to investigate the ship, slash duct tape that piece back down.


[43:05] HUDSON: Yeah because I told them it was basically maybe fixed, right? Yeah? Maybe? And then, like, they fixed it.


[43:11] LAURA: Cool. I mean Xianna is going to go through her room when we get back on the ship.


[43:19] NICK: Okay.


[43:20] LAURA: Just to do like a thorough search of did they take anything, because I did have a few things in the room still. And like did they leave anything?


[43:28] NICK: Yeah. So, the camera cuts to you all getting back on the ship. It opens with Sabos in the pilot seat looking really proud of himself, flipping all the overhead switches to on, fiddling with doodads, turning a wheel that doesn’t seem to be attached to anything and the ship making the “BVOOOOOOO” {imitating the noise of a ship starting up} noises as it cycles up.


[43:49] CAMERON: Karma’s going about behind him and flipping off the ones that don’t actually need to be turned on for the ship to work.


[43:56] NICK: Okay, so it’s Sabos going tink, tink, tink, tink, tink, tink, tink, tink and Karma coming behind and like every fourth one being like flip, flip, flip adjusting the ship to normal levels. That’s great. Cut to Xianna in her room looking around. What are y’all specifically worried about?


[44:13] LAURA: Well I’m gonna check the weird mask-in-a-box thing that I have, just, ya know making sure that’s still a mask inside a box. And I just wanna go through everything to make sure they didn’t leave any trackers or like listening devices or anything.


[44:29] NICK: Sure! What a great idea to check your room for trackers or listening devices. Make me a skullduggery check please.


[44:36] LAUA: Can do! What’s the difficulty?


[44:39] NICK: Hard. ‘Cause you’re doing a deeeep search.


[44:42] {DICE NOISES}


[44:46] LAURA: Heeey, so that is a full triumph that has its success, and then two advantages.


[44:54] NICK: Okay. How would you like the spend that triumph and the advantages?


[44:59] LAURA: Okay. I would like to find if they put anything first of all.


[45:04] NICK: Well yeah, that goes with the success.


[45:05] LAURA: If they out anything I would like to find that. I would like to figure out the vent that I previously thought was a vent is actually a garbage disposal.


[45:15] NICK: Awwww!


[45:15] LAURA: I would like to know that. I would like to accidentally press a button and hear it whirl and be like “Oh! Good thing I did not put anything inside of that.” and then shout out and be like “Everyone! This vent here is not a vent! Is a garbage disposal. Be careful.”


[45:32] NICK: So what that is, is you open it just to see if anything is in there and as you open it you hit the little button on the side and you actually see the grass below the ship and you go “Oh! That’s what that does!” And so yeah, now you know that that’s a direct like, “get this out of the ship” shoot.


[45:51] LAURA: Good.


[45:53] NICK: Okay, so you could use your triumph on that since that cancels out the despair that you had earlier. That’s a bummer. I had plans doe that. But that’s fine. Uh, you do find one tracking device slash surveillance unit. It’s uh, pretty big and they had it up under the bed, like hooked into the material that makes the bed spin and on it in like Sharpie basically it says like “You can’t blame us for trying” and has a little signature that looks like Falx’s name. So,


[45:22] LAURA: I toss it down my newly discovered garbage disposal. And then shout out to everyone like “There are – you should check your bedrooms. If you are not good at the searching I will help but they probably put tracking devices, or maybe recording devices, check the refresher, they maybe put video cameras inside that one. They do that sometimes, is funny.”


[46:44] CAMERON: You hear from the cockpit where Karma is doing damage control on Sabos trying to turn the ship on “They Xianna could you please check out my room while I’m up here with the Togrutan?


[46:55] NICK: We’ll fast forward through any rolls that’ll happen there – you were successful enough. There is a video camera under the toilet seat of the refresher, pointed straight up.


[47:06] LAURA: Xianna, the moment she finds it like holds her arm out and shouts for the rest to be like “See? I told you! It is always a camera in the refresher.”


[47:17] NICK: But that’s pretty much all you find. It seems like to you with all the success that you had that the engineers put stuff in there but did not try very hard. And that it was mostly because Falx had to follow those procedures, not because he was actually all that interested in tracking you. Especially considering that if they track you to his illegal dealings you may have some problems. So It was preeeetty obvious. Like you could see the camera when you lifted the toilet seat, it was like right there. Is anybody else doing anything on the ship before you take off?


[47:46] STEVEN: I’m gonna pilot.


[47:48] NICK: Okay.


[47:48] HUDSON: I’m in the engine room and I’m kinda muttering to myself, upset that I’m not piloting the ship. That’s all I’m doing.


[47:55] NICK: Awww.


[47:56] STEVEN: Since I can listen to the engine room I say down to the engine room “You’re a better engineer than I am, so stay down in the engine room.”


[48:03] HUDSON: “Someday I’ll pilot.” That’s all I say back.


[48:06] NICK: {laughing} You shake your fist at the comm in the engine room.


[48:08] HUDSON: I shake, I shake my fist just up at the piloting area.


[48:10] STEVEN: I say “You very well might.” and turn off the feed.


[48:13] NICK: Haha, okay so-


[48:14] CAMERON: Karma flips it back on.


[48:16] NICK: {laughing} The, uh, ship takes off, not gonna make you do a piloting check for a basic take off-


[48:22] STEVEN: Good. That’s awesome.


[48:22] {LAUGHTER}


[48:23] NICK: – uh, yeah, very good. And you uh, fly up and the camera cuts to you all in orbit as you’re starting to do an astrogation check on where you’re going to go.


[48:29] STEVEN: Sure.


[48:30] NICK: And you see a little alert saying that you have an incoming message, but instead of that being routed to the cockpit it’s routed to the holo-theatre in the Afternoon Delight.


[48:39] LAURA: Ooooooh!


[48:41] STEVEN: Oh….


[48:41] NICK: So it’s showing, like, on the dashboard there’s a little blinking light and after looking at it for a minute you figure out that it means there’s something in the holo-theatre right now.


[48:48] CAMERON: I hit the acknowledge button and say “You’ve got this.” and I walk back to the holo-theatre.


[48:54] LAURA: Yeah, Xianna’s gonna be in there too.


[48:56] HUDSON: I go in there.


[48:58] NICK: It’s the equivalent of being-


[48:59] LAURA: We’re in orbit so it doesn’t matter.


[48:59] NICK: – Orbit is the equivalent of being parked so you can go if you want.


[49:01] STEVEN: Yeah, why not?


[49:03] NICK: Okay, so you all go to the holo-theatre, it’s kinda set up like a planetarium it’s round and with a domed ceiling and it’s got those weird step-benches that you see in the auditoriums where like you sit on them but they’re just like big, too-tall steps and they’re carpeted in thick, red shag carpeting and there’s some gold highlights running through the ceiling. And as you all sit down a holo-projector pops on and you see a full-body image of Sentinel. He is sitting in a chair and he has like a brown, kinda shapeless, robe on and he has his grey hair slicked back and he says “Ah, so you managed to complete the first part of your task. Wonderful! Well, I guess you need to know what happens next, don’t you?” And he eyes the camera and that’s where we’ll end the episode.


[49:50] {All making cinematic noises}


[49:56] HUSDON: {singing} For the longest time, the longest time.


[49:57] CAMERON: Thanks for listening to Tabletop Squadron. If you enjoyed our show please consider logging into iTunes and giving us a five-star review. Five-star reviews will help new listeners to find the show. Xianna’fan is played by Laura Penrod. She can be found on Twitter at @cheerio_buffet. Tink is played by Hudson Jameson and he can be found on Twitter at @hudsonjameson. Karma Nailo is played by me, Cameron Robertson. You can find me on Twitter at @midnightmusic13. Sabos Nix was played by Steven Schroeder. He… does not exist on the internet. Our game master is Nick Robertson and you can find him on Twitter at @alias58. Our intro song is Space Jam by Pablo Ribot. Additional music by James Gunter. Follow the podcast on twitter and instagram at @tabletop_squad – for real! We’re real people and we wanna talk to anyone who listens to the show. Reach out! See you next time.



Appearing in episode 10, the Starship Juice is a delicious, fruity tiki drink that packs a punch.

This tropical themed drink has three types of rum, lime and grapefruit juice, pimento dram, and a honey syrup.


The pimento (or allspice) dram can be a little difficult to find, but any larger liquor store should carry it.

It adds a wonderful hint of spice that would be hard to replace.


We got our Star Wars tiki glasses from ThinkGeek, if you were wondering.


Starship Juice [serves 1]

1 ounce blended lightly aged rum (we used Mount Gay Eclipse)
1 ounce blended aged rum (we used Real McCoy 5 year)
1 ounce black blended rum (we used Goslings Black Seal)
1 ounce honey syrup
1 ounce grapefruit juice
1 ounce lime juice
¼ ounce pimento or allspice dram

Combine in a shaker with ice and shake well. Strain into a rocks glass or tiki glass with crushed ice.

Little umbrella optional.


Honey Syrup

1 cup water
1 cup honey

Add water and honey to a saucepan over medium heat. Stir until the honey has fully dissolved. Remove from the heat and let cool completely.

Ah, the Flameout. While Sabos’s (RIP) favorite drink has made it into a few different episodes this drink is originally from the Extended Universe (or Legends). It has been described as “producing sensations similar to a scalding of the tongue and a freezing of the throat”.  After a bit of thinking we decided on a variation of a Moscow Mule, with the spice of pepper and the bite of ginger to “scald the tongue” and the cooling effect of mint to “freeze the throat.”



Flameout in a copper mug, with garnishes


This drink is spicy. This drink is intense. This drink is… not for the faint of heart. It combines a pepper infused vodka, a ginger-mint syrup, and ginger beer to create a truly unique drink. While some of the squadron actually enjoyed the flameout, others declared it “heinous” and “an affront to nature.” Whether you enjoy this drink depends entirely on how much you enjoy high spice levels and strong flavors.


This drinks involves a bit of prep to make properly. First, the Serrano Infused Vodka: serrano peppers are cut in half and left to sit in vodka for at least 24 hours, but up to a week. How long you let them sit will directly affect the heat level. We wanted to try the Flameout at its most intense, so we let it infused for a full 7 days.

The infused vodka could, realistically, be made with any pepper you have on hand, but we preferred the brightness of serranos.


The Ginger Mint Syrup is a little more involved than other syrups we’ve featured in the past, but it’s still incredibly easy. Ginger and water are combined in a saucepan. When it begins to boil, sugar is added. Once the sugar is dissolved the mint is added and removed from the heat. After 12 hours the ginger and mint are strained out, leaving a delightfully strong simple syrup.



Flameout [serves 1]

1 ½ ounces Serrano Infused Vodka (recipe below)
½ ounce Ginger Mint Syrup (recipe below)
4 ounces ginger beer
Garnish: lime wedge, mint sprig

Pour the vodka and syrup into a copper mug or rocks glass. Fill with ice and pour in the ginger beer.

Serrano Infused Vodka

16 ounces vodka
2 serrano peppers, sliced

Combine in a glass jar and let sit for 24 hours up to 1 week. Strain out the peppers and store in an airtight container.

Ginger Mint Syrup

½ cup peeled and thinly sliced ginger (about 100 grams)
¾ cup packed mint leaves (about 25 grams)
2 cups sugar
1 cup water

Add ginger and water to a saucepan over high heat and bring to a boil. Add the sugar and stir until fully dissolved, about 1 minute. Add the mint. Remove from the heat. Let sit for 12 hours. Strain before using.



Word document download: Episode 5 Death Doesn’t Fall Far From the Tree

PDF download: Episode 5 Death Doesn’t Fall Far From the Tree

Read in browser:

Episode 5 Death Doesn’t Fall Far From the Tree

The transcription provided have been created through a mix of software and manual editing. We have tried our best to indicate overlapping speech, cross-party talk, and interruptions. “In character” speech has been italicized as best as possible.


Laura’s character Xianna’fan speaks in somewhat of a French accent.


We apologize for any misspellings or mistakes. Please send any corrections, comments, or concerns to tabletopsquadron@gmail.com



[00:00:18] – Nick

[background guitar music]

Hi everyone and welcome to Tabletop Squadron, a Star Wars Edge of the Empire actual play podcast. I’m Nick, your gamemaster. Every other Thursday our story follows a thief, a bounty hunter, a fringer and a slicer as they explore the galaxy helping a mysterious benefactor and each other. Additional music this week is In Suspense by Psychedelic Pedestrians.


[00:00:41] – Steven

Hey Squadron. Just so you know we’ll be releasing the drink and food recipes we mention in the episodes on our website. www.tabletopsquadron.com. Check it out.


[00:00:52] – Nick

We hope you enjoy the episode.


[00:00:54] – Nick

Hello and welcome to Episode 5 of Tabletop Squadron. I’m your host Nick and I am sitting here with the whole squad yet again. You’re still here. Are you OK? Go around the table and say who you are and what character you’re playing.


[00:01:10] – Steven

Hi I’m Steven. I’m playing Sabos the Togruta


[00:01:15] – Hudson

I’m Hudson. It’s great to be here. I’m playing Tink the Gigoran.


[00:01:20] – Laura

Hi I’m Laura. I play Xianna. I’m a Twi’lek.


[00:01:24] – Cameron

Hi I’m Cameron I’m playing Karma and I’m a Nautolan.


[00:01:29] – Nick

Great. So we’ve gotten some experience points since the last time we played and everybody has spent some so go around the room and just say how you have upgraded your character.


[00:01:40] – Steven

This is Sabos. I bought street smarts and grit.


[00:01:43] – Nick

Good work.


[00:01:44] – Steven



[00:01:45] – Nick

I’m sure that will come in handy.


[00:01:46] – Steven

It probably won’t.


[00:01:47] – Nick

It might. You don’t know, you’re in a jungle right now but it could happen.


[00:01:52] – Hudson

This is Tink and I upgraded to level 2 on melee. [Group: Ooooohhh] Suuuper Smaaaaash Brother


[00:02:01] – Nick

Now we’ll get sued! Next.


[00:02:03] – Laura

This is Laura. I just play Xianna. I guess those two are like, going full Daniel Day Lewis up in here and becoming-


[00:02:11] – Cameron

Could you not tell by Hudson’s fur suit?


[00:02:11] – Laura

-they’re character.


[00:02:13] – Steven

I do have four head tails.


[00:02:16] – Laura

They are really going for it. I bought ranks in cool and deception.


[00:02:21] – Nick

All right so now you have like one of those flat brimmed baseball caps…


[00:02:24] – Cameron



[00:02:26] – Nick

and shutter shades.


[00:02:27] – Laura

I’ve popped my collar and yeah, put on some shutter shades.


[00:02:31] – Nick



[00:02:32] – Cameron

For Karma. I upgraded melee to rank 2 and vigilance to rank 2.


[00:02:40] – Nick

All right so before we get started let’s do the Destiny role.


[00:02:46] – Hudson

I’ll go first. I’ll go first.


[00:02:48] – Cameron



[00:02:50] – Hudson

One light side [dice sounds]


[00:02:52] – Laura

1 light side


[00:02:56] – Steven

One dark side.


[00:03:00] – Cameron

One dark side.


[00:03:01] – Laura

That side of the table is not doin’ good.


[00:03:06] – Nick

Good work everybody. We’re all very proud.


[00:03:09] – Hudson and Laura

I’m not. [Group laughs]


[00:03:11] – Laura

This side of the table rolled light side. So we’re proud of ourselves.


[00:03:16] – Nick

Makes sense.


[00:03:18] – Cameron

I still support you Steven.


[00:03:19] – Steven



[00:03:20] – Nick

You shouldn’t.


[00:03:23] – Cameron

Not in character though.


[00:03:24] – Nick

Oh so things that have happened recently. Falx gave you all a job in exchange for the contraband that you were sent by Sentinel to go and fetch he sent you after some deserters that may have blown some stuff up and killed some people on their way out of town they’re hiding out in the jungle somewhere and you fought really weird centipede monkeys with lobster tails and some people got stabbed and-


[00:03:55] – Steven

just one


[00:03:56] – Nick

Someone got stabbed and your guide Mills ran off and the last thing that happened was he came back with a bunch of corpses of more millipede monkeys and said well we’ll scatter these around to make sure that we have a moment. We need to we need to take a second to plan and so that’s where we will take it back up again. So he immediately starts shredding up some of these monkey guts. The good news is they all have big blaster holes in them so he just kind of reaches in and roots around and he starts scattering it around like a flower girl at a wedding in a circle around this clearing. So he says that’ll that will keep the trees back. Hey could someone go to the back of the speeder? There is a silver shiny box in there we’re gonna need that for a minute.


[00:04:45] – Hudson

I ran back to the speeder and get it.


[00:04:46] – Steven

You mean the stone breaker?


[00:04:49] – Nick

I don’t know what that is.


[00:04:52] – Laura

Shhhh- Do not say things.


[00:04:53] – Steven

My bad


[00:04:53] – Laura

I thought- I thought we talked about this last time. Do not talk ever.


[00:04:57] – Steven

[whispers] ever.


[00:04:57] – Laura



[00:04:58] – Steven

[whispers] –the monkey wounds


[00:04:58] – Laura

Be quiet.


[00:05:00] – Hudson

I go get the -uh- box.


[00:05:02] – Nick

Okay so you head over to the speeder. It is a large speeder with room for everyone that is setup for off road. So it’s got kind of skids under the repulsors in case it bottoms out and on the back there’s a big crate and so you head to the back and open it up and you see a silver like cubic case with some latches on it and on the ground next to you, you see Sparks who as you may remember the junior officer that was riding with you. And there’s a monkey on his chest chewing through his neck right now so I need a vigilance roll from you on how quickly you respond. As it looks up in you and goes -hhheeeeesss- and gets ready to jump at you.


[00:05:39] – Hudson

Oh [Steven: not Spark Duelson] no.


[00:05:41] – Cameron

We’re not behind the thing.


[00:05:42] – Hudson

One success


[00:05:44] – Nick

One success. Okay so you can roll an attack against this thing before it gets to you.


[00:05:48] – Hudson

Yayyyyyy I’d like to roll an attack against it. So that’s going to be two yellows and a green. What’s the difficulty?


[00:05:56] – Cameron

Melee is always 2.


[00:05:58] – Nick

She’s right.


[00:06:01] – Hudson

[dice sounds] So we have three successes and an advantage.


[00:06:05] – Nick

Okay how much damage does your massive vibroaxe do?


[00:06:09] – Hudson



[00:06:10] – Cameron

So plus 3


[00:06:11] – Nick

Plus your brawn right?


[00:06:12] – Hudson

Nope, my brawn plus 3 is 6.


[00:06:14] – Nick

Oh okay


[00:06:15] – Cameron

plus 3


[00:06:16] – Nick

So 9 damage?


[00:06:17] – Hudson

So 9 damage.


[00:06:17] – Nick

Yeah you just slice this thing in half and it goes -hiiiiisss- -eep- and it just kind of falls apart. Mills walks up behind you goes oh you’re adding to the circle. Great and he looks down and Sparks, the junior officer is super dead like his throat is chewed all the way back to the bone and he’s just on the ground he’s not even twitching and Mills kind of looks down and goes Oh… eh. And he and he just keeps walking around. He says grab that grab that case and lets go. So he finishes the circle and stands in the middle of the clearing.


[00:06:50] – Cameron

I walk back over to the back when I see Mills walk back there and see Sparks on the ground. Feel sad for a minute because he’s had the same length of life as my sons and that’s sad. And then I pull him to the side a little bit. So the speeder is blocking Mill’s view and I search his pockets.


[00:07:07] – Nick

Oh… okay.


[00:07:09] – Laura

Xianna walks over and she’s like is there something behind the speeder?


[00:07:14] – Cameron



[00:07:14] – Laura

Ohhhh zat’s sad.


[00:07:17] – Cameron



[00:07:19] – Laura

I was going to mess with him.


[00:07:21] – Cameron

Yeah, well the monkeys did first.


[00:07:25] – Steven

what monkeys


[00:07:26] – Nick

so I guess searching his pockets I would need a average skullduggery check from you.


[00:07:32] – Cameron

Okay. Hey I have a skulduggery. Okay… average. [dice sounds] Alright. That is a success and an advantage.


[00:07:43] – Nick

OK so you find not a lot like you find less on this guy than you would expect for somebody who was going on an expedition with potential hostiles in a hostile environment. You do find a really low clearance imperial code cylinder in his pocket and he had a light blaster pistol on a holster and he had like a couple of ration bars, just… crackers, cracker bar things.


[00:08:13] – Cameron

How many?


[00:08:14] – Nick



[00:08:15] – Cameron



[00:08:16] – Nick



[00:08:16] – Cameron

Three crackers.


[00:08:17] – Nick

Yes. And really that’s it. He was pretty light on gear. It’s almost like he got assigned this very quickly and didn’t have time to pack or didn’t understand where he was going. One or the other.


[00:08:30] – Cameron



[00:08:31] – Laura

What rank was he again?


[00:08:32] – Nick

He was a petty officer.


[00:08:34] – Laura



[00:08:35] – Hudson

But we do have his clearance card now right?


[00:08:36] – Cameron

Yes I do-


[00:08:37] – Nick

You have his code cylinder. It [Cameron: I tuck the code cylinder-]  probably opens-


[00:08:39] – Cameron

-into my jacket.


[00:08:41] – Nick

It opens some things maybe.


[00:08:42] – Cameron

Put the crackers in whatever bag I’m carrying. And then strap the light blaster to my other hip that doesn’t have a heavy pistol on it.


[00:08:51] – Nick

You’re just collecting guns.


[00:08:53] – Cameron

Yep. I have a light blaster, a heavy pistol and a blaster carbine.


[00:08:58] – Nick

The good news is you’re strong. The bad news is eventually incumbrance may be a thing.


[00:09:02] – Cameron

I’ll start handing out guns to other people as they deserve them.


[00:09:04] – Nick

  1. [group laughs] It’s-


[00:09:07] – Cameron

I feel like your good with your axe though.


[00:09:09] – Hudson

[too muffled to hear] -either but I don’t have one.


[00:09:10] – Cameron

Maybe we’ll have a training session.


[00:09:12] – Nick

You’re handing out guns like a kindergarten teacher hands out star stickers.


[00:09:16] – Cameron

Yeah. Good job, you gain a gun on your chart.


[00:09:19] – Nick

OK so Tink, do you bring the silver box to the middle?


[00:09:23] – Hudson



[00:09:24] – Nick

All right. So Mills says thanks. As he like wipes his hands on his pants and you see he’s made a pretty decent circle out of monkey guts and maybe you’re imagining it but the trees do seem to be kind of leaning back a little bit from the circle. It’s probably just a trick of perspective. I wouldn’t worry about it and Mills with a click snaps the four latches off the top and pulls the top off and the four sides of the box fall open like a industrial flower. And inside there’s another one of those heater lantern things like you had in your guest quarters slash tool shed-


[00:09:59] – Cameron

Garden house


[00:10:00] – Nick

garden shed. Yeah. And he turns on the heater and the warm light makes you feel a little better he says These trees put spores out and we don’t want to track those back to the base. Also you know like, they eat flesh but it’s not a big deal this will bake them out so we’ll take a minute here to do that. Shame about Sparks. At least that’s probably what I’m supposed to say. I don’t really like the Empire that much. One of the officers is dating my sister


[00:10:29] – Cameron



[00:10:30] – Hudson



[00:10:31] – Nick

He seems pretty milk toast. I don’t understand, as he like pulls bits of guts off of his out of his chest hair from his shirt. He flicks them into the heater and they like sizzle and vaporize. So I’m just working for them because they’re the only people here at this point but they’re probably bunkered down somewhere up ahead. That’s why there might be so many bug monkeys around so maybe if we can find their camp you can take these guys out or whatever you’re supposed to do. What’s the plan?


[00:11:01] – Laura

Do any of you know like how to track people or hunt or you know do things in the wilderness? …..cause I do not.


[00:11:14] – Steven

One could say I have limited survival skills. [Cameron laughs]


[00:11:18] – Laura

Define limited.


[00:11:19] – Steven

More than you.


[00:11:20] – Hudson



[00:11:21] – Nick

Mills goes Oooo


[00:11:21] – Laura

I mean-


[00:11:22] – Cameron



[00:11:22] – Laura



[00:11:23] – Cameron

She did just say that she had very limited nature.


[00:11:27] – Laura

I tend to stay in cities. That is where there are people you know to steal things from.


[00:11:33] – Cameron

Normally my bounty hunting jobs aren’t this remote. They’re normally criminals hideout where there’s other people but I am pretty good at sneaking up on people.


[00:11:44] – Hudson

I nominate Sabos.


[00:11:46] – Laura

I am good at the sneaking. the sneaking I can do. the tracking-


[00:11:51] – Cameron

the finding.


[00:11:52] – Laura

the finding.


[00:11:53] – Steven

[overlapping Cameron and Laura] As an explorer I probably do have some survivals.


[00:11:56] – Laura

Do you have a rank in survival?


[00:11:57] – Steven

I do.


[00:11:58] – Laura

That is what I am asking about.


[00:12:01] – Cameron

[laughs] His answer, he [mumbles] you have a rank in ‘ze sneak’.


[00:12:04] – Laura

I do have a rank in the sneaking. I have ranks in the… the streetwise and-


[00:12:10] – Cameron

I’m going to slowly start speaking in Xianna’s accent.


[00:12:14] – Laura

If you have ranks in survival you should try tracking.


[00:12:17] – Steven

Rank in survival.


[00:12:18] – Cameron

How cunning are you?


[00:12:19] – Laura

I have lots of cunning so I could help.


[00:12:21] – Steven



[00:12:22] – Cameron

You got three cunning.


[00:12:23] – Laura

I have four cunning so I can always assist.


[00:12:25] – Nick

Yes so when people help and someone has a better base stat but someone has better training. You get to use the best of both. So if Xianna helps Sabos to track you get 3 green die and a yellow.


[00:12:38] – Multiple Speakers



[00:12:39] – Steven

we should do that.


[00:12:40] – Nick

Great. So-


[00:12:42] – Steven

Let’s track things. I guess we are looking for the escaped uhh Lira and Williams.


[00:12:47] – Nick

Yup you’re looking for Lira and Williams.


[00:12:50] – Steven

We don’t know what they look like other than they’re guy and a lady.


[00:12:52] – Cameron

One of them’s a trooper.


[00:12:55] – Multiple Speakers

[gumbled mumbling]


[00:12:56] – Cameron

Lira’s a trooper so she’s probably in the trooper uniform.


[00:13:00] – Steven



[00:13:01] – Cameron

Williams is an officer. He’s probably not in a trooper uniform. There are also three missing troopers.


[00:13:07] – Steven

  1. I’ll just I’ll look around the circle [mumbles]


[00:13:09] – Nick

Well and you’ll remember last session you found a small blood trail leading off from the there.


[00:13:15] – Steven

That’s right.


[00:13:16] – Cameron

Then the monkeys attacked.


[00:13:17] – Steven

[mumbling] tracks the bloodtrails?


[00:13:19] – Nick



[00:13:21] – Cameron

What’s the difficulty? Cause I don’t think you’re rolling any difficulty dice.


[00:13:24] – Laura

Yeah, you need difficulty dice.


[00:13:26] – Nick



[00:13:26] – Laura



[00:13:27] – Steven



[00:13:27] – Cameron

That’s three, yeah.


[00:13:29] – Nick

So you already found the general direction last time. [dice sounds]


[00:13:31] – Steven



[00:13:34] – Cameron



[00:13:35] – Steven

Well that worked out well. I have two successes and two advant-ah- no


[00:13:38] – Cameron



[00:13:38] – Laura



[00:13:38] – Cameron

One success., one advantage.


[00:13:41] – Nick



[00:13:42] – Steven

[whispers] shitty roll.


[00:13:43] – Nick



[00:13:44] – Cameron

most of the purples were blank. That was fine.


[00:13:46] – Nick

so you tracked and you got one success and one advantage.


[00:13:50] – Cameron



[00:13:51] – Nick

Is there any way you would particularly like to spend the advantage?


[00:13:56] – Steven

…not encountering monkeys.


[00:13:58] – Laura

Can… I’m assuming we’re gonna try to be sneaky when we approach them can the least sneaky of us have a blue dice when they make a stealth roll?


[00:14:08] – Nick

I think that is a great tactical decision. How would you explain that using cool descriptions and story stuff?


[00:14:15] – Cameron

[overlapping Nick] We’re gonna put them in the back and the people in front will sneakily fold down any like foilage or anything that’s in the way.


[00:14:24] – Multiple Speakers



[00:14:24] – Cameron

Well there we go. Fold down any foilage [laughs] gosh!


[00:14:27] – Hudson

Any ‘foilage’?


[00:14:28] – Steven

[whispers] You know foilage


[00:14:29] – Cameron

We’re gonna fold down any plant stuff in the way.


[00:14:31] – Laura

Yeah so-


[00:14:32] – Cameron

So that there’s less crinkle noises from the people behind us as we walk.


[00:14:35] – Laura

Yeah Xianna would make sure that Sabos is in the back probably walking… maybe not completely in the back, walking next to someone. Probably Karma. And then-


[00:14:45] – Cameron

Who can throw her arm out to stop him.


[00:14:47] – Laura

And then Tink and Xianna would be more in the front cause surprisingly Tink is kind of sneaky.


[00:14:53] – Hudson

I’m pretty sneaky.


[00:14:54] – Cameron

You do blend into the jungle.


[00:14:56] – Hudson

Well, it’s more-


[00:14:56] – Cameron

As a giant white fluffy thing.


[00:14:58] – Hudson

It’s more just sneaky in general. Give me some credit.


[00:15:01] – Laura

I think it’s his feet are very soft and padded with all the fur so he doesn’t make a lot of sound when he walks.


[00:15:07] – Hudson

Speculation will just confuse the mind. Just know I am sneaky.


[00:15:09] – Steven

but my forehead tail just rubs all the branches the wrong way [Cameron: oh god]. [group laughter]


[00:15:15] – Laura

I think that’s just Sabos in general.


[00:15:18] – Nick

Just, Oooooo


[00:15:19] – Steven

It’s the fourth head tail.


[00:15:21] – Multiple Speakers



[00:15:22] – Cameron

That does seem to be his defining characteristic.


[00:15:25] – Laura

It’s like the only one.


[00:15:27] – Steven

And him being a male Togruta.


[00:15:29] – Laura

There are many male Togrutas.


[00:15:30] – Steven

No there’s not!…There’s like many female Togrutas.


[00:15:34] – Cameron

There’s also many males.


[00:15:35] – Laura

There’s also many males. You’re not like a Selonian.


[00:15:38] – Nick

No it’s an actual thing.


[00:15:39] – Laura

It’s an actual thing but it’s not like Selonian level.


[00:15:42] – Steven

[overlapping Laura] 15 percent to 85 percent is like pretty darn snark.


[00:15:47] – Nick

Well the Selonians, it’s like 1 per 100 or something.


[00:15:50] – Steven



[00:15:51] – Nick

Yeah the otter-people


[00:15:53] – Steven



[00:15:55] – Nick

So based on your success and the fact that you’re staying in the back to where you’re not going to break a buch of branches and be super obvious. You can tell from the blood trail and the age and everything, it’s probably going to be about an hour trek through the jungle or you can take your speeder and try and drive closer. Which would you all choose to do?


[00:16:18] – Steven

I’m pretty comfortable hoofing it, but [whispers] I’m not sure.


[00:16:20] – Hudson

I’ll grab the speeder!


[00:16:22] – Nick

You want to drive?


[00:16:24] – Steven

I can drive


[00:16:25] – Cameron

You’re not driving.


[00:16:27] – Hudson

I can drive for I have the necessary skills required.


[00:16:31] – Steven

As do I.


[00:16:32] – Cameron

I feel like were trying to sneak up on people not being in a speeder would be beneficial.


[00:16:37] – Hudson

My stealth carries over to speeders!


[00:16:40] – Laura

Pretty sure that is not how that works.


[00:16:42] – Cameron

[overlapping Laura] I’m pretty sure it still makes noise.


[00:16:43] – Laura

I think the speeder still makes-


[00:16:45] – Steven

-we should, we should just keep it.


[00:16:46] – Laura



[00:16:46] – Cameron



[00:16:47] – Hudson



[00:16:47] – Laura



[00:16:49] – Hudson

I if we want to we can just walk.


[00:16:52] – Laura

We should walk. It is more sneaky.


[00:16:54] – Hudson



[00:16:55] – Nick

Okay. So the.-There is a swipe cut to you all doing a nice pleasant hike through the jungle-


[00:17:02] – Cameron

The jungle that can eat us.


[00:17:05] – Nick

It’s very Vietnam War movie-esque with people moving in a line, Mills doesn’t really walk with you so much is like action roll through the bushes and he like is getting covered in mud. It looks very Predator and he’ll pop up out of a bush next to you. Which is surprising and discomforting and he’ll make a bunch of hand signals and then disappear back into the underbrush. No one knows what the hand signals mean but he looks pretty confident that you all are headed the right direction. The trail you lose it a couple of times but you’re able to find it again and continue onward. So you do lose a little bit of time and surprisingly Tink does blend in quite well. The shadows model on his white fur and he is able to slip from tree to tree like a ghost.


[00:17:50] – Hudson

Damn right. [group laughs]


[00:17:52] – Nick



[00:17:52] – Cameron

Should we make a stealth check?


[00:17:54] – Nick

Yeah right around now. Gonna need a stealth check.


[00:18:02] – Laura

What the difficulty?


[00:18:05] – Nick



[00:18:05] – Steven

[whispers] do I get a blue dice for this?


[00:18:06] – Nick

Yeah. You get a blue die.


[00:18:08] – Laura



[00:18:09] – Nick

The difficulty is average but everyone has a black die because stealthing through a jungle is difficult.


[00:18:22] – Hudson

[dice sounds] So a wash right?


[00:18:23] – Cameron

Yup. Tink just get a wash.


[00:18:25] – Hudson

Iii- Yeah.


[00:18:26] – Nick

You get nothing. Okay. I take back what I said.


[00:18:32] – Steven

Sweet. I have a success and an advantage. Sabos. Me, Sabos.


[00:18:38] – Nick

Yeah that blue die was super helpful.


[00:18:40] – Steven

It would have been a wash otherwise.


[00:18:43] – Laura

Three successes.


[00:18:43] – Cameron

Alright and Karma also has a blue die because of her stalker talent.


[00:18:51] – Nick



[00:18:52] – Cameron

So she gets a blue die in stealth and coordination checks. [dice sounds]


[00:18:56] – Nick

That’s really neat.


[00:18:57] – Cameron

It is. That is a success and a threat.


[00:19:03] – Nick

Okay so you walk for quite a while. Mill’s is pretty quiet but every once in awhile he just pops up in weird places so you jump a little bit. He’s a scary looking dude. After about 45 minutes you see a storm trooper helmet driven on a spike on a trail. And a storm trooper like la- that storm trooper whose helmet is on this bike is laying face down in the underbrush. Do you investigate the storm trooper?


[00:19:32] – Multiple Speakers



[00:19:32] – Nick

Okay so you roll him over. He’s got a blaster hole in his chest. Looks like he got taken down in the run and you actually see the other two storm troopers scattered in the brush they’re along the trail where you’re heading but they’re all basically just down. Looks like they were in a running gun fight and got the worst of it. They have been stripped of their supplies and weapons and they don’t have any.


[00:19:56] – Nick

Another weird thing they look like, Karma you would know this, I don’t know if anyone else did. They look like they’ve been dead for about five or six days so they’re kind of gross and they don’t smell great but they also have like saplings sprouting like out of their exposed skin.


[00:20:11] – Cameron



[00:20:12] – Nick



[00:20:12] – Laura

Eww that is gross.


[00:20:14] – Nick

And we get a shot of Karma reaching down and kind of rolling one over and inspecting it. And then as you see that he doesn’t have anything worth salvaging and you step away all of the saplings that are growing out of the storm troopers are kind of lean towards you a little and then go back up is probably just the wind.


[00:20:31] – Laura

That is very gross.


[00:20:32] – Cameron

I would put the time of death at five or six days ago. [table murmurs] Based on the trees sprouting?


[00:20:41] – Hudson

So does this mean our fugitives are murderers?


[00:20:45] – Multiple Speakers



[00:20:47] – Laura



[00:20:48] – Steven

I think that was information we were given. 


[00:20:51] – Cameron

There were- there were five troopers did go out after them, two troopers have already been found dead. These are the remaining so


[00:20:59] – Hudson

I see


[00:21:00] – Nick

Mills appears behind you all with no noise and goes Well I guess murder depends on your point of view. And he’s like…


[00:21:06] – Laura

I mean that is true.


[00:21:07] – Nick

possibly cleaning his gun.


[00:21:08] – Laura

Yes. I mean-


[00:21:10] – Cameron

[mumbles] it really depends on the view.


[00:21:12] – Laura

I mean I think it does. I mean from a certain point of view you could say self defense.


[00:21:17] – Nick

You back a lothwolf into a corner, you can’t be surprised when it bites. I would imagine, I’ve never been to Lothal and he walks off down the trail.


[00:21:27] – Laura

Is very dry.


[00:21:30] – Cameron

On Lothal?


[00:21:30] – Laura



[00:21:31] – Nick

Everyone always goes oh but it’s a dry heat and he’s– everyone’s been sweating at this point.


[00:21:36] – Laura

Oh, no, not me?  [rewind sound effect]


[00:21:37] – Nick

Oh you don’t sweat?


[00:21:39] – Laura

I don’t because being a Twi’lek I get to remove setback dice due to arid or hot conditions because Ryloth is a desert.


[00:21:49] – Nick



[00:21:49] – Laura

It is just a fucking desert planet.


[00:21:52] – Nick

So this should be very uncomfortable for you because it’s a jungle.


[00:21:55] – Laura

So the humidity  is getting to me, the wet heat, but the heat itself is fine.


[00:22:00] – Nick

Yeah. Well and that’s the thing. It’s probably only like 90 degrees. I’m exposing that were from Texas and 90 degrees is not a big deal. It’s probably only like 90 degrees but the humidity-


[00:22:10] – Hudson

[overlapping Nick] for our international viewers, 90 degrees


[00:22:12] – Laura

[overlapping Hudson] I was about to say, 90-


[00:22:13] – Cameron



[00:22:15] – Laura

-Fahrenheit is like a nice spring day.


[00:22:17] – Steven

That’s what? 38?


[00:22:19] – Laura



[00:22:20] – Nick

I don’t know, I don’t speak metric. Well it’s not super relevant so anyway,


[00:22:23] – Laura

This is super relevant. What are you talking about? Our like 1 International listener is going to need this information. Hi Ted.


[00:22:33] – Steven

They have the google.


[00:22:34] – Cameron

I’m glistening.


[00:22:35] – Nick

Yeah you’re glistening.


[00:22:36] – Steven

my forehead tail was dripping.


[00:22:37] – Laura

Xianna sees that and is gonna like eww… gross and she like legitimately seems grossedout whereas when like she saw like the dead body she was like ‘ew gross’. This is like visceral. Ugg Gross!


[00:22:54] – Steven

[overlapping Laura] I grab it and wring it out.


[00:22:59] – Hudson

I’m pretty gross right now. I have my fur’s matted.


[00:23:01] – Nick

I would imagine it’s gotten like frizzy too.


[00:23:03] – Hudson



[00:23:04] – Laura

I imagine you smell like a wet dog at this point.


[00:23:06] – Hudson

Yep absolutely.


[00:23:07] – Laura



[00:23:08] – Nick

It does get covered up by the corpses but everyone’s given you a little more space. And that’s part of the reason that you’ve had trouble stealthing is you’re in the middle of the group but they’ve given you space so you’re misjudging your steps a lot because you think people are closer [rewind sound effect] so you continue down the trail. Unless there’s anything else you wanted to do with these stormtroopers


[00:23:26] – Laura



[00:23:27] – Nick

Okay. You continue down the trail you see a couple more kind of warning sign things like sticks tied together. No more like skulls on sticks or anything but like general trail signs for like go away. A tree has been burned out or tried to it’s mostly just kind of blackened because it’s so humid it’s hard to get stuff to burn. And you come to a clearing and there is a like a sled looking thing it looks like a repulsor-sled with some supplies and stuff on it.


[00:23:59] – Nick

You see some guns and you see a very skinny looking guy with short dark hair that started to grow out already out of regulation. He’s wearing one of those khaki army uniforms that you saw some people wearing in the camp but it’s it’s been really shredded up and it’s dirty and it’s the only reason you would recognize it is because you’ve already seen it and he’s got a bandage over one leg and he’s sitting by one of those heater lamps like Mills gave you and Mills says I’ll cover the back exit and disappears into the undergrowth and starts to loop around and that’s what you can see.


[00:24:36] – Hudson

I whisper they didn’t say dead or alive, specifically, so let’s just shoot ’em.


[00:24:41] – Steven

yeah I- I remember clarifying. They were cool with either.


[00:24:45] – Laura

They said either one works so


[00:24:47] – Steven



[00:24:47] – Laura

They did specify.


[00:24:48] – Hudson

Well, I should say they didn’t specify they wanted one over the other.


[00:24:52] – Laura

True but that is what dead or alive means. It means either or both work.


[00:24:58] – Nick

Wait how do you do both? [rewind sound effect]


[00:25:00] – Laura

No. Both [Steven mumbles something] work.  No both [Cameron: not at the same time] work. Not that like [Nick: got it, got it, got it] you bring them in, in a Schrodinger’s Box.


[00:25:08] – Nick

We made that joke already.


[00:25:10] – Laura

It’s that both work. Either one, and or.


[00:25:15] – Nick

Got it.


[00:25:15] – Cameron

What it is is that there’s two of them so one of them’s dead and one of them’s alive [Laura: yeah] that’s okay. That’s how both works.


[00:25:22] – Nick

Yeah I already sent Mills around the clearing so I couldn’t ask-


[00:25:25] – Laura

Or I mean I guess she could in a way do both if you brought them in like with a mortal wound.


[00:25:30] – Cameron

Yeah they gonna be dead.


[00:25:31] – Laura

Like they’re going to die but they’re currently alive.


[00:25:33] – Nick

dead-ish alive.


[00:25:34] – Laura

dead ish. Mostly dead.


[00:25:36] – Nick

[rewind sound effect] We got him in the clearing. He’s got a like a snack bar but it has one little bite out of it but he looks like he’s just kind of staring into the lantern and thinking thoughts.


[00:25:50] – Laura

Where is the other one? there is a second one.


[00:25:56] – Cameron



[00:25:56] – Steven

We see signs of the second one?


[00:25:58] – Nick

And as you wonder that you hear a blaster click on and directly behind you you see a very large woman with short cropped like military hair that hasn’t grown out too much and she is wearing about half of a stormtrooper uniform. She’s got the chest plate and the arm pieces but the rest of the body suit is exposed and the helmet is gone but she has one of the lenses from the helmet like strapped over one eye and you can see like a bunch of wires from the inside of the helmet going down into the armor and she’s got like cargo shorts on and over the the body suit on the bottom and it looks like it’s stuffed full of supplies and things and she says the other one is right here and she points her gun at you all. She got the drop on you.


[00:26:47] – Laura



[00:26:48] – Nick

She could hear.


[00:26:49] – Laura



[00:26:51] – Cameron

Cause she could hear Tink.


[00:26:52] – Laura

How are you doing?


[00:26:54] – Nick

I’m doing great. I’d appreciate if you stepped into the clearing please.


[00:26:58] – Laura

I mean… okayyy. 


[00:27:00] – Steven

You mean that clearing?


[00:27:02] – Laura

What clearing do you think she means?


[00:27:04] – Steven

Well there was that nice one that we were at previously.


[00:27:07] – Laura

Why would she means that one?


[00:27:09] – Steven

Just checking.


[00:27:09] – Nick

She whacks Sabos on the back of the head with her blaster rifle [Laura: zank you] and it hurts real bad and she kind of, as you bend over and go ow! she like-


[00:27:18] – Steven

my poor head tail absorbs the blow.


[00:27:20] – Nick

  1. She boots you like in the butt. And you stumble forward into the clearing. She says Please move and leave your guns in the pile by the- by the lamp and she like steps back out of range to cover you. And as Sabos goes stumbling in the officer that’s there goes Ahhhh and like puts the bar down and looks around. He still hasn’t noticed anyone outside the clearing, he only see Sabos.


[00:27:43] – Laura

Okay so Xianna puts her gun down. But just kind of like has her hand by her side. Because it doesn’t really look like there’s anything in her coat because it doesn’t really look like there’s pockets.


[00:27:55] – Nick

Makes sense. She didn’t try to search you


[00:27:57] – Laura

And her utility belt doesn’t really have anything on it.


[00:28:01] – Steven

I kind of have to disarm my blaster rifle because I don’t think it’s non-obvious.


[00:28:07] – Nick

No, it’s huge.


[00:28:07] – Steven

Yeah but I’mma keep my vibro knife


[00:28:08] – Laura

Well, like do you have your vibro knife hidden?


[00:28:13] – Steven

Yes. Not on my belt, it’s like in my pants.


[00:28:16] – Laura

Why do you keep a knife in your pants?


[00:28:19] – Steven



[00:28:19] – Cameron

For situations like this Xianna!


[00:28:21] – Steven

-it was the only place I had to keep it. I don’t think Sabos [becomes too quiet to hear]


[00:28:24] – Laura

You don’t have like boots or something?


[00:28:26] – Cameron

No. His knife is strapped to his fourth headtail.


[00:28:30] – Laura

Hhhmmmm [Steven: that’s definitely not it] [group laughs] I mean you could strap it to the underside?


[00:28:35] – Cameron

Yeah, so you couldn’t see it from the outside.


[00:28:37] – Nick

He touches it too much. He started that but he kept cutting his fingers, do.


[00:28:40] – Cameron

Well you put it in a sheath


[00:28:40] – Steven



[00:28:43] – Laura

I also like that you act like your fourth headtail is like the only one back there when you would have like the third and fourth ones evenly spaced in the back.


[00:28:52] – Steven

It’s the one I give the most attention to.


[00:28:54] – Cameron

How do you know which one is your fourth one?


[00:28:56] – Laura



[00:28:56] – Steven

The one everyone else doesn’t have.


[00:28:58] – Cameron

Yeah. But so like, but so like [Laura: you have two!] everyone normally has, most Togrutans normally have like one coming over each shoulder and then the one in the back. You have two in the back. Is it the left or the right one [Steven: right one] that’s the fourth one? How do you know that though?


[00:29:08] – Laura

[Overlapping Cameron] Or is- or is it kind of like when people have like a third nipple?


[00:29:10] – Steven



[00:29:11] – Laura

And so like the fourth one is really tiny and weird looking. [Cameron laughs] So you know that’s the third-the fourth one.


[00:29:17] – Nick

I’ve always-


[00:29:17] – Steven

It’s adequate.


[00:29:19] – Nick

I’ve been picturing it is it like just kind of branches off of the main back one,is just kind of juggly. [group laughs]


[00:29:26] – Laura

No. I’m picturing like a stubby little extra one.


[00:29:29] – Steven



[00:29:31] – Laura

Maybe with like a tooth or something on it because it was definitely absorbed from a second- like from a twin, that you ate in the womb.


[00:29:38] – Steven

Just like my hands, everything up there is just fine.


[00:29:41] – Hudson

Now Sabos, you could get in to the adult entertainment industry with that fourth headtail. [group laughs]


[00:29:45] – Laura

Ok, anyways. [group laughs]


[00:29:47] – Nick

And we’re back! [rewind sound effect]


[00:29:49] – Laura

Xianna, yeah, walks into the clearing but kind of keeps her hands nonchalantly by her sides.


[00:29:54] – Nick



[00:29:55] – Laura

She doesn’t like put them up or anything.


[00:29:56] – Nick

So you drop a pistol in the pile of- there’s, so there’s already a little pile of the like the Stormtrooper E-11 blasters on the ground and you look back behind you and you see the storm trooper lady like gesture towards the pile you drop your pistol down. Sabos you put your rifle there and you go in the clearing. What do Karma and Tink do?


[00:30:19] – Hudson

I put my vibro axe down but do not reveal my grenades.


[00:30:24] – Nick

Are they in your fanny pack?


[00:30:26] – Hudson

They’re on my strap, but yeah in my fanny pack.


[00:30:29] – Nick

Cause I know you have like a backpack and a utility belt but your utility belt for whatever reason I’m picturing is just a fanny pack.


[00:30:36] – Hudson

Well yeah it kind of is actually. Look at my picture.


[00:30:38] – Nick

Oh maybe that’s why I’m picturing that.



[overlapping Nick] I’m imagining it has like little pockets.


[00:30:42] – Hudson



[00:30:43] – Laura

Like there’s some little pouches on it instead of just being…


[00:30:46] – Cameron

it’s like a cool thing.


[00:30:47] – Laura



[00:30:47] – Hudson

It goes across and around.


[00:30:49] – Cameron

It’s a utility fanny pack.


[00:30:50] – Nick



[00:30:51] – Laura

Because it also doubles as a little holder for his vibro-axe in the back.


[00:30:57] – Nick

Okay so


[00:30:58] – Hudson

I don’t take that off I just-


[00:30:59] – Nick

You drop the obvious weapons and Karma? Cameron’s got a look on her face she’s about to do something.


[00:31:04] – Cameron

Well so I walk out. I detach the light blasters that I have on both hips first.


[00:31:12] – Nick



[00:31:13] – Cameron

And then to remove my blaster carbine I have to take it off my back and swivel it around to the front and as I do that I’m going to shoot the dude.


[00:31:21] – Nick

Okay I need a cool check to see if you can do that before anybody gets the drop on you.


[00:31:28] – Cameron

Cool. [whispers] I’m fine with that.


[00:31:29] – Nick

The bounty hunter knows never disarm and go change locations.


[00:31:33] – Cameron

I’ll change locations, but I’m not taking all my guns and stuff and I still have my vibro-sword.


[00:31:37] – Laura

Yeah that’s why you don’t take off all your weapons.


[00:31:40] – Cameron

I took off the two that I’m not good with which is the light blasters.


[00:31:44] – Nick



[00:31:45] – Cameron

To make it look like I was complying up until the point where I am shooting the dude. It’s an average? or no, it’s a cool check, nevermind. That’s just a cool check.


[00:31:59] – Cameron

[dice sounds] 2 successes.


[00:31:59] – Nick



[00:32:00] – Cameron

What do they have?


[00:32:01] – Nick

So the guy is freaking useless he is just one green die, I just want to see if he sees anything.


[00:32:07] – Cameron

One success.


[00:32:07] – Nick

Good for him. And then lady is two greens and a yellow. [dice sounds]


[00:32:14] – Nick

I should call them by name but you don’t know that [mumbles]


[00:32:16] – Cameron

Three successes and an advantage.


[00:32:18] – Nick

Three successes and an advantage, which does make sense thematically since she’s had a gun aimed at you. You are going to get that shot off but as she sees you do it you hear her very emotionally go No. And she goes to shoot you. So that is going to be two greens and a yellow with an average difficulty please. But I’m going to give her a blue die because she was aiming at you.


[00:32:42] – Laura

Xianna is just over here like shaking her head and like rolling her eyes like you wait until they are not looking at you. That is when you shoot them.


[00:32:51] – Cameron

My gun is on stun.


[00:32:53] – Nick

Okay good to know.


[00:32:53] – Cameron

Because that’s its default setting.


[00:32:55] – Nick

Her’s isn’t.


[00:32:57] – Cameron

That’s fine. I’ve just- sense I’m also going to shoot the dude.


[00:32:59] – Laura

At this point Xianna does have her hands in her pockets.


[00:33:03] – Cameron



[00:33:06] – Nick

So this is all- this is all happening very quickly. This is going to be the beginning of an exchange.


[00:33:11] – Cameron

Two successes and an advantage.


[00:33:13] – Nick

Okay, so hers does 8 because you wouldn’t have noticed but there’s some spores growing in it, when you’re out in the jungle players.


[00:33:23] – Cameron

[whispers] well you always clean your gun.


[00:33:23] – Nick

So eight, and you said it was three successes?


[00:33:25] – Cameron

Two success.


[00:33:26] – Nick

Two successes so that’s 10 damage.


[00:33:28] – Cameron

And I soak 5 of it.


[00:33:29] – Nick

Oh wow, okay, I forgot you have like armor and stuff.


[00:33:33] – Cameron



[00:33:34] – Nick

And are strong.


[00:33:35] – Cameron

Muy stronk.


[00:33:35] – Nick

You rotate your rifle around and snap up for a shot right before you pull- right before you pull the trigger you get, you take a pretty good hit in the back. Your armor absorbs most of that but you, having been shot multiple times in the past are very aware that you have been hurt and then before anything else happens you’re able to pull the trigger and shoot at our good army officer friend. So that’s going to be an average difficulty because you are very close. But it’s also going to be a black die because you were getting shot while you pulled the trigger.


[00:34:12] – Cameron

[dice sounds] A success.


[00:34:13] – Nick

A success.


[00:34:15] – Cameron

So that’s 10 stun damage.


[00:34:17] – Nick

10 stun so you blow him backwards off of the stool he was sitting on. He doesn’t, uh, go completely unconscious but he looks extremely fazed by that. What a great pun. But he starts to sit up a little and now I guess I need initiative rolls out of everybody, so that’ll be vigilance because now shit’s gone down. You had, what, two successes?


[00:34:42] – Cameron



[00:34:43] – Nick

Do you want to just use that as your initiative roll? Or do you want to roll again.


[00:34:48] – Hudson

I rolled one success.


[00:34:49] – Cameron

I’m good with two successes.


[00:34:50] – Laura

Two successes.


[00:34:52] – Steven

[overlapping Laura] I rolled one success.


[00:34:53] – Nick

[dice sounds] Okay. He had one success and she had what? Three.


[00:34:58] – Cameron



[00:34:58] – Nick

OK I’m going to make her roll again because she used her thing up.


[00:35:01] – Cameron

That was two yellows and a gree. [dice sounds] Two successes, a triumph and two advantages.


[00:35:08] – Nick



[00:35:09] – Cameron

I liked her other roll better. Can you use that one?


[00:35:10] – Nick

The Triumph include the- or did you include the success [Cameron: Yes, yes] as well?


[00:35:15] – Laura

It was a triumph with success and a success.


[00:35:18] – Nick

So she’s going to go first… Lira, and then 2 PC slots and then, so that was the two successes?


[00:35:28] – Laura



[00:35:29] – Nick

And then what?


[00:35:30] – Laura

They each got one.


[00:35:31] – Cameron

The boys had one.


[00:35:32] – Nick

They each had one? So it will be, we’ll make the NPC slot next and then it will be two PC slots. So Lira shoots you in the back. You stumble. She sees you shoot her… her good good buddy. And she says this is why we should have kept moving. And she shoots at you again, Karma. So same role as last time but she’s going to use her maneuver to aim.


[00:35:59] – Cameron

[dice sounds] I remembered what the dice were. That is- holy shit.


[00:36:04] – Nick



[00:36:05] – Cameron

That’s three successes and four advantages.


[00:36:08] – Nick

Four advantages, so she’s going to pull the trigger shoot you in the back again. So that’s 11 damage coming at you. So she hits you, the blast reflects off a piece of the paneling in your armor and starts bouncing around the clearing and a comical ricochet moment. And everybody kind of ducks. So it’s distracting and you guys will all have a black die on your next checks that you do. So everybody make sure you have a black die. And that was her. Karma, how are you doing?


[00:36:40] – Cameron

I have three health.


[00:36:42] – Nick

So not great


[00:36:44] – Cameron

Not great, I’m fine.


[00:36:46] – Nick

Is Karma the kind of person who is calm under this sort of pressure?


[00:36:48] – Cameron

[overlapping Nick] Yeah I’m fine.


[00:36:49] – Nick


[00:36:50] – Cameron

I’ve had worse.


[00:36:51] – Nick

  1. So that was Lira, two PC slots, who wants to go?


[00:36:56] – Laura

Hey, how close are you to her?


[00:36:59] – Cameron

So if she was following me to the weapons thing, [Nick: she’s probably-] then I’m- I’m probably short range.


[00:37:05] – Nick

I’ve been treating it medium range. [Cameron: Ok] She was trying to stay out [Cameron: Ok] of, stay out of range.


[00:37:09] – Cameron

[overlapping Nick] Medium, medium range.


[00:37:10] – Laura

Oh. Is anyone within short range of her?


[00:37:14] – Nick

No they’re- they’re all ahead.


[00:37:17] – Laura



[00:37:17] – Hudson

I know what you’re thinking.


[00:37:19] – Laura

I pull out a grenade [groups laughs] and I throw it at her.


[00:37:23] – Nick



[00:37:24] – Laura

Which is Range Light. So I’m going to throw the grenade, yell fire in the hole, and then jump away. [dice sounds]


[00:37:40] – Nick

Great. Thank you black die for keeping my NPCs alive he said angrily at the blank die.


[00:37:46] – Laura

So three successes and an advantage is not enough to do the blast, I don’t think. So that’d be 11 damage.


[00:37:56] – Nick

OOooohooo. OK. So you basically bounce the grenade off her chest and it goes off immediately and blows a hole in that chest plate that she had. You can spend those advantages that her armor is going to be a lot less for the rest of that fight.


[00:38:11] – Laura

Yes please.


[00:38:12] – Nick

I figured you would want to do that and she is in bad shape, she-


[00:38:16] – Cameron

Never take off the armor.


[00:38:18] – Nick

Okay so the grenade goes off and blows a big chunk of her armor off. She basically just has the arm plates on now and some- it does that broken plastic splintered look on the armor but most of it’s gone and she has her rifle still up but is leaning against a tree and holding her side. So she’s shooting one handed now. And that was real bad. Also part of the jungle is smoldering and you see like some columns of smoke rising. And another PC slot.


[00:38:46] – Hudson

I turn and I throw a grenade!


[00:38:49] – Nick

At- at Lira again?


[00:38:51] – Hudson



[00:38:51] – Nick

Ok that’s fine.


[00:38:55] – Hudson

So what would that be range light?


[00:38:56] – Cameron

[overlapping Hudson] range light.


[00:38:56] – Laura

Ranged light.


[00:38:57] – Hudson

Oh great. With the difficulty of hard?


[00:39:01] – Cameron



[00:39:01] – Laura



[00:39:01] – Nick

Yeah, just two.


[00:39:03] – Hudson

And a black die?


[00:39:03] – Cameron

[overlapping Hudson] with a black die.


[00:39:07] – Hudson

[dice sounds] Ooooh [Cameron: oh crap]


[00:39:09] – Laura



[00:39:10] – Hudson

Two disadvantages.


[00:39:12] – Laura

Two threats


[00:39:13] – Cameron

Two threats.


[00:39:14] – Nick

How do I want to play with thrown grenades being bad? Two?


[00:39:18] – Hudson

So no failures though.


[00:39:19] – Nick

But two threats?


[00:39:19] – Laura

[overlapping Nick] No, no no, by it being a wash you technically fail.


[00:39:22] – Hudson

Aah, true,.


[00:39:23] – Cameron

By not having any successes that still counted as a failure.


[00:39:26] – Nick

So your threats are going to be that it kicks up a lot of dust and when the dust clears you’re- it’s hard to see her, she’s dove into the bushes somewhere to get away from the explosions. So she’s going to be harder to track down but no one got exploded so that’s good. Grenade explodes in the bushes. So now it’s Williams’s’s turn and he kind of sits up he looks very dazed but he grabs for his pistol and he goes to shoot whoever is closest who would probably be Sabos because he was the first one into the clearing.


[00:40:04] – Steven



[00:40:04] – Nick

Yeah. So he’s- he yells Lira and takes a shot and it’s just two green die vs one purple die because they’re very close together.


[00:40:13] – Cameron

Does he also have a black die for the bullets flying everywhere?


[00:40:16] – Nick



[00:40:17] – Cameron

Okay he’s not ducking?


[00:40:18] – Nick



[00:40:19] – Cameron



[00:40:19] – Nick

He was already on the ground prone. [deep bass sound effect] Because you blast him off his chair, also, like if threats also affect your teammates they’re not as useful. So…


[00:40:29] – Cameron

[dice sounds] Right. Yes?


[00:40:31] – Nick

Yep. He’s not very good shooting.


[00:40:32] – Cameron

I kept forgetting.


[00:40:35] – Cameron

[dice sounds] yeah he’s not very good at shooting. It’s a failure and an advantage.


[00:40:38] – Nick

  1. So the advantage is- he shoots, misses wide, Sabos just kind of looks around like what? and then he rolls under the repulsor-sled and takes cover under there. So he uses his advantage to take some cover. And that was him. He’s not very good. And two more player slots.


[00:40:59] – Steven

Sure. Is it- I forget how the movement works.


[00:41:04] – Nick

You get a movement action.


[00:41:05] – Steven

Can I get close enough to under the sled they use the vibro-knife?


[00:41:09] – Nick

Yeah absolutely you can.


[00:41:11] – Steven

Okay, I’m going to run up under the slide just try to stab him with it.


[00:41:14] – Nick

OK go ahead.


[00:41:17] – Steven

[mumbles something] Oh actually have melee . Heyyy.


[00:41:18] – Cameron



[00:41:21] – Steven

Sure. How hard is it?


[00:41:23] – Cameron

Melee is always two. [Nick and Steven mumbling in the background]


[00:41:25] – Nick

But you’re going to have a black die because to get under there he’s prone [deep bass sound effect] so you run up and slide under with him. And then- but now you’re like laying next to someone, like with your head on your elbow.


[00:41:36] – Steven

I don’t really want to get under, I just kind of want to…


[00:41:39] – Nick

OK so laying-


[00:41:40] – Steven

I’ll take a black die


[00:41:41] – Nick

-laying prone and trying to like side-stabb at someone is a little bit harder


[00:41:44] – Steven

That’s fair. [dice sounds]


[00:41:51] – Cameron



[00:41:51] – Steven



[00:41:54] – Nick

A success.


[00:41:55] – Cameron

A success.


[00:41:55] – Laura



[00:41:56] – Nick

That does the weapon damage plus your brawn which is what?


[00:42:00] – Steven



[00:42:01] – Nick



[00:42:02] – Cameron



[00:42:02] – Steven

Plus one success.


[00:42:03] – Cameron



[00:42:04] – Nick

4 damage. Okay so you cut his arm pretty bad and he like retreats back under the sled like ahh. And then is just looking around. He’s panicking really hard. Karma, you’re up!


[00:42:14] – Cameron

Great. Alright, since chicky bird shot me twice I’d flip my blaster to kill


[00:42:21] – Nick



[00:42:22] – Cameron

The dude is ok still, still stun him. She’s going down. She shot me. So I have a black die from existing.


[00:42:30] – Nick



[00:42:30] – Cameron

Yeah. And then-


[00:42:32] – Nick

You gonna spend the maneuver to aim?


[00:42:35] – Cameron

I’m- for my maneuver, I’mma go take cover.


[00:42:37] – Nick



[00:42:37] – Cameron

Behind a tree.


[00:42:39] – Nick


[00:42:40] – Cameron

Specifically blocking her shot at me then I’m going to shoot at her. Is that average with 2 black die?


[00:42:47] – Nick



[00:42:48] – Cameron

Okay. I’m going to flip a light side point to upgrade, to shoot her gooder.


[00:42:59] – Cameron

[dice sounds] Glad that was useful.


[00:43:01] – Multiple Speakers



[00:43:04] – Cameron

Two failures. Two advantages.


[00:43:06] – Nick

Okay so you slam your back into a tree. You can feel your back bleeding and hitting up against the tree is uncomfortable but the cover is worth it. You lean around the corner and the Stormtrooper kind of peppers some blaster spray at you and you go back round the tree. You lean back around and take some shots but you guys are basically just shooting back and forth at each other. You don’t hit anything, you said you had some advantages?


[00:43:28] – Cameron

I have two advantages. I want to piss off the tree that she’s hiding behind and I want the tree to go after her.


[00:43:35] – Laura

Hey the trees are just supposedly maybe possibly sentient.


[00:43:42] – Cameron

[overlapping Laura] possibly eating people


[00:43:43] – Laura

or eating people.


[00:43:44] – Nick

Will you roll me one green die please for the tree’s initiative maybe possibly?


[00:43:52] – Laura

[dice sounds] one success.


[00:43:52] – Nick

Great. Hey, what a coincidence.


[00:43:55] – Cameron

That’s next.


[00:43:56] – Nick

Gonna go ahead and add the tree to the initiative order.


[00:43:59] – Laura



[00:44:00] – Cameron

Possibly. [Laura: it’s-] Who knows.


[00:44:01] – Nick

Maybe possibly.


[00:44:01] – Laura

It’s not confirmed.


[00:44:03] – Nick

It’s a rumor that the trees exist.


[00:44:05] – Laura

It is an urban legend.


[00:44:06] – Nick



[00:44:07] – Cameron

I don’t think it’s a rumor the trees exist.


[00:44:09] – Laura

Yeah the trees exist.


[00:44:09] – Cameron

[overlapping Laura] the tree- It’s definitely there.


[00:44:11] – Laura

It’s a rumor that they eat people.


[00:44:13] – Nick

So describe to me how you shooting at the tree might make it aggressive.


[00:44:17] – Cameron

So [Laura: she shoots it] we’ve felt exchanging fire back and forth.


[00:44:21] – Nick



[00:44:22] – Cameron

I keep shooting the tree right next to where she is and it has decided, supposedly decided-


[00:44:30] – Nick



[00:44:30] – Cameron

Allegedly that- that there’s something on that spot that is hurting it, that it needs to go after.


[00:44:37] – Nick

Okay so it’s the trees turn, [Cameron and Nick laugh] you don’t- we don’t even roll for this tree, it’s a thing of- it’s a- like a piece of environment. So the bark peels back up and it’s like these long ropey-like spikes you see them basically just rearrange and there’s a crunch and then Lira stops shooting. There is no more noise coming from behind the tree. That’s the trees turn and then the tree- the roots start pulling out of the ground and it starts like spaghetti legging away into the- into the brush and you see Lira with a bunch of stab wounds on her just laying on the ground bleeding and that tree just starts knocking other trees out of the way and wandering off and it makes it does the like groaning ship noise and cracking wood as it- as it disappears.


[00:45:30] – Multiple Speakers

[creaking noises] aaaahhhhhhhhh


[00:45:33] – Nick

Great. OK. Yeah. So Lira is down. She is not moving anymore and it was her turn but she’s down. So we got a PC slot. All that’s left is Williams hiding under the sled, bleeding looking very close to being unconscious.


[00:45:46] – Steven

Yeah, I’m going to stab Mr Williams again.


[00:45:49] – Nick

All right. You go right ahead.


[00:45:52] – Steven

Or- or, can I drag him out?


[00:45:55] – Nick

Yeah you can try. You can make me a brawl check.


[00:45:57] – Steven

Sure. How hard is it?


[00:46:00] – Cameron

Brawl is always two. [Steven mumbles in background] Like melee.


[00:46:03] – Nick

Well for this one it will be contested because you’re trying to like wrestle him out so he only has one green in brawn.


[00:46:09] – Cameron

So one purple.


[00:46:10] – Laura

One purple.


[00:46:10] – Nick

Yeah. He’s not very good at things.


[00:46:15] – Laura

Poor guy.


[00:46:20] – Steven

A success and an advantage.


[00:46:22] – Nick

Yeah. So you’re able to kind of like grab him around the scruff and he tries to slap you away and you just drag him out from cover and he’s kind of kicking and screaming like where’s Lira? what are you doing.? Ahhhh! Next PC slot.


[00:46:34] – Laura

So Lira’s dead-dead or just out. Did we-


[00:46:39] – Nick

She’s down.


[00:46:40] – Cameron

[overlapping Nick] She’s down.


[00:46:41] – Nick

She is down. [Laura: she is down.] She has multiple stab wounds and she has been exploded.


[00:46:44] – Laura

Yeah. So she’s more- most likely dead or-


[00:46:49] – Cameron

Mostly dead.


[00:46:49] – Laura

Or mostly dead.


[00:46:50] – Nick

Your experience would prove to you that it be very rare for someone to survive something like that.


[00:46:54] – Laura

Okay. I’m going to go over to Sabos and Williams and take out binders and slap them on Williams.


[00:47:02] – Nick

OK you don’t have to roll for that he’s pretty freakin’ out of it. So you’ve got him locked up.


[00:47:08] – Hudson

We can figure out why they ran in the first place.


[00:47:11] – Cameron

I sling my blaster back around my back take out my vibro-sword and walk over to Lira.


[00:47:16] – Laura



[00:47:16] – Cameron

and check her pluse.


[00:47:17] – Laura

They were lovers. I feel like that was obvious? And I look at Williams and I’m like you two, you were, how do you say… banging? Yes?


[00:47:28] – Nick

He’s just crying like [Laua: Yes] silent tears.


[00:47:31] – Laura

I’m going to take that as a yes. I believe they were lovers.


[00:47:34] – Nick

You check Lira, she is dead. She is no more. Most of her insides are on her outsides. That tree messed her up real good. At this point Mills jumps out of the opposite side of the clearing and’s like Alright I’m ready to go


[00:47:50] – Laura

Thank you. You were a very big help.


[00:47:53] – Nick

Well, I held some of the trees back. So at least we had that. My job was just to keep you alive not to capture anyone. So oh hey that was Lira. Wow that’s crazy. And he just- he goes- he walks across the clearing to her and looks down and goes man, she owed me 10 credits and just he sets about basically packing up the camp to take it with him.


[00:48:14] – Laura

[overlapping Nick] You could check her pockets.


[00:48:16] – Cameron

Yeah I’m going to.


[00:48:17] – Nick

I mean, it’s sort of, my culture frowns on that kind of thing, so.


[00:48:21] – Cameron

I check her pockets. Okay I make eye contact with him as he says my culture frowned on this and I look down and start checking her pockets.


[00:48:27] – Nick

Okay you- you find ten credits.


[00:48:31] – Cameron

I hand them to him.


[00:48:32] – Nick

Hey thanks. Now I owe you ten credits. And he pockets it.


[00:48:36] – Cameron

That- that definitely how that works.


[00:48:38] – Laura

[overlapping Cameron] Yes, that is how it works. You owe us 10 credits now.


[00:48:41] – Nick

And William says are you done robbing my friend? What are you even doing?


[00:48:48] – Laura

Friend or was she not girlfriend? or partner? However you wanted to label it?


[00:48:54] – Nick

Look we didn’t we didn’t like labels okay. We were just trying to go. We were just trying to leave and then getting hunted by your co-workers is really crazy and Lira just started becoming one with the jungle or whatever but like she was really, she- Oh gosh it’s was and he breaks down and cry.


[00:49:15] – Cameron

[overlapping Nick] I continue that the tree did get her.


[00:49:15] – Steven

That’s true.


[00:49:18] – Laura

The tree.


[00:49:20] – Cameron



[00:49:21] – Laura

I mean I did throw a grenade at her. But… the tree.


[00:49:26] – Nick

Look I guess nothing really matters. We were just trying to get to different outposts and get off planet. But maybe that was just wishful thinking. I’m imagining Falx’s sent you after me. He always has his weird smuggler friends do stuff like this. Well, get it over with and he just kind of like closes his eyes and puts his head to the side.


[00:49:48] – Cameron

Why are you trying to get away?


[00:49:51] – Nick

We just di-


[00:49:51] – Cameron

 Well, were. Why were you trying.


[00:49:53] – Laura

Xianna like leans in and she’s like have you seen the empire?


[00:49:58] – Nick

I mean she’s got a point, it basically is one of those “have you seen the empire” kind of things.


[00:50:02] – Cameron

I have but have you not seen how brainwashed everyone is in the empire?They’re very good at that. [Laura: ehhh] The defecting is rare.


[00:50:11] – Laura

They are OK.


[00:50:12] – Cameron

The people being controlled by the empire. Yeah. Those running make sense. People within their organization normally very much drinking the space-koolaid.


[00:50:22] – Laura

In my experience there’s not a lot of deserting because the empire gets everyone in one way or another. Eventually. It’s hard to run from a regime that has the entire galaxy.


[00:50:36] – Nick

That’s pretty morbid.


[00:50:39] – Laura



[00:50:39] – Nick

Uh well. Williams is like he’s- he’s got the binders on. He’s like trying to apply pressure to the knife wound in his arm.


[00:50:48] – Cameron

I lean down and help.


[00:50:49] – Nick

Oh thank- thank you.


[00:50:50] – Laura

Well I kind of- I lean down to Williams and go if we bring you back alive how badly will they torture you?


[00:50:58] – Nick

You know Falx doesn’t really go for torture that much, he’s sort of efficient like that. uh either I’ll get sent to a labor camp or if they don’t want to waste the food waiting for a shipment they’ll probably just shoot me. Honestly it’s weird that he didn’t just tell you to kill me.


[00:51:17] – Laura



[00:51:17] – Nick

This is a bummer. This was my first posting. I had such high hopes and now look at me.


[00:51:22] – Laura

That is why you do not desert. But so are you OK being sent back alive?


[00:51:29] – Nick

Yeah [Laura: okie] I guess it’s a 50/50 shot and I’ve always been pretty good at brown nosing that’s how I got here in the first place.


[00:51:36] – Laura

Cause like if they were going to horibly torture you I mean we could shoot you now.


[00:51:40] – Nick

It’s tempting. I mean you just murdered the woman I love, but.


[00:51:44] – Laura

I mean-


[00:51:44] – Cameron

I think you’ll find that was the tree.


[00:51:47] – Laura

I mean, I am sorry.


[00:51:48] – Cameron

And she did shoot me first. To be fair.


[00:51:51] – Laura

They would kind of probably kill us if we did not.


[00:51:54] – Nick

Yeah. I mean you’re dooming me to a life of slave labor at the best case scenario so you should feel bad about that. And I don’t appreciate it. There’s still a chance-


[00:52:03] – Laura

So do you want me to shoot you now? Cause like… I will.


[00:52:07] – Nick

No. I uh-you could like just let me go.


[00:52:08] – Laura

[overlapping Nick] You have a choice. OK. So here is the thing, if we let you go and I look over what’s his name Rambo dude?


[00:52:18] – Multiple Speakers



[00:52:18] – Laura

Mills It’s like Mills.. How close is Mills to us?


[00:52:22] – Nick

He’s still just kind of patrolling the perimeter. He can hear but you can’t tell if he’s paying attention or not.


[00:52:28] – Laura

So I want to kind of like whisper probably mostly to Karma and go like so is there any way we could you know act like a tree got him and just bring back Lira’s body and maybe a bloodied helmet or shirt and just you know say we saw him die?


[00:52:54] – Cameron

Probably? The thing with that though you, sweetie you look pretty banged up.


[00:53:00] – Nick



[00:53:00] – Laura

I have a stimpack.


[00:53:01] – Nick

He looks like suddenly hopeful, like surprised hopeful ,like a teenager who meets Santa Claus hopeful.I could- I can make it.


[00:53:09] – Cameron

Realistically hun…


[00:53:11] – Laura

Xianna looks at Karma-


[00:53:12] – Cameron

[overlapping Laura] I’m- I’m concerned with you lasting out here.


[00:53:13] – Laura

[overlapping Cameron] How- how many wounds does he have?


[00:53:15] – Nick



[00:53:16] – Laura

  1. I have a stimpack, so I could fix him up.


[00:53:21] – Nick

I like this plan. I mean you could tell I’m a- I don’t mean to brag– He tries to like brush his hair.


[00:53:27] – Laura

[overlapping Nick] Xianna like already has the stim pack out and is like watching Mills and shoots Williams up with it and like puts the empty one back in her pocket.


[00:53:38] – Nick

He- there’s a- he kind of gasps as the painkillers take effect. Well you know I am ruggedly handsome and independent. He is not ruggedly handsome or independent looking. This is a very scrawny junior officer [Laura: sure] just out of training.


[00:53:51] – Laura

[overlapping Nick] Yes. Sure you are.


[00:53:53] – Nick

But yeah I just- just- you could take one of the Stormtrooper bodies or something, [Laura: okie] we’re about the same level of ripped it should work.


[00:54:03] – Laura

Someone is going to have to go to distract  Mills and then I- we will make a bunch of noise over here-


[00:54:09] – Cameron

Sabos and Tink, y’all are distracting.


[00:54:11] – Laura

You go make distractions. Go, go.


[00:54:13] – Cameron

Go talk appropriately about your headtail or something


[00:54:15] – Steven

That was the plan!


[00:54:15] – Laura

Someone- one of you go and get in a tuffle with a tree. Try not to get actually killed.


[00:54:23] – Hudson

Hey Mills. I was wondering…


[00:54:27] – Nick

Yeah, what?


[00:54:28] – Hudson

You see that a lot of experience out here, what was one of your hardest fought battles that you’ve ever had?


[00:54:35] – Nick

Oh well let me tell you about it. There’s this one time I had a whole grove of trees between me and my sister and I was-


[00:54:41] – Hudson

Do tell.


[00:54:42] – Nick

I was trying to set her up with my friend.


[00:54:45] – Laura

That’s their distraction? This is just a story.


[00:54:48] – Cameron

As long as he’s facing away from us.


[00:54:51] – Nick

[overlapping Cameron] At his point Mills throws his arm around Tink which is mostly like up and points away from y’all to gesture broadly at the trees. There is a couple of spruces and two jungle deciduous and I was able to take them down with an incendiary grenade and he just goes on and on about killing trees,


[00:55:05] – Laura

[overlapping Nick] So while they’re doing this Xianna gets Williams up to his feet, takes off the binders, put them back in her pocket and I mean he’s not wearing any like uni- is he wearing anything that Mills would have seen on him to identify?


[00:55:20] – Cameron

He’s a- he is wearing like the army uniform right?


[00:55:23] – Nick

So he has like one of the little blue squares because he’s like a super junior officer.


[00:55:27] – Laura

[overlapping Nick] Xiana goes over and like plucks the little blue square off of him.


[00:55:31] – Cameron

Make sure there’s blood on it.


[00:55:33] – Laura

And kind of like rub that on his leg a little bit-


[00:55:35] – Cameron

way more convincing [Laura: to get more blood].


[00:55:36] – Laura

Does he still have his cap or anything?


[00:55:38] – Nick



[00:55:39] – Laura



[00:55:40] – Nick

He doesn’t have his cap but his- his uniform is all like shredded you could pull pieces off if you wanted to.


[00:55:44] – Laura

[overlapping Nick] Yeah. So like she takes a few pieces and any like large thing. If he had a holster like takes that and then-


[00:55:52] – Nick

As you take his insignia he’s like Wait wait wait wait wait. And he goes over and he takes it from you and he does something you can’t tell. And the bottom pops open and he shakes something out of it and puts it in his pocket. Okay great thanks.


[00:56:05] – Cameron

The Karma starts we obviously can’t send him like we- we can’t let you keep the sled. I know it’d be useful but he has seen it. This is- yeah. So let’s pack you a bag.


[00:56:19] – Nick



[00:56:20] – Cameron

Some useful stuff.


[00:56:22] – Laura

So pack a bag very quickly and then we will have you hide off to the side and I will throw a grenade, sprinkle this stuff and a tree was getting you and you were getting away and so I panicked. And threw a greanade.


[00:56:35] – Nick

Great. Sounds awesome. And he basically just takes- there was a pile of those ration bars and he just takes one arm and brushes them into like a piece of cloth he makes into a satchel, ties it around the stick and just takes off into the trees. And at this point Mills has Tink by both shoulders and is shaking him and staring really close to his face and there were bug monkeys- bug monkeys everywhere!


[00:56:59] – Hudson

aaaaahhhhh. [groups laughs]


[00:57:01] – Laura

So Xianna-


[00:57:01] – Cameron

Karma does like accounting with their nature 1 2 and 3


[00:57:06] – Laura

And Xianna is like doing that little like face like okay and scene! and then like throws the grenade at a random tree and then it’s like oh shit! and then-


[00:57:19] – Cameron

Grab him!


[00:57:21] – Laura

-throws like right after the grenade throws all the scraps she took off of Williams and then falls back.


[00:57:28] – Cameron

We both fall back as if ahh! grenade explosion and it threw us!


[00:57:33] – Nick

So the camera cuts to Mills holding Tink and he’s staring at Tink but facing towards the explosion so you just see the cool grenade explosion silhouetting Mills and Tink and he goes oh what? He looks over and he sees it and goes what? What happened?


[00:57:51] – Laura

Oh I so the- the officer Williams he started getting away and then a tree started attacking and I panicked and I threw a grenade. I think I killed him.


[00:58:04] – Nick

I’m going to need a deception role from you.


[00:58:07] – Laura

Can do!


[00:58:08] – Nick

Against, I guess it would be his perception.


[00:58:12] – Laura

Which would be?


[00:58:13] – Nick

A purple and a red. Actually two purples, nevermind. Mills is good at seeing.


[00:58:18] – Cameron

Can I- can I- can I assist?


[00:58:20] – Nick



[00:58:21] – Cameron

Since I’m acting with it.


[00:58:22] – Nick

Is your…


[00:58:22] – Cameron

I think it’s the same.


[00:58:24] – Nick

If it’s the same she just gets-


[00:58:25] – Cameron

[overlapping Nick] So you- you have more cunning. But we both have one deception.


[00:58:28] – Nick



[00:58:28] – Laura

I have two deception.


[00:58:29] – Nick

So yeah you just add a [Cameron: a blue?] blue die then.


[00:58:33] – Cameron

[dice sounds] I’m like walking over and like carefully walking towards and picking up scrap pieces of things.


[00:58:42] – Laura

One success and two advantages.


[00:58:44] – Nick

Okay so with the success Mills goes Oh well, I mean, he’s dead I guess that’s what’s important. It saves us the blaster charges. We’re just going to put him down.


[00:58:59] – Laura

I am sorry.


[00:59:00] – Nick

Well you know, you- you Twi’leks are- I have zero experience with them but I have now decided that they’re bloodthirsty so great work.


[00:59:10] – Laura

I panicked! It was scary. The big tree.


[00:59:13] – Nick

I think I saw a holo of Twi’leks with sharp teeth one time, it’s always kind of…


[00:59:16] – Laura

That is just the men.


[00:59:19] – Nick

Oh well yeah.


[00:59:21] – Laura

It is considered attractive


[00:59:22] – Cameron

Is it?


[00:59:23] – Nick

Do you think I should file my teeth?


[00:59:25] – Laura

No. It just for the Twi’lek men that it’s attractive.


[00:59:29] – Nick



[00:59:30] – Cameron

So it’s attractive to other Twi’lek men or Twi’lek women?


[00:59:32] – Laura

Well I mean if they are of that orientation yes. It is interactive for the men to have pointy teeth.


[00:59:38] – Nick

I don’t know why we’re talking about this. You just blew someone up. That’s good to know. Thank you for expanding my cultural horizons. I appreciate that. [Laura: yes] And just scrape that stuff into a bag or whatever we’ll put it on the sled bring it back to Falx and he turns around leaving. He’s been digging through the cart for a couple of minutes and he pulls out this big spray bottle. It looks like a cockroach bomb like just an aerosol thing with the dispersal things like oh man they did manage to get one of these and he takes a metal spike out of his pocket and jam it into the top and it starts misting all everywhere. He goes that’ll take care of the trees. And you see them actually start to spread back in clearways, it will be a lot easier getting back. Let’s us


[01:00:20] – Cameron



[01:00:22] – Laura

What is this planet?


[01:00:24] – Nick

Let’s try and get back to the outpost.


[01:00:25] – Cameron

So I have collected the bits of Williams’s uniform. That Xianna had thrown in one hand and then I walked over and I hoist Lira up over my shoulder and tossed her onto the sled.


[01:00:38] – Nick

She does a rag doll form that’s pretty gross and starts dripping into the supplies a little.


[01:00:44] – Cameron

I kind of shift- well uh- I put her on, not like on food stuffs.


[01:00:48] – Nick


[01:00:49] – Cameron

I shift uncomfortably and kind of wipe the blood off of my shoulder and then remember that my- the adrenaline starts to wear out. And I leaned against the sled and like put my hands on my knees like whoa.


[01:01:00] – Nick

Mills- Mills sees you doing that like great. That way we don’t have to carry her. You got shot a lot.


[01:01:08] – Cameron

I noticed.


[01:01:09] – Laura

Oh yes. So do they have an infirmary at the outpost?


[01:01:14] – Nick

Yeah they have that. But I also have some medical supplies in the speeder that we could use.


[01:01:20] – Laura

[overlapping Nick] Okay. I do not want to waste my stimpack.


[01:01:21] – Cameron

  1. So before we head out I’mma make a- I’m gonna make a cool check to try and recover some strain and I’m going to use my hardboiled talent. So when I’m recovering strain after an encounter I can spend advantages of two ranks in hardboiled to recover one wound per advantage spent, so I could heal one wound back this way.


[01:01:39] – Nick

Just one?


[01:01:40] – Cameron



[01:01:41] – Nick



[01:01:41] – Cameron

May spend advantage up to ranks in hardboiled. So


[01:01:43] – Nick

Okay. Well.


[01:01:44] – Cameron

That is one.


[01:01:45] – Nick

Hopefully you get an advantage.


[01:01:46] – Cameron

Hopefully I get an advantage because I didn’t lose any strain. What’s the difficulty?


[01:01:50] – Laura



[01:01:51] – Cameron

Simple? Fabulous. [dice sounds] Hey that’s an advantage.


[01:01:55] – Nick

Got a wound back and 2 strain.


[01:01:57] – Cameron

I wasn’t the one strained- or I didn’t lose any strain but I’m up to four health now.


[01:02:03] – Nick

Good work. So you make get back to the speeder without any crazy things happening and you pile in, you toss Lira’s body into the trunk. There’s still some space back there and you drive off into the jungle. Headed back towards the outpost and that’s where we’ll end the episode!


[01:02:21] – Nick



[01:02:21] – Cameron



[01:02:21] – Multiple Speakers



[01:02:27] – Cameron

Oh dear.



Thanks for listening to Tabletop Squadron. If you enjoyed our show please consider logging into iTunes and giving us a five star review. Five star reviews will help new listeners to find the show.



Xianna’fan is played by Laura Penrod. She can be found on Twitter at Cheerio_buffet.



Tink is played by Hudson Jameson and he can be found on Twitter at HudsonJameson.



Karma Nailo is played by me, Cameron Robertson. You can find me on Twitter at MidnightMusic13.



Sabos Niks was played by Steven Schroeder. He does not exist on the internet.



Our game master is Nick Robertson and you can find him on Twitter at alias58. Our intro song is Space Jam by Pablo Ribot. Additional music by James Gunter.



Follow the podcast on Twitter and Instagram at tabletop_squad. For real we’re real people and we want to talk to anyone who listens to the show. Reach out. See you next time.



The Ithorian Bellows! Ordered by members of the crew while at the Gooberfish. It was described as a creamy blue-green drink in a tall glass. With it being summer and ridiculously hot where we are (it’s suppose to be 100F/37.8C later this week) we decided to go tropical.


This delicious drink combines coconut milk drink, coconut rum, blue curaçao, and lime juice (with a little bit of food coloring). It’s sweet, but not overly, with a tang of citrus, and a wonderful creaminess from the coconut. 


The mocktail version is just as good. The rum is replaced by a tiny bit of coconut extract and the blue curaçao with orange juice and blue food coloring. We made both versions and both were gone within minutes. 


A small note to make: this drink uses coconut milk drink, the kind in a carton sold with the other dairy alternatives, not the canned variety. However, if your store doesn’t sell coconut milk drink you can make canned coconut milk work. Make sure to shake the can very well and then combine it with 28 ounces (3.5 cups) of water, a pinch of salt, and 1-4 teaspoons sugar or other sweetener.



While not described as having a little umbrella, we felt like they made sense. If we ever do a full retcon, the first thing we’ll do is add more cocktail umbrellas.


Ithorian Bellows [serves 1] 

8 ounces coconut milk drink (or other dairy alternative, or dairy)
2 ounces coconut rum
1 ounce blue curaçao
1 ounce fresh lime juice
1 small drop green food coloring*

Combine all ingredients in a shaker with ice and shake well. Strain in a highball glass.


Ithorian Bellows Mocktail [serves 1] 

11 ounces coconut milk drink (or other dairy alternative, or dairy)
1 ounce fresh lime juice
1/2 ounce orange juice
1/4 teaspoon-1/2 teaspoon coconut extract
2 drops blue food coloring*
1 small drop green food coloring*

Combine all ingredients in a shaker with ice and shake well. Strain in a highball glass.


*We used a store-brand gel food coloring. Depending on what type and brand you use, you may need to use more.

While this soup never actually appears in the show, we know, deep down in our hearts, that Quiggle would absolutely have crew dinners and continue his famous alliteration with them. Thus, we created Quiggle’s Calamari Quadretti Zuppa, an Italian inspired soup with squid and small, square pasta.

And yeah… Quiggle’s Calamari Quadretti Zuppa isn’t actually alliteration, but Q words are hard, okay?

Quiggle’s Calamari Quadretti Zuppa


This one pot soup is surprisingly easy. Onion, garlic, and red pepper flakes are sauteed in olive oil, then white wine is added and reduced, stock and tomatoes are thrown in, then the pasta and calamari is added. It takes an hour or less and is delicious.

Serve this with a crusty loaf of bread, or maybe some garlic bread if you’re feeling extra fancy,


Some of the ingredients laid out


In a dutch oven or some sort of large saucepan heat some olive oil over medium-low heat. Add the onion and cook, stirring often so it doesn’t brown, about 3-5 minutes. The onions should be soft and translucent. Add the garlic and red pepper flakes, cook for an additional 1-2 minutes, until fragrant.

Add the wine and stir. Bring to a simmer and let the wine reduce by half. This will burn off some of the wine (but not all! Replace with more stock if you need it completely alcohol-free), and create a more concentrated flavor.

Onions being cooked. Garlic being cooked. Wine being reduced.




Pour in the tomatoes and stock. Turn the heat up to medium and bring to a simmer. Let cook, stirring occasionally, for 15 minutes to let the onions soften even more and to let the flavors meld together.

If using fresh pasta, add the quadretti pasta and calamari. Let cook for 3-5 minutes, until the pasta is cooked and the calamari is tender.

If using dried pasta, add the pasta. Let cook until al dente. Add the calamari and cook for 3-5 minutes, until tender.

We used fresh, handmade quadretti pasta. But don’t worry, almost any small pasta will work.

Tomatoes and stock being simmered. Pasta and calamari added.



Season with plenty of salt and pepper and serve garnished with parsley and with some crusty bread on the side.

Quiggle’s Calamari Quadretti Zuppa


Quiggle’s Calamari Quadretti Zuppa

2 tablespoons olive oil
6 cloves garlic; diced
1 small yellow onion; chopped
1/2-1 teaspoon red pepper flakes
1 cup Pinot Grigio or any dry white wine
28 ounces crushed tomatoes
2 cups chicken or seafood stock
Salt and pepper; to taste
8 ounces quadretti pasta (or another small soup pasta)
1 pound calamari; body sliced into rings and tentacles chopped into pieces
1 tablespoon fresh parsley, chopped
Crusty Italian bread for serving

Heat the oil in a dutch oven or large saucepan over medium-low heat. Add the onion and cook, stirring often, until translucent, but not browned, about 3-5 minutes. Add the garlic and red pepper flakes, cook for an additional 1-2 minutes, until fragrant.

Add the wine and stir. Bring to a simmer and let the wine reduce by half.

Pour in the tomatoes and stock. Turn the heat up to medium and bring to a simmer. Let cook, stirring occasionally, for 15 minutes.

If using fresh pasta, add the quadretti pasta and calamari. Let cook for 3-5 minutes, until the pasta is cooked and the calamari is tender.

If using dried pasta, add the pasta. Let cook until al dente. Add the calamari and cook for 3-5 minutes, until tender.

Season with salt and pepper.

Serve warm garnished with parsley and bread.




Bantha Cakes were first found in the cabinets of the Afternoon Delight by Xianna in episode 7 (well… listeners will hear about them first during the Jedi Adventures part 2, but we first created them in ep7). They described as processed snack cakes and the squadron immediately thought of Zebra Cakes… but blue. So not surprisingly, the classic Little Debbie snacks were a heavy inspiration for these cakes. A yellow cake, a whipped cream filling, a poured frosting, and a drizzle on top.  We decided upon almond-white chocolate as the flavor and tinted the frosting and filling to that wonderful shade of Bantha milk blue.

Bantha Cake cross section


First, let’s start with the cake. The recipe we use is a fairly standard yellow cake recipe that uses buttermilk to keep the cake extra moist. Once the cake is baked and cooled, you’ll a 3-inch round cutter to cut out 16 to 20 round pieces. How many pieces you’ll get will depend on if your cutter is exactly 3 inches or not.

Cake pieces being cut out


Next comes the whipped cream filling. The special ingredient in the filling is dry milk powder. It adds extra body to the whipped cream and makes it more stable. This helps prevent the whipped cream from melting at room temperature.

You’ll divide the filling evenly between half of the cake pieces. Then place the remaining cake pieces on top to create a “sandwich”. You may not use all of the filling. Don’t worry. Any extra can be eaten with the extra cake pieces. We’re not saying that we smushed handfuls of cake and filling into our mouths like a bunch of toddlers, but… wait- nevermind. We are saying we did that.

Cake pieces and frosting assembly process




Once the cakes are made and sitting in the fridge, you’ll start the fondant coating. It’s made in a double-boiler, which is a metal bowl placed atop a saucepan with an inch or two of boiling water. This means the steam is what’s heating up the fondant instead of the stove directly. It’s a more gentle way to heat things up, and helps prevent anything from burning or cooking unevenly.

The initial mix is powdered sugar, corn syrup, more blue food coloring, flavoring, and a bit of water. Once it’s fully heated through and mixed you’ll turn off the stove and add the white chocolate chips. Stir until everything is combined, and then it’s time to pour!

Using a ladle or large spoon you’ll pour the fondant over the chilled cakes. Any gaps or bumps can be smoothed out with a butter knife or the back of a spoon. Do this immediately after pouring, before the fondant has time to set.

Fondant being poured over the cakes



The final step is the white chocolate drizzle. You’ll melt white chocolate in the microwave in small increments (to prevent burning), and then using a spoon drizzle it on top of the cakes.

And there you have it, Bantha Cakes!

Bantha Cakes with white chocolate drizzle



Tabletop One’s Tips:

  • Buttermilk can be substituted by adding 1 tablespoon lemon juice to a measuring cup, and then pouring whole milk to reach the 1 cup mark. Let sit for 10 minutes.
  • If your cake top puffs up and is rounded after baking use a bread/cake knife to even the top out.
  • If your double broiler or bowl is not large enough to hold 12 cups of powdered sugar, make the fondant in two batches.
  • Make sure the bowl you use to melt the chocolate is completely dry. Any amount of moisture can make the chocolate seize and become clumpy.


Bantha Cakes [makes 8-10 large cakes]

1 recipe Vanilla Cakes (recipe to follow)
1 recipe Whipped Cream Frosting  (recipe to follow)
1 recipe Poured White Chocolate Fondant  (recipe to follow)
1/2 cup white chocolate chips

Using a 3-inch round cookie or biscuit cutter and cut out rounds from the cakes. You should get between 16 and 20, depending on how close to 3 inches your cutter is.

Place large dollops of the whipped cream frosting on 10 of the cake rounds. Smooth out the frosting. Place the remaining ten rounds on top.

Place the cakes on a rack over a baking tray. Put in the refrigerator while you make the fondant.

While the fondant is still warm, begin to pour the fondant over the cake rounds. If the fondant becomes stiff and less pourable, place it back on the heat for a few minutes. Continue until the cake rounds have been fully covered. The fondant recipe makes quite a bit, and there will probably be excess. If needed, you can scoop up the fondant that has collected on the tray and stir it back into the fondant in the double-boiler.

Place the chocolate chips in a microwave safe bowl. Microwave for 30 seconds. Stir. Microwave for 15 second intervals, stirring in between, until the white chocolate is fully melted. Drizzle over the cakes.

Let the cakes sit for at least an half an hour to allow the frosting to set.



Vanilla Cakes [makes 2 9″x13″ cakes]

2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour (312 grams)
2 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
4 large eggs
1 1/2 cup sugar (300 grams)
2 teaspoons almond extract
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 cup canola oil
1 cup full-fat buttermilk

Preheat the oven to 350°F and line two 9″x13″ pans with parchment paper.

In a medium bowl, whisk together cake flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt. Set aside.

In the bowl of an electric mixer, beat eggs with the whisk attachment on medium speed for 15-20 seconds. Add sugar and continue to beat on medium speed for 30 seconds. Add vanilla and oil and beat on medium speed for 1 minute. Reduce mixer speed to medium/low and slowly add about half of the flour mixture. Add half of the buttermilk, then the rest of the flour mix and the rest of the milk. Beat until just combined and smooth, scraping down the sides of the mixing bowl. The batter should be thin.

Pour batter evenly between the two pans. Bake for about 15 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean. If cooking the cakes on different racks in the oven, switch them halfway through to promote more even cooking. 


Whipped Cream Frosting

1 cup heavy whipping cream
1/2 cup powdered sugar
1/2 teaspoon almond extract
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 tablespoon nonfat powdered milk or nonfat instant dry milk
Blue food coloring

In a mixing bowl combine the cream, powdered sugar, milk powder, extracts, and powdered milk.
Whip until the cream begins to thicken. Add the food coloring until a bright, light blue shade is achieved. I used 6 drops of Blue and 2 drops of Teal, both Wilton gel food colors. Continue to whip until the frosting is thick and holds its shape.

Poured White Chocolate Fondant

6 cups powdered sugar (720 grams)
1/2 cup water
2 tablespoons light corn syrup
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 teaspoon almond extract
Blue food coloring
3/4 cup white chocolate chips

Bring a pot of water to boil, then placing a larger metal bowl or double-boiler over it.

In the bowl, whisk together the powdered sugar, water, corn syrup and extracts. Add the food coloring until a bright, light blue shade is achieved. I used 4 drops of Blue and 1 drop of Teal, both Wilton gel food colors.

Continue whisking until the mixture becomes smooth. It should be thin enough to drizzle from a spoon. If using a food thermometer, the temperature should reach 95°F.

Turn off the heat, add in the white chocolate chips and stir until fully melted.


Bantha Cakes with Jawas. Because we had them out at the time and didn’t have bantha figures.


Word document download: Episode 4 A Monkey On Your Front

PDF download: Episode 4 A Monkey On Your Front

Read in browser:

Episode 4- A Monkey On Your Front

The transcription provided have been created through a mix of software and manual editing. We have tried our best to indicate overlapping speech, cross-party talk, and interruptions. “In character” speech has been italicized as best as possible. Laura’s character Xianna’fan speaks in somewhat of a French accent. We have done our best to represent that in text.

We apologize for any misspellings or mistakes. Please send any corrections, comments, or concerns to tabletopsquadron@gmail.com



[00:00:18] – Nick

[background guitar music]

Hi everyone and welcome to Tabletop Squadron, a Star Wars Edge of the Empire actual play podcast. I’m Nick, your gamemaster. Every other Thursday our story follows a thief, a bounty hunter, a fringer and a slicer as they explore the galaxy helping a mysterious benefactor and each other. Additional music this week is Stjepan Major by Peglica i Komandos. Before we start I want to take a second to thank everyone for their 5star iTunes reviews. I’m talking to you Little Raley and you Scarbane. Special shout out to MiteyMights, directorspy. You’re a wonderful person. Leggd, go to Starbucks and tell them Tabletop Squadron says you deserve a macchiato. WesternShadow, thank you for your enthusiasm, and TheBrokenLegacy, may your dice ever roll triumphs. If you’re keeping count that’s seven reviews. We only need 3 more to unlock super secret art. It’s a lot of fun and we’ll post it all over social media. So if you like us head on over there and tell the iTunes community… maybe tell a friend. Once we hit this milestone we’ll come up with something else to bribe you into telling people about the show. So if you like content, review our show. Anyway onto the episode.


[00:01:40] – Nick

Hello and welcome to Episode 4 of Tabletop Squadron I’m your host and gamemaster, Nick. We’re gonna go around the table introduce yourselves and say who you are playing.


[00:01:50] – Laura

Hi I’m Laura and I play Xianna’fan.


[00:01:52] – Hudson

I’m Hudson and I play Tink.


[00:01:55] – Steven

I’m not Hudson. I’m actually Steven and I play Sabos Niks. [Nick: for real?]


[00:02:01] – Laura

I’m also not Steven. Wow.


[00:02:03] – Steven

[Cameron: you’re not Hudson either] I am Steven! [Hudson: woowww]


[00:02:05] – Laura

and I’m also not Hudson!


[00:02:06] – Steven

Yeah. Me neither. [Hudson: woowwww]


[00:02:07] – Laura

I’m definitely not Hudson


[00:02:09] – Steven



[00:02:09] – Cameron

Anyway, I’m Cameron [laughs] and I’m playing Karma


[00:02:12] – Laura

I am also Cameron though. [group laughter] I’m not Steven or Hudson, but I am also [Steven: i am in fact Cameron] Cameron.


[00:02:20] – Nick

And now let’s roll our destiny points. I got it right. Oh. [dice sounds]


[00:02:26] – Cameron

Good job. One dark side. bad job. [dice sounds]


[00:02:30] – Steven

Two light side. [Cameron: heeyyyyy] white side.


[00:02:33] – Laura

One dark side


[00:02:33] – Hudson

Two light side.


[00:02:38] – Laura

We did so well


[00:02:39] – Cameron

Four the light side, two dark side.


[00:02:42] – Nick

All right so when we last left off. You all had been given a rare moment of privacy and relaxation in your garden shed and-


[00:02:52] – Steven

Guest quarters.


[00:02:53] – Nick

Guest quarters and had been -um- bedding down for the evening. And we’ll- we’ll open it up there.


[00:02:59] – Laura

Xianna immediately sees that it’s two bunk beds and yells out top bunk! I call ze top bunk!


[00:03:06] – Steven

Which one?


[00:03:07] – Laura

Zeee right side. yes


[00:03:09] – Cameron

[overlapping Laura] I just go and climb on the top bunk on the left.


[00:03:11] – Steven



[00:03:12] – Hudson

I take the bottom bunk. That’s what I wanted anyway


[00:03:14] – Steven

[overlapping Hudson] I take the bottom bunk ’cause it’s what’s left.


[00:03:17] – Hudson

I’m a bit heavy


[00:03:18] – Cameron

And so I look around and I notice that there are no cameras or recording equipment or anything in here.


[00:03:24] – Laura

Xianna [Nick: pass that check] would like poke her head upside down and look at Tink and be like Tink do you like being ze bottom? [group laughter] and is like smiling and just staring at him.


[00:03:37] – Hudson

I kind of crumple up my face and I don’t respond.


[00:03:40] – Laura

I like twist over and look at Sabos, and go Sabos! Do you like being ze bottom?


[00:03:45] – Steven

I am on the bottom.


[00:03:47] – Laura

Do you like being on ze bottom?


[00:03:50] – Steven

I mean I’d prefer the top but I’ll take bottom. [group laughter]


[00:03:54] – Laura

Xianna just keeps laughing and sits back up and is very proud of herself.


[00:03:59] – Hudson

Sounds like he’ll take whatever he can get.


[00:04:01] – Laura

She is very amused with this.


[00:04:03] – Cameron

So I’m- I’m sitting on the edge of the top bunk. I have my feet swinging very much in Sabos’s area. Not purposely trying to hit him but also since he’s on the bottom bunk there’s just not a lot of space there.


[00:04:16] – Steven

Not trying not to hit me either though.


[00:04:18] – Cameron

Not trying not- not trying to hit you but also not really caring if you choose to put your face in the way of my foot. [group laughter]


[00:04:27] – Steven

Oh [Cameron: yeah] cool.


[00:04:29] – Cameron

So Togrutan.


[00:04:31] – Steven

Nautolan. [Cameron laughs]


[00:04:33] – Laura

Again! What is with you two?


[00:04:37] – Cameron

I- He introduced himself as Togrutan so I’m going with it.


[00:04:40] – Steven



[00:04:42] – Cameron

Nope. You’re Togrutan. Why are you here?


[00:04:46] – Steven

-uh- Well I’m from a- a small outpost on -uh- you know, Osiron. Not the Togrutan homeworld. [Cameron: okay] [Laura: But- ] We want to -uh- you know we’re seeking to establish trade routes throughout the galaxy, we’re trying to be independent of the home world. [Cameron: -mhhmm-] First Togrutans to branch out and -uh-  I was told that if I were to -uh- you know, help someone scratch their back they could scratch mine, if you will.


[00:05:13] – Cameron

That does nothing to explain to me why you’re here.


[00:05:16] – Laura

[overlapping Cameron] Yes, zat makes no sense.


[00:05:18] – Cameron

Who’s back where are you trying to scratch?


[00:05:20] – Steven

Oh you know the Corellian.


[00:05:21] – Cameron

the Corellian?


[00:05:22] – Laura

[overlapping Cameron] the Corellian?


[00:05:23] – Steven



[00:05:23] – Cameron

Did this Corellian have a name or did you just see what [Steven: -uuuuh- Sako] they looked like and just want it -oh- So Sacko, -oh- so the one who was supposed to be with us.


[00:05:31] – Steven

Yes that’s right.


[00:05:33] – Cameron



[00:05:33] – Steven

I was told if I do some of his bidding he might help me establish some routes between -uh Osiron and -uh- Corellia.


[00:05:40] – Cameron



[00:05:40] – Steven



[00:05:41] – Cameron

so- so we’ve seen your vast expertise at astrogation [Steven: yes] and piloting.


[00:05:48] – Steven



[00:05:49] – Cameron

-umm- Do you have any actual skills?


[00:05:52] – Steven

Well I am an expert at astrogation and piloting. I like to think I’m a skilled negotiator.


[00:05:58] – Cameron

You like to think or you are?


[00:06:01] – Steven

I’m a good pilot aren’t I?


[00:06:02] – Cameron



[00:06:03] – Steven

I negotiate as well as I pilot.


[00:06:05] – Laura



[00:06:06] – Cameron

Oh great.


[00:06:06] – Steven

All I have- Okay okay.


[00:06:09] – Laura

You should not talk when


[00:06:10] – Steven

[overlapping Laura] We didn’t hit the trees okay. That’s [Laura: that’s what we- did we not?] how my negotiating works.


[00:06:13] – Cameron

That was [Laura: we did] not you! That was me!


[00:06:17] – Steven

I astrogated that.


[00:06:18] – Cameron

Yeah, you astrogated to the trees.


[00:06:20] – Steven

That’s right. I wanted to test your skills. Why are you here?


[00:06:24] – Cameron

Because I was hired for bounty hunter job because I’m a bounty hunter. And I brought in my mark very quickly and efficiently.


[00:06:31] – Steven

So why are you still here?


[00:06:33] – Laura

Because money!


[00:06:33] – Cameron

[overlapping Laura] Well I’m being paid for a job. [Steven: mhhm-] I don’t know if you are. Sacko might be being paid for this job.


[00:06:39] – Steven

Someone is getting paid.


[00:06:40] – Cameron



[00:06:41] – Laura

I do not zink zat someone is you zough.


[00:06:43] – Steven

I’m getting paid in trade routes.


[00:06:45] – Laura

So nooo. [Cameron: okay] Zat is not money


[00:06:50] – Steven

And in credits.


[00:06:51] – Laura

Zat is money. I do not zink you are getting zose credits zough.


[00:06:56] – Steven

[overlapping Laura] Credits aren’t as important on Osiron.


[00:06:58] – Laura

Is it a [Cameron whispers something. possibly: something’s getting at me] trade based society?


[00:07:02] – Steven

It’s- it’s more of a hunter gatherer society. So we’re trying to


[00:07:06] – Cameron and Laura

trade based?


[00:07:07] – Laura

trade based.


[00:07:08] – Steven

Trying to make it into more of a modern…


[00:07:11] – Laura

So zen [Steven: sort, almost like the homeworld ] you want ze money..


[00:07:13] – Cameron

So you’d need, so-


[00:07:14] – Steven

Trade routes.


[00:07:15] – Cameron

So, so, so wait. So you’re branching out from the homeworld to become a different group of Togrutans [Steven: No no no, we had just been there first] and are tryingto make it so that the current society more reflects the homeworld. So why [Steven: uh no. no] did you leave? That is what you said.


[00:07:33] – Steven

Well there’s a lot of group think that goes on in the Togrutan culture. -uh- Us on our colony aren’t as -uh- groupy.


[00:07:41] – Laura

Xianna like pops back down… like upside down and looks at Tink and goes zat is going nowhere and I do not zink he knows what he is talking about. What is your deal? You are big and furry.


[00:07:54] – Hudson

Now that I’ve gotten to know you a little bit, what do you- what do you want to know? What do you mean my-


[00:07:58] – Laura

like. Like.. what is [Steven: top or bottom?] your deal?


[00:08:02] – Hudson

Well as a child, or how far back? How far back do we need to go here?


[00:08:06] – Cameron

[laughing] I was born on a Tuesday.


[00:08:08] – Hudson



[00:08:08] – Laura

Just like a general…. what is your zing? Who do you like?


[00:08:12] – Hudson

[overlapping Laura] Well if you haven’t noticed my [Laura: what is-] thing is slicing. I’m wery very good at it. That’s why I got picked up for the job. One of the best in the land actually.


[00:08:20] – Laura



[00:08:20] – Hudson

And Corellia.


[00:08:22] – Laura



[00:08:23] – Hudson



[00:08:23] – Laura

Anything else?


[00:08:25] – Hudson

Well -uh- I wasn’t, you know, I did learn computers in an empire run school -uh- one time but you can’t really trust the empire, I found out and so I ditched that and since then I’ve just been kind of learning on my own, making my own way.


[00:08:41] – Laura

Where is your ‘ome? You say imperial but I-


[00:08:44] – Hudson

So I was on Mandalore as a child but for the longest


[00:08:49] – Laura

[overlapping Hudson] [whispers] you do not look Mandalorian.


[00:08:51] – Cameron

They normally don’t have quite as much hair.


[00:08:53] – Laura

Usually zey are just ‘umans.


[00:08:55] – Hudson

Well my parents were brought there as slaves. Thank you very much if you [Cameron: ohh] had to [Laura: oh] know. I’m from the original home of Gigor which is where my race is from but then they got sent to Mandalore as slaves before they were freed by Duchesse Satine. So there’s- there’s my story.


[00:09:15] – Laura

Cool! I was just curious-


[00:09:16] – Hudson

What’s your deal?


[00:09:16] – Steven



[00:09:17] – Laura

I steal zings. [Cameron laughs]


[00:09:20] – Hudson

Steal things.


[00:09:21] – Laura

I am versatile….Also, how open are you to a- a threesome with ze Zabrak? He seemed interested. I just want to make sure, you know, keep zings open and just incase. I do not zink we will have to but you know, on ze off chance zat zis will make zings easier or if zings get weird.


[00:09:43] – Cameron

Karma rolls over so that her head’s now hanging over the bed and just kind of like stares at Sabos uncomfortably.


[00:09:49] – Hudson

You know-


[00:09:50] – Cameron

And all my head tails just kind of fall around.


[00:09:52] – Steven

I like clear her tentacles and stare uncomfortably back.


[00:09:55] – Hudson

There was this one time back in college. Things just kind of got weird, I had a lot of wine and so I mean if- if things happen they happen is what I say. I- I try to go with the flow cautiously [Laura: okie] and I seem [Laura: just checking] to think that you know…


[00:10:12] – Laura

Again I do not zink it is going to ‘appen. You know, just checking all ze options.


[00:10:18] – Hudson

Well thank- thank you for your communication.


[00:10:20] – Laura

I mean… okie. 


[00:10:22] – Steven

Seems like everyone is open to it here,  so I think y’all are


[00:10:25] – Cameron

Wait, what?


[00:10:25] – Hudson

No one even asked you.


[00:10:27] – Laura

No one asked you Sabos. No one asked you.


[00:10:30] – Steven

I didn’t mean me, I’m- I’m-


[00:10:32] – Laura

Well obviously.


[00:10:33] – Steven

I’m not in y’alls bunk.


[00:10:34] – Cameron



[00:10:35] – Laura

You are on zat side of ze room.


[00:10:36] – Cameron

So everyone– [Laura: zis side of ze-] so everyone refer to that bunk.


[00:10:38] – Laura

Zis is the cool bunk. You are ze not cool bunk.


[00:10:42] – Steven

I’m an ambasador.


[00:10:42] – Laura

No you’re not.


[00:10:44] – Steven

I’m too good for that.


[00:10:45] – Laura

I do not zink you are an official ambasador.


[00:10:47] – Steven

Look at my badge. I hold up the badge.


[00:10:50] – Laura

Does zat say Sakos?


[00:10:51] – Steven

No. This says Sabos. This is the Osiron official


[00:10:55] – Laura

[overlapping Steven] which does it say?


[00:10:56] – Nick

So it says Sabos on it, describe your Osiron ambassador’s badge.


[00:11:01] – Steven

It has a picture of Osiron. So basically just a circle with an orange- an orange circle and it says Sabos Niks and a picture of me with my thumb up and under it it says Ambassador.


[00:11:18] – Laura

Zat looks fake


[00:11:19] – Steven

It’s laminated! [group laughter]


[00:11:22] – Laura

Zat looks more fake zen ze fake badges I make.


[00:11:24] – Steven

[overlapping Laura] as I said we don’t have many sources on Osiron.


[00:11:27] – Laura

Also, why is zere just an orange blob? Zat could be anyzing.


[00:11:31] – Steven

That’s Osiron.


[00:11:32] – Laura

I mean again it could be anyzing… so it is fake!?


[00:11:36] – Steven

No this is the official ambassador badge of Osiron. I know because I am the official ambassador.


[00:11:43] – Laura

-Mmmmmm- [Cameron: okay] if you say so.


[00:11:45] – Steven

If you could make a better badge


[00:11:47] – Laura

I mean maybe.


[00:11:48] – Steven

We- we Togrutans on Osiron might have need for your services.


[00:11:51] – Laura

I do not ‘ave a laminater machine with me.


[00:11:55] – Steven

Eh, we can work that out.


[00:11:56] – Nick

So as you continue to discuss for a few hours the camera pulls back. The sun is set You hear night life in the jungle and as the camera pulls away from the outpost you see patrols going around on the exterior and there’s a side wipe it goes -swwooop- across and then suddenly you’re zoomed back in on the outside of your guest quarters and it’s daytime, early morning.


[00:12:24] – Hudson

I yawn as I wake up.


[00:12:25] – Steven

I sit up ambasador-ly.


[00:12:27] – Nick

So there’s a brief shot of you all waking up and then another wipe. Maybe this one’s a star wipe we’ll just get ridiculous with it and you are all geared up and walking into the square in the middle of Outpost 4 and you see one of the off-road speeders that was on the expedition yesterday and Mills, the large guy with dark lanky hair and scars is throwing some crates of supplies into a trunk on the back. The speeder now that you get a closer look it hovers but also has like skids on the bottom for sudden changes like fallen tree trunks and underbrush and things and it looks like it sees 6 people it’s got 3 2-person benches and then a large crate strapped to the back that works as like a trunk and he’s putting stuff into that crate back there. Yeah. So as you walk up he waves at you and says Good morning.


[00:13:22] – Steven

Howdy [Cameron whispers: good morning] Mills


[00:13:22] – Laura



[00:13:24] – Hudson



[00:13:25] – Laura

Xianna’s not [Cameron whispers: Xianna doesn’t do mornings?] a morning person. She’s still kind of like half asleep and she’s probably like leaning against whoever is right next to her and then kind of doing like the jerk where like No, I’m – I am awake. I am awake.


[00:13:35] – Steven

Mills do we happen to know the description of the men we’re looking forward today?


[00:13:42] – Nick

Well there’s a couple of them. Their names are Lira and Williams. One of them’s a storm trooper and the other one’s a officer.


[00:13:53] – Cameron

Which one is the trooper?


[00:13:55] – Nick



[00:13:56] – Hudson

Are they in love?


[00:13:58] – Nick

I…. I don’t care. My job is to go get them.


[00:14:01] – Hudson

So you’ll be joining us?


[00:14:02] – Nick

Yeah I’ll be your guide. I guess. I was supposed to keep an eye on you. Falx presumably trusts you which makes no sense but the money is good. And this is a lot more comfortable than where we used to live with all those beasts about. So I’ll take you wherever you need to go but it’s going to probably be an hour or so before we -uh- we’re- we’re ready to leave the speeders still charging so if there’s anything you need to take care of before you go now would be the time.


[00:14:32] – Hudson

[Cameron mutters something] bathroom break


[00:14:33] – Nick



[00:14:34] – Hudson



[00:14:34] – Laura

Did you- We literally just left. Did you not go?


[00:14:39] – Hudson

Well- I have to go a lot when I first wake up. [group laughter]


[00:14:44] – Nick

Mill’s is like no no no not here not here in the square. There is a barracks bathroom over there.


[00:14:48] – Hudson

Oh okay.


[00:14:49] – Steven

I turn around so I cannot be seen by Kaarma and clean my weapon and prepare it.


[00:14:54] – Laura

[whispers] why..


[00:14:55] – Nick

Eww [Cameron laughs]


[00:14:55] – Laura

why, why do you-


[00:14:56] – Steven

[overlapping Laura] I was giving Karma crap about cleaning the- the bug guts. [Nick: oh! you’re actual weapon] Yes.


[00:15:01] – Cameron

His actual weapon. And now you’re really [Steven: my blaster!] regretting not cleaning it yesterday.


[00:15:05] – Laura

why do you… you clean your weapon at night. Why would you do it right now?


[00:15:10] – Steven

I’m not getting my weapon dammit. I like run off.


[00:15:13] – Laura



[00:15:13] – Cameron

Karma turns as she hears Xianna say this.


[00:15:17] – Nick

So as they all kind of scatter Mills looks at Xianna and Karma who are still there and says well if I’ve got basic supplies but if you need anything specifically for the jungle there’s a quartermaster off the square over there and he points [Cameron: fabulous] across the square.


[00:15:32] – Laura

Zank you.


[00:15:33] – Cameron

[overlapping Laura] I’mma go that way.


[00:15:34] – Laura

I go that way as well.


[00:15:36] – Nick

Okey dokey. So you see the building that he pointed out across the way it looks like a very small shack on the other side of the square so most of these buildings are probably 2, 3… or like between 500 and a thousand square feet. So like general cabin size this one looks like an outhouse. And as you come up to it it’s a another like concrete building but it’s got one of the Star Wars doors on it so it’s swooshes open and you see that it actually leads to just a staircase going down. The quartermaster is actually stationed in a basement dug into the ground. So as you go down the stairs the walls are all dirt crisscrossed with dura-steel beams to keep the area stable and there is a steel cage that takes up about two thirds of this basement with a bunch of crates of supplies behind it and there is a board looking human behind a glass window. He’s bald with graying short cropped hair on the sides and eyes bug out of his face his belly presses against the desk in front of him. He makes eye contact with you but says nothing.


[00:16:38] – Cameron

Hey hun, do you have any vibroswords?


[00:16:42] – Nick

Yeahhh. What… who.. Do you have an order issuing you a vibrant sword? They don’t just give those out.


[00:16:50] – Cameron

No, I’m wanting to purchase one, we’re about to leave on an expedition for Falx.


[00:16:55] – Nick

Ahh- Shh- vibr- yeah. If you’re working for him I guess I can explain the inventory later, charge you, I don’t know, throw out a number. Normally I don’t have to do this. Uhhh- seven hundred and fifty credits? The exact going rate for a vibro sword.


[00:17:13] – Cameron

I was seeing if I had negotiation but I don’t yet. So.


[00:17:16] – Nick



[00:17:16] – Cameron



[00:17:17] – Nick

So you hand him some credits because Star Wars is super vague about what that looks like depending on what it is.


[00:17:23] – Cameron

[overlapping Nick] It’s like two and a half blocks of credits.


[00:17:26] – Nick

Yeah those weird-


[00:17:27] – Laura

[overlapping Nick] or maybe just one stick? I don’t know.


[00:17:29] – Nick

Gold bars but sometimes they’re flash drives. Yes. So you have a Vibert sword. It’s not super fancy. It’s got like a tape grip on it but it looks pretty much like fresh out of a box. Just think they bought the cheapest functioning one that they could.


[00:17:45] – Cameron

I go- I go through the ones that they have and like slash with them and stuff to get the one that has the best feel.


[00:17:52] – Nick

  1. They’re all identical but one of them feels like it was wrapped a little bit better.


[00:17:56] – Cameron

Cool. I take that one.


[00:17:57] – Nick

The guy behind the counter after you’ve asked for the third one is starting to look really annoyed. Look they’re all the same. Just take one. I don’t know [Cameron: the one-] what you’re doing.


[00:18:05] – Cameron

The one that he hands me that time I do a more flashy slash with and go a little bit closer to him than I had been doing so that he backs off.


[00:18:15] – Nick

Yeah he shuts up but also does not change his posture at all so-


[00:18:19] – Cameron

It’s fine I just want him to stop talking.


[00:18:20] – Laura

Xianna’s just gonna kind of smile and be like And do you have any grenades?


[00:18:26] – Nick

Is this a military outpost? Yeah. What do you want?


[00:18:30] – Laura

I know, but like do you just like give to me? I do not know ze rules ‘ere. I’m sorry.


[00:18:35] – Nick

Just. They cost money.


[00:18:37] – Laura

I know they cost the money.


[00:18:39] – Nick



[00:18:40] – Laura

But you seem to confused about how much it costs with her.


[00:18:42] – Nick

No I know things. I’m- I’m really good- I’m a good quartermaster. Yeah. We’ve got like all the grenades like half these boxes are probably grenades. That’s why we’re underground. It’s not like I could die or whatever.


[00:18:55] – Hudson

I’d like two grenades please.


[00:18:56] – Nick

Oh how- are you there now?


[00:18:58] – Cameron

Tink [Hudson: yeah!] says walking in from the bathroom.


[00:18:59] – Nick



[00:19:00] – Hudson

Yeah I’m done.


[00:19:02] – Nick

You’re- great. Some weird albino wookiee.


[00:19:07] – Hudson

Woooah! [Laura: excuse me!] I’ll take three grenades.


[00:19:10] – Nick

I don’t know how much grenades cost. How much do grendades cost?


[00:19:12] – Laura

[overlapping Nick] -uuhhhh- So I have knockout grenade listed as 120 but that’s not a regular grenade.


[00:19:18] – Nick

We’ll just do 120, that’s [Laura: okay] fine. so it’s 120 a pop. I’m sure they all cost slightly different but I don’t feel like looking it up so either I’m giving you a good deal or I’m ripping you off. I’m not sure but yeah you could. Do you want just like explode grenades?


[00:19:33] – Laura

I want ze exploding grenades


[00:19:35] – Hudson

Explode please.


[00:19:36] – Nick

Okay Wookiee guy. Here’s 3. He slides them, you give him money.


[00:19:41] – Laura

I want two please.


[00:19:43] – Nick

Okay here’s two. It’s fine. Wherever. Maybe I’ll even make sure the empire gets this money back. Doesn’t matter.


[00:19:50] – Steven

While they do that I finally finished cleaning my weapon, go to Mills, ask where everyone is and then join them in the…


[00:19:57] – Nick

So Mills looks [Steven: outpost] up from, he’s got a panel on the speeder open and a datapad plugged into it and he’s running some diagnostics and he looks up why you’re- not with everybody else. What are you even- they’re that way. Go to the outhouse looking building. We’re leaving in like 20 minutes. I hope you get your stuff together.


[00:20:16] – Steven



[00:20:17] – Nick

Okay. And then it cuts back to you walking down the stairs. So grenades and a sword. I’m sure you’re definitely going to want to use a sword against a Kersten’s beast. Yeah that’s a great idea.


[00:20:31] – Steven

Oooh I’ll have one of those swords.


[00:20:33] – Nick

You want a sword?


[00:20:34] – Steven

What did she get? I point to Karma.


[00:20:37] – Cameron

I slash the sword threateningly at him.


[00:20:39] – Steven

Yes, yes.


[00:20:41] – Nick

Sure, 750 credits and you-



[overlapping Steven] Oooo That’s pretty steep.


[00:20:46] – Nick

Yeah it is.


[00:20:46] – Cameron

The [Steven: I-]  going rate for [Steven: I-] a vibrosword.


[00:20:48] – Steven

I could negotiate here so I mean actually try to negotiate with them.


[00:20:51] – Nick



[00:20:51] – Steven

I’d like just a better price. I’m kind of aiming for 500 but if he wants to do better.


[00:20:58] – Nick

You’re aiming for 500? Okay


[00:20:59] – Steven

[overlapping Nick] Yeah, I want just a better price


[00:21:01] – Hudson

Get triple triumphs and you gotta [becomes too quiet to hear]


[00:21:02] – Nick

Okay roll your negotiation against his negotiation which is-


[00:21:06] – Steven



[00:21:07] – Nick

-a red and two purples.


[00:21:09] – Steven



[00:21:11] – Nick

and also you can have a black die because they’ve been irritating him this whole time.


[00:21:14] – Steven

No I’ll just not do that if that’s cool with you.


[00:21:17] – Nick

Is that one of your talents?


[00:21:18] – Steven



[00:21:18] – Laura

No, he flipped a-


[00:21:19] – Cameron

He flipped a lightside point Nick: Oooh] to not have to.


[00:21:21] – Nick

So you… that’s not what that does. You can upgrade [Steven: oh!] one of your greens to a yellow.


[00:21:25] – Steven

[overlapping Nick] Oh, well, never mind, we’ll- we can just put that back and I’ll see what my talents are. Let’s see. Street smarts or knowledge? That’s not that. Well fuck it. [dice sounds]


[00:21:34] – Nick



[00:21:35] – Steven

Black die. [dice sounds continue]


[00:21:37] – Nick

So if you flipped one it’ll give you- it’ll upgrade one of your greens to a yellow.


[00:21:41] – Steven



[00:21:41] – Nick

Or add a green if you have all yellows. [dice sounds continue to continue]


[00:21:45] – Steven



[00:21:45] – Laura

He’ll be fine.


[00:21:46] – Nick

Okay. [dice sounds finally end]


[00:21:50] – Steven

Or not.


[00:21:51] – Cameron



[00:21:53] – Nick

Oh woowww


[00:21:53] – Steven

That would be a fuck ton of, well-


[00:21:55] – Cameron

Two threats


[00:21:56] – Steven

Two threats. Yep.


[00:21:57] – Nick

All right


[00:21:58] – Steven

And nothing else that really happens.


[00:22:00] – Nick

Look, so I report to the Empire. I don’t have to do anything for you all.


[00:22:05] – Steven

Oh I understand. I’m not an imperial.


[00:22:07] – Nick

It’s time for you to stop talking now buddy. You can give me a thousand credits for this vibrosword or you can all get out.


[00:22:15] – Steven

750 sounds great.


[00:22:16] – Nick



[00:22:16] – Laura

Do not-


[00:22:17] – Nick

1,000 credits


[00:22:18] – Steven



[00:22:20] – Laura

Sabos… stop it. Has he given the rest of us our stuff already?


[00:22:25] – Nick

Yeah you guys already have your stuff.


[00:22:26] – Laura

[overlapping Nick] OK like Xianna has definitely already put the grenades like into her magical pockets and is like kind of backing up and like with Karma and Tink, being like [in a sing-song manner] we should goooo. We should go right now! Let’s go!


[00:22:41] – Cameron

I sheath my sword with a flourish and just turn in a swing of headtails and walk back up the stairs.


[00:22:48] – Steven



[00:22:48] – Nick

So it’s just him and Sabos left.


[00:22:51] – Steven

So a thousand’s not going to work. [group laughter]


[00:22:55] – Nick

You know it’s kind of weird that she didn’t have a sword. Right? He says pointing at Karma as she leaves, because like she’s obviously good with one but she didn’t have one. Are you good with a sword?


[00:23:07] – Steven



[00:23:08] – Nick

Okay so why won’t a thousand work? You broke?


[00:23:12] – Steven



[00:23:12] – Nick

You smugglers never have any actual money which is weird because you work in expensive stuff.


[00:23:16] – Steven

It’s a long trip out to Osiron.


[00:23:21] – Nick

Hmm. You got anything worth trading?


[00:23:23] – Steven

That’s a curious question. -Uhhhh- Unless you’re interested in macro binoculars I’m not entirely sure I got much for you.


[00:23:34] – Nick

How much money do you have?


[00:23:35] – Steven



[00:23:39] – Nick

Well I noticed you’ve got an extra head tail. I’ll take that.


[00:23:43] – Steven

Not sure I’m willing to part with my extra head tail.


[00:23:47] – Nick

That’s pretty inconvenient for you -huh-.


[00:23:50] – Steven

It certainly can be.


[00:23:52] – Nick

It’s weird having someone come into your personal space and immediately say that what is a part of you is not worth what you ask for isn’t it?


[00:24:00] – Steven

Is a vibrosword a part of you?


[00:24:02] – Nick

This is my inventory. I am the quartermaster.


[00:24:06] – Steven

Do you have any smaller cutting items like -[too muttered to hear].


[00:24:11] – Nick

I’ve got a vibroknife, give to you for 200 and your macro binoculars.


[00:24:17] – Steven

Well how about 250 and not the macro binoculars?


[00:24:21] – Nick

Yeah okay. I was just trying to be mean at this point but I want you to leave my thing now.


[00:24:25] – Steven

I’m cool with a knife.


[00:24:26] – Nick



[00:24:26] – Steven



[00:24:27] – Nick

You can have a vibroknife. I’m pretty sure I overcharged you like crazy for that but whatever.


[00:24:32] – Steven

That’ll work


[00:24:33] – Cameron

Ehh- they’re not cheap.


[00:24:34] – Nick

Yeah well or undercharge, this guy just wants him to go away. So you have a vibroknife.


[00:24:39] – Steven

Just tried to negotiate.


[00:24:40] – Nick

The stats are in the book.


[00:24:41] – Cameron

[whispers]  stats are right here.


[00:24:43] – Steven

Oh of course.


[00:24:46] – Nick

And we’ll do that of a scene transition where they shake hands over the vibroknife and the credits and it zooms in on their hands and then zooms out and everybody is in the speeder driving through the jungle. So OK so you’re in this speeder- Is- did anybody volunteer to drive?


[00:25:04] – Steven

Oh- I- yeah.


[00:25:05] – Hudson

I should drive. Wait, is there only one speeder for all of us?


[00:25:08] – Nick

Yeah. It’s like a six seater.


[00:25:10] – Steven

Oh yeah I’m going to drive.


[00:25:10] – Laura

Xianna would’ve immediately called for a center seat. She wants a middle seat.


[00:25:16] – Hudson

Wait whi-


[00:25:16] – Cameron

[overlapping Hudson] are they, I thought it was three rows of two seats.


[00:25:19] – Laura

Ohhh [Steven: I have piloting planetary] I heard two rows of three seats. Which one is it?


[00:25:22] – Nick

I- it’s- it’s three [Cameron: i think-] rows of two seats.


[00:25:26] – Laura



[00:25:27] – Steven

Okay.I- I’m just really confident in my abilities.


[00:25:31] – Hudson

-um- I’m going to take this one after the whole tree incident. So I pilot.


[00:25:36] – Steven

I do not concede.


[00:25:39] – Hudson

We roll chance cubes to settle this.


[00:25:41] – Nick



[00:25:42] – Laura

Xianna takes [Cameron: alright, well-] both of the backseats.


[00:25:44] – Cameron

[overlapping Laura] Roll- roll a force die.



[overlapping Cameron] Do you need to borrow mine?


[00:25:46] – Cameron

If it’s a light side then Tink drives. If it’s a dark side…


[00:25:51] – Steven

All right let’s do it. [dice sounds] Damn!


[00:25:54] – Cameron

Tink drives!


[00:25:55] – Hudson

Tink drives, light side!


[00:25:56] – Nick

and you owe him five credits! [group laughter] No. it’s just one side, I thought it was two light side. It’s like. Okay so yeah you pull out chance cubes immediately with a glint in your eye.


[00:26:06] – Hudson



[00:26:06] – Nick

and win the role. So you’re driving, Mills [Steven: I sit in the passenger seat] in the seat next to you.


[00:26:10] – Steven

No. No he’s not.


[00:26:13] – Nick

So we flashback to a scene of Mills getting into the passenger seat and you laying a hand on his chest like excuse me.


[00:26:19] – Steven

Chance cube.


[00:26:21] – Nick

Okay. [Cameron laughs] He’s like fine, we’ll roll of chance cube. I’m a gambler. Roll it.


[00:26:26] – Steven

Light I sit there?


[00:26:27] – Nick

Yeah. [dice sounds]


[00:26:29] – Steven

Damn it! [Cameron: dark side!] [group laughs] [Hudson mumbles something] I get in the back seat.


[00:26:32] – Nick

Mills is like fine gamble, it’s fine. It- I’m just supposed to kind of help you guys figure out where to go. No big deal. And you- you say well chance cubes and without even turning from the driver’s seat TinK holds up a cube you snatch it out his hand you roll it and you immediately lose. And Mills goes see? and so he’s in the second seat or in the passenger seat. In the second row. There is actually one other person. It is a imperial officer. He looks to be pretty young like fresh, pretty nervous. He introduced himself as Spark Deulsen. So the camera zooms around you’re all wearing like the helicopter earphones with the microphones. And he’s like oh boy I sure am glad we’re out here in the jungle.


[00:27:14] – Laura

Wait. How old is he?


[00:27:16] – Nick

Like 20 ish.


[00:27:17] – Laura



[00:27:18] – Cameron

Xianna 100- [Nick: a young 20] Xianna 100 percent’s sitting next to him.


[00:27:21] – Nick

[overlapping Cam] I don’t know why I did the Morty voice, okay?


[00:27:22] – Laura

[overlapping Nick] Xianna got into the back seat at first and her plan was to spread out and then she realized there was someone sitting there-


[00:27:29] – Cameron

Karma was climbing into the middle seat saw him and was like No. And got back down and then just stood next to Xianna [Laura: No, no, no] until Xianna got out.


[00:27:36] – Laura

Xianna is in the back seat but she’s in the back seat right behind him and is doing the like elbows on the back of his chair like leaning forward, be like Soooo


[00:27:49] – Nick

yeah. Which is funny too because you’re all connected with microphones so there’s no reason to do that. Oh wow that’s sure is exciting. I’m sure excited to go out on this mission. [Cameron, whispers:  so I get back in the jeep]Oh jeez. Spark Deulsen. He’s a petty officer and in– I specialize in communications.


[00:28:10] – Steven

Do you?


[00:28:11] – Nick



[00:28:11] – Laura

[overlapping Nick] Oh, zat is fascinating. Tell me more!


[00:28:14] – Nick

-Uh- And he blushes, says well, the funny thing is hyperspace communication. You think the higher frequency and the camera pans out but he keeps talking for quite a while.


[00:28:26] – Laura

No like straight up can I make a charm roll to see if he can just like keep talking and maybe accidentally say something he shouldn’t?


[00:28:32] – Nick

Sure. What a great idea.


[00:28:35] – Laura

What would the difficulty be?


[00:28:36] – Nick

Easy. Because he’s a turd. But two black die because you are driving fast. And also he doesn’t know a whole lot.


[00:28:45] – Laura

So then- how many?


[00:28:45] – Nick

Two black die. One because you’re on a speeder and the other because he doesn’t know that much useful stuff anyway. [dice sounds]


[00:28:54] – Laura

Two successes.


[00:28:55] – Nick

Huh yeah. Well you’d think the higher frequencies would be more important but actually the low frequencies are more important especially when we’re bypassing imperial code to try to get our smuggling equipment out. Oops. [group laughter]


[00:29:12] – Laura

-uhh- Where’s Tink sitting?


[00:29:13] – Cameron

Tinks driving.


[00:29:14] – Laura

Oh Tinks’s driving, so never mind but she does kind of like look over at Karma and wink and then go Oh. What? Why would you say oops? I did not hear anyzing. I am just so interested in what you are saying.


[00:29:27] – Nick

That’s good because if I let- let loose that the lower frequencies make it easier to bypass imperial codes so we could set our smugly equipment that would be really bad. Oops.


[00:29:41] – Laura

I do not understand.It is okay.


[00:29:43] – Nick

 maybe it’s like a nervous tick I just say oops sometimes I’m sure it won’t come up everything’s fine.


[00:29:48] – Laura

It is so cute. do not mind.


[00:29:51] – Nick

Aww you think I’m cute? He like clams up and blushes. He’s-


[00:29:54] – Cameron

Karma scoots over towards the wall a little bit more in their seat.


[00:30:01] – Nick



[00:30:01] – Cameron

She’s- she’s feeling awkward because he’s the same age as her sons. And she’s like ahhhh I don’t want to think about my kids doing this. I do not want my kids to meet Xianna.


[00:30:14] – Laura

Yeah Xianna’s- I mean Xianna’s like twenty three or twenty four.


[00:30:18] – Cameron

Yeah but you [Laura: so it’s not-] seem like real dangerous.


[00:30:22] – Laura

Oh yeah it is not good.


[00:30:26] – Nick

You drive your speeder for about an hour into the jungle and you come to a clearing and there’s some obvious blaster marks on some of the surrounding trees and some- like a fight has happened here and Mills signals for Tink to slow down and stop.


[00:30:43] – Hudson

I slow down and stop.


[00:30:44] – Nick

Great. Mills hops out with a -huuhh- action man noises and he’s carrying his stripped down blaster, he says this is where we lost track of the original party. We found two of them but three of them are still missing. Besides the deserters.


[00:30:58] – Hudson

Were the two found dead or alive?


[00:31:00] – Nick

They were pretty dead but I can’t tell if they got shot first or chewed on by some of the local flora and fauna first by the way some of the plants also eat because I said flora and fauna.


[00:31:11] – Cameron

[whispers] Yeah the flora kinda of freaked me out. [Steven and Hudson murmur in the background]


[00:31:11] – Laura

Zat is… concerning.


[00:31:15] – Nick

As he says that you hear this weird creaking noise from a tree. He goes not today. He shoots it twice and the tree goes still. That’s right. That’s where these scars are from and he points to some big long ones on his chest.


[00:31:29] – Laura

A tree? [Cameron: wow] Really? Okie, yes.


[00:31:32] – Cameron

Don’t touch trees.


[00:31:33] – Laura

Do [Nick: basically-] not touch ze trees.


[00:31:34] – Nick

If it bleeds you can kill it but it can also kill you. And everything on this planet bleeds.


[00:31:39] – Laura

Okay I was just about ask if ze [Cameron: so we’re-] trees bleed.


[00:31:41] – Cameron

So we’re shooting all the plants?


[00:31:44] – Nick

You don’t- except for the ones you don’t want to make angry. That tree had it coming.


[00:31:49] – Laura

I’m going to stand in ze middle.


[00:31:52] – Nick

So this is why I’m along. I was born and raised here on Unroola Dawn.


[00:31:56] – Cameron

I am finding myself more and more greatful that you’re here Mills.


[00:32:01] – Nick

Me too. He looks confused for a second and then goes back to surveying the scenery. Well you’re on this mission to try and find these deserters so get to finding. And he sets up like a cover position on a tree stump and starts scanning the edges of the perimeter.


[00:32:18] – Laura



[00:32:20] Cameron

[overlapping Laura] I do a perception check [Laura: yeah].


[00:32:21] – Nick

Perception checks would be good. Survival [Laura: Perception checks?] would be [Steven: i was going to roll- ]better overall


[00:32:24] – Steven

-a survival.


[00:32:25] – Cameron

Okay. [Whispers] you roll a survival [Laura: I don’t have survival]


[00:32:26] – Steven

[Whispers] How hard is it to survival?


[00:32:27] – Laura

I can roll survival though


[00:32:28] – Hudson

I’m doing perception.


[00:32:30] – Steven

How hard is the survival mister master?


[00:32:34] – Laura

I’ll do perception


[00:32:34] – Nick

-uhhhh- average.


[00:32:36] – Laura

It’s not dark or anything, is it?


[00:32:38] – Nick



[00:32:38] – Laura



[00:32:39] – Nick

there’s a lot of undergrowth but perception will be hard. [Dice sounds] Survival will be average.  So that’s three purples.


[00:32:46] – Hudson

So three successes, two threats [dice sounds]


[00:32:47] – Steven

That’s two successes and a threat


[00:32:51] – Laura



[00:32:51] – Cameron

That was a survival, yeah?


[00:32:55] – Steven



[00:32:55] – Laura



[00:32:57] – Cameron

Alright here comes my perception roll. [dice sounds]


[00:33:00] – Laura

Okay so I [Cameron: he got a ?-hard to hear-?] rolled a perception and it’s definitely a Cam-roll. It’s a triumph with the success cancelled out and a threat.


[00:33:10] – Nick

  1. [Dice sounds]


[00:33:13] – Cameron



[00:33:13] – Hudson

Then I have-


[00:33:13] – Nick

[overlapping Hudson] any threats or anything?


[00:33:15] – Cameron

Nope, just failures.


[00:33:15] – Nick

Total wash- or just failures


[00:33:17] – Hudson

I had two successes and two threats.


[00:33:20] – Nick

Okay so with the successful survival check by Sabos you find a trail through some- they look like palms except when you look on the underside there’s a bunch of teeth hanging down but they’re kind of bent back and broken and there’s a tree with a blaster mark in it that doesn’t look like a ricochet it looks like someone shot this tree and you see a little trail of like footsteps with a little bit of blood leading off at about a 45 degree angle to the left like more west than the way you were driving but still the same general direction you guys were going. With the successful perception check Tink you see the same thing. [guitar music in background] So you and Sabos are standing on the edge of the clearing. Pointing like “ok yeah I see this” and he’s able to chime in with his survival skills of “you can tell from here that they were hurt because they’re bleeding


[00:34:08] – Cameron



[00:34:10] – Nick

And then [Hudson: didn’t pick up on that]


[00:34:11] – Laura

-uh-hu- yeah


[00:34:13] – Nick

-all of those threats kick in right about now. And you hear a horrific screeching noise and a bunch of what looked like monkeys drop out of the trees straight down onto you. You look at about four of them and what they look like is capuchin monkeys but with no legs or arms or tails. And on that- where their tail would be is a like a hooked kind of crab claw looking thing and on their tummies are whole bunches of like millipedes legs. But you don’t get to see a very good look at that because they’re dropping towards your faces. And this is where Xianna’s triumph kicks in that she happens to be looking up because she’s looking around it’s like I don’t see shit and-


[00:34:53] – Laura

that is not why I’m here. I am here to steal things, the bounty hunter and survivalist person can look at trees.


[00:35:00] – Nick

Yeah. And so you’re looking up tapping your foot and you see these things drop out of the sky. So you get a shot before a vigilance roll.


[00:35:06] – Laura

Oh shit yeah I’m gonna pull out my gun and shoot them. I also my gun has quickdraw in it so


[00:35:15] – Nick

Nice, the gun has quick draw?


[00:35:16] – Laura

Filed frontsight gives you the innate talent of quickdraw but it does increase the difficulty of checks beyond short.


[00:35:25] – Nick



[00:35:26] – Laura

So umm


[00:35:27] – Nick

Their medium.


[00:35:28] – Laura

Their medium? okay. So that’s an-


[00:35:29] – Nick



[00:35:30] – Laura

by one.


[00:35:31] – Nick

It doesn’t  upgrade it increases? So would that make it a hard shot?


[00:35:34] – Laura

Increases difficulty of checks beyond short range by 1.


[00:35:38] – Nick

So you get a shot off while they’re still at range and then you also get to roll initiative so you might get another shot off before they actually land.


[00:35:45] – Laura

And I shoot.


[00:35:45] – Hudson

So is our first battle going to be four monkeys?


[00:35:47] – Nick



[00:35:49] – Hudson

That’s great.


[00:35:50] – Nick

Hey man don’t- don’t shit all over my encounters.


[00:35:53] – Hudson

No! I’m saying it’s great.


[00:35:53] – Steven

[overlapping Hudson] and they’re pretty tasty.


[00:35:55] – Nick

Good connection.


[00:35:58] – Laura

[Whispers]now hold on. [Regular volume] So that goes away. And then- So one failure three advantages.


[00:36:04] – Nick

Okay so you miss. How would you like to spend those advantages? You can give people blue die. You can change the environment.


[00:36:13] – Laura

I’m gonna give whoever shoots next an advantage or a blue die just by the fact that me shooting them let’s everyone know where they are.


[00:36:23] – Nick

Yeah I think that’s fair.


[00:36:26] – Cameron

[whispers] and you say oh shit!


[00:36:27] – Laura

I do yell like oh shit!


[00:36:29] – Nick

So I need you all to roll vigilance for me please.


[00:36:34] – Steven

Oh wonderful. [dice sounds] [muttering]


[00:36:40] – Cameron

Two advantages for karma.


[00:36:41] – Hudson

One advantage.


[00:36:42] – Laura

Two successes and one advantage.


[00:36:45] – Steven

Two advantages.


[00:36:47] – Nick

Wow ya’ll are really bad. Could you roll me a yellow and a green for Mills please?


[00:36:53] – Cameron

A triumph and a succ- two success and a triumph.


[00:36:56] – Nick

Okay so Mills is going to go first.


[00:36:59] – Steven

Triumphs don’t include successes


[00:36:59] – Cameron

Yes they do. A triumph includes [Steven: They do?] a success


[00:37:04] – Steven

Oh but not an advantage?


[00:37:05] – Cameron

Not an advantage.


[00:37:05] – Steven



[00:37:06] – Cameron

Cause a Triumph is the better advantage.


[00:37:08] – Steven



[00:37:10] – Cameron



[00:37:10] – Nick

If you could go ahead and roll me… his shooting is two greens and a yellow. [dice sounds] And it’s an average check but he gets a blue die for reasons. [dice sounds]


[00:37:24] – Cameron

that is…. 5 advantages. [Multiple speakers: OOhh]


[00:37:30] – Hudson

Was that blue die from Laura or for other reasons?


[00:37:32] – Nick

No. the blue- [Cameron: other reasons] I didn’t take the blue die. The blue guy so he hears oh shit and immediately action rolls and lands in the middle and points up and starts shooting, sees that he’s not going to be able to move his arms fast enough but he’s so comfortable with the jungle and having been raised there his whole life, he immediately shoots down in a circle around him and you realize his blaster is a fully automatic modified rifle and so he shoots -chhh-chh-chh-chh- and it sprays a whole bunch of dead leaves and stuff into the air and makes like a weird smokey screen thing where anything that might be trying to land on you wouldn’t be able to see as well. So he’s going to spend all of his advantages that the first round any attack that they do is going to have a black die and there’s four of them and four of y’all. So that’s pretty good. So that was Mills, being awesome and he spits to the side and says I hate bug monkeys.


[00:38:25] – Cameron

Oh, these are the cute things? Whattt?


[00:38:28] – Laura

Zese are not cute.


[00:38:28] – Nick

And it’s the next person’s turn.


[00:38:32] – Laura

I had two successes and an advantage. Karma should use that first PC slot.


[00:38:37] – Nick

OK so one PC slot.


[00:38:40] – Cameron

Are they still at medium?


[00:38:41] – Nick

Uh, by now they’re at short range.


[00:38:43] – Cameron



[00:38:43] – Nick

So they’re probably like 5 or 6 feet above your head at this point.


[00:38:47] – Cameron

I’mma shoot them.


[00:38:47] – Laura

Shoot ’em real good.


[00:38:49] – Nick



[00:38:50] – Cameron

With my blaster. I’m going take the blue die.


[00:38:51] – Laura



[00:38:53] – Cameron

From Xianna [dice sounds]


[00:38:53] – Nick

Do you want to aim? Could use a maneuver to aim.


[00:38:56] – Cameron

[overlapping Nick] Oh hey- I’ll use a maneuver to aim.


[00:38:57] – Nick

What a great idea! [Cameron: another blue die] Let’s use the game.


[00:39:01] – Cameron

[dice sounds] Oh right, we’re plaing a game.  Two successes two advantages.


[00:39:06] – Nick

Okay how much damage is that?


[00:39:09] – Cameron

So that is 11 damage. I want to- so I shoot one of the bug monkeys. 11 damage. For my advantages I want to shoot that monkey into one of its friends to knock it off course so it doesn’t land on someone.


[00:39:25] – Nick

OK it will have a black die on it’s attack [Cameron: yeah] but it’s because it’s corpse fell into it. So the bolt- you’re using military grade hardware here so it basically turns into a donut of a bug monkey and the shrapnel spins into another one and you heara -eeep-. And then it continues to fall in bullet time and looks like it’s 4 now 3 times NPC slots. So the first one is going to fall directly onto Sabos’s face and I need- Do you have defense of any kind.


[00:39:58] – Steven



[00:39:59] – Nick

All right. Can you roll me an average difficulty two green die?


[00:40:05] – Steven



[00:40:06] – Nick

With a black die because it can’t see very good [Dice sounds]


[00:40:11] – Cameron

A failure and 3 advantages.


[00:40:13] – Nick

Okay it will give the advantage- it’ll use the advantages they have some sort of weird sonar thing going on. So it misses but it begins chittering to one of its friends who is also landing right now on Tink’s face. Tink, do you have any defense or anything?


[00:40:28] – Hudson

Mine shows blank so I don’t think so. I don’t know if I ever calculated-


[00:40:32] – Laura

You don’t. No because you have no armor or anything.


[00:40:35] – Nick

Okay so the same thing but with a black die but also a blue die. [dice sounds]


[00:40:43] – Cameron

Failure, three advantages.


[00:40:45] – Nick

Okay well it’s going to use those three advantages to super boost the last one that is falling straight for Xianna. It’s the one that she missed the first time. And it’s also the one that got hit with the shrapnel, so it’s black die but two blue die.


[00:41:01] – Cameron

Okay [dice sounds] four failures and an advantage.


[00:41:08] – Nick

Wow these things suck.


[00:41:10] – Cameron

I roll so well. This is great.


[00:41:13] – Nick

Next time Hudson’s rolling for the bad guys.


[00:41:14] – Laura

Xianna is also yelling like no not my face!


[00:41:18] – Nick

So it comes flying down. The advantage is that you flinch away because these things are kind of gross looking. You flinch away, it lands to the ground but you’re kind of off balance for if you try to shoot it so you’ll have a black die on your next attack. But it looks up at you and bares its teeth and hisses -hisssss- and it has those same giant red bug eyes where you would expect cute little monkey eyes to be.


[00:41:41] – Laura



[00:41:41] – Nick

And it’s tail has that like lobster claw thing on and in a click Satchu a little bit. And now there are 3 more PC slots. So who would like to go next. These things are now on the ground. One bounced off her Sabos without really doing much one bounced off a Tink and the other one just went -eehhheeee- -bomp- also threw away from the Xianna. Okay so Sabos is going to try and shoot one of these things.


[00:42:06] – Steven



[00:42:07] – Nick

Does the full rifle have any negatives for close range? So this thing is engaged with you because it well- not engaged [Cameron and Laura: awwwwwww] like you’re going to get married.


[00:42:16] – Laura

Tell us- how did it propose?


[00:42:18] – Steven

It did. It dropped out of the sky on my face.


[00:42:20] – Laura

Aww. It dropped down on one knee and presented a ring.


[00:42:24] – Nick

So it is-


[00:42:25] – Cameron

Of teeth.


[00:42:26] – Laura

With a beautiful jewel of Yavin on it.


[00:42:28] – Nick

It is at Engaged range and that means because you have your big giant rifle that it is plus two difficulties. So instead of an easy check it’s a hard check.


[00:42:38] – Steven



[00:42:38] – Nick

Yeah. Shoot that thing or you could try to shoot one across the place from you and it would only be those are in medium range across the clearing. That’s the word I was trying to use but that means the one that tried to kill you-


[00:42:50] – Steven

[overlapping Nick] Nah, I’ll shoot the one lclose to me.


[00:42:50] – Nick

Yeah, that’s probably a good idea. [dice sounds]


[00:42:52] – Cameron

You wanna flip a lightside point?


[00:42:54] – Steven

Yeah, can I upgrade one of my die?


[00:42:59] – Nick

Oooohh. Fancy. [dice sounds] [group laughter]


[00:43:05] – Steven

Well there’s a failure and… advantage.


[00:43:07] – Nick

So you miss, this thing hisses at you. How would you like to spend your advantage?


[00:43:11] – Steven

It is pissed off at someone else.


[00:43:15] – Nick

I think that would take more than one advantage.


[00:43:17] – Cameron

You can give the next person a blue die.


[00:43:19] – Laura



[00:43:19] – Steven

Yeah let’s do that.


[00:43:20] – Laura



[00:43:21] – Steven

Or just like it slips in the leaves and shit.


[00:43:23] – Nick

I like that it slips in the leaves. You could give it a black die for that.


[00:43:26] – Steven



[00:43:27] – Nick

So yeah it’s a little dazed. It’ll be harder to hit you.


[00:43:30] – Cameron

Your shot fires up some leaves and they land on top of it.


[00:43:34] – Steven

That’ll work.


[00:43:34] – Cameron

So now it has to dig its way out.


[00:43:36] – Nick

It’s covered in the leaves you just see the pincer claw come up and then it’s like the old vampire myth. It’s picking up one leaf at a time to set it aside.


[00:43:43] – Laura

Oh, it’s got to count all the leaves now.


[00:43:46] – Nick

All right. And onto whoever’s going next.


[00:43:48] – Hudson

I want to go next because I have a vibro-axe, so I was built for this type of battle.


[00:43:52] – Nick

Oh yeah ok.


[00:43:53] – Cameron

Against tiny monkeys.


[00:43:54] – Hudson

Against tiny monkeys. So what- the one that landed me, where is that- is that one….


[00:43:58] – Nick

It’s just like in the grass next to you scuttling around and hissing.


[00:44:01] – Hudson

I just try to go -wack- and hit it with my vibro-axe.


[00:44:05] – Nick

Makes sense. Your difficulty will be two purples. [dice sounds]


[00:44:13] – Hudson

Oh, wait, [Cameron: nice] a success. And…


[00:44:16] – Cameron



[00:44:17] – Laura

Just a-


[00:44:17] – Cameron

Just a success.


[00:44:18] – Hudson

Just a success. Okay.



Okay. How much damage does your vibro-axe do?


[00:44:21] – Hudson

It does Brawn plus 3 and my brawn is 3 so 6.


[00:44:25] – Nick

  1. So you-


[00:44:25] – Hudson

Crit two.


[00:44:27] – Nick

Well you-


[00:44:27] – Laura

[overlapping Nick] you don’t have any.


[00:44:27] – Nick

But no, that’s good to [Hudson: I’m just letting you know] know. Thank you. I appreciate that, you cut it cleanly in half and the two halves fall to the ground and skitter off in several directions and then fall down and finished dying.


[00:44:38] – Hudson

Ahh [Nick makes hissing noises] didn’t know they worked like that. That’s that’s an interesting to know.


[00:44:45] – Cameron

Question, on melee do you add the number of successes to your damage?


[00:44:48] – Nick



[00:44:48] – Cameron

As well. Okay. So it’s actually one more damage than that.


[00:44:52] – Nick

Okay so that leaves Xianna left.


[00:44:55] – Laura

Yeah I’m going to aim at the one in front of me and then shoot it.


[00:45:00] – Nick



[00:45:01] – Laura

Would it be short range by now?


[00:45:02] – Nick



[00:45:03] – Laura



[00:45:05] – Nick

It missed, so it’s not engaged with you but it is short range.


[00:45:09] – Laura

Uhh- What is short range? Average?


[00:45:11] – Cameron

Two, yeah.


[00:45:13] – Laura

And then… where is my shooting? [dice sounds] That would be 5 successes and 1 threat.


[00:45:25] – Nick

Wow. So that does what, like 11 damage?


[00:45:29] – Laura

Uhh- 6… Yes. 11.


[00:45:32] – Nick

Dang I’m good. Yeah it explodes in a puff of like purply venom with a small monkey -eep-.


[00:45:40] – Laura



[00:45:40] – Nick

Yeah. There’s like a smoking- like one little stream of smoke out of a crater from where the monkey used to be. It is gone. You shot it real good. And now we’re back to the top. Mills looks around and says I’ll make sure there’s not more of them. And he goes like running off into the jungle.


[00:46:00] – Laura

Nooo Where you’re going? They’re still in here. And Xianna’s like pointing like at the claw like what? nooo.


[00:46:07] – Nick

And he – you hear a tree creaking, like shut up tree -pew pew- and then goes running off. And that guns to a PC slot.


[00:46:15] – Steven



[00:46:17] – Nick

  1. That’s the one by you. You gonna shoot him?


[00:46:20] – Steven

I’m going to try to stab it with my vibrokinfe.


[00:46:22] – Nick

  1. I’m so excited. So the [Cameron: so that’s melee, so melee is-] difficulty is two.


[00:46:27] – Cameron

-always two.


[00:46:28] – Nick

Thank you, Rules Expert.


[00:46:30] – Cameron

You’re welcome.


[00:46:31] – Steven

Should I upgrade? I don’t know. [dice sounds] out of


[00:46:37] – Cameron

You should have upgraded.


[00:46:39] – Steven

So it’s a failure, two advantages [Cameron: two advantages] yeah.


[00:46:44] – Nick

I like this monkey thing, so how would you like to spend your two advantages?


[00:46:47] – Steven

It’s buried again.


[00:46:49] – Nick

  1. It’s more under the dirt. So it’s going to-


[00:46:53] – Steven

It’s really buried.


[00:46:54] – Nick

It’s going to spend its manouver digging itself out of the dirt I guess it’ll still have a black die and it’s going to attack you, Sabos, and it is…  two greens.


[00:47:06] – Cameron

[overlapping Nick] Alright, Hudson you have to roll this time for the monkey.


[00:47:08] – Hudson

Opp- you’re right. [whispers] What do I roll?


[00:47:09] – Nick

Yeah. Two greens and two purples with one black die. [dice sounds]


[00:47:17] – Hudson

One success two threats.


[00:47:20] – Nick

Yayyyy! [Steven: aw] good job bug monkey.


[00:47:21] – Hudson

3 blank die rolls.


[00:47:21] – Nick

Geeze. That’s weird. Okay you said one success and two-


[00:47:27] – Cameron

Two threats.


[00:47:27] – Nick

Two threats. So here’s what happens. It finally jumps up out of this- You see from where it jumps. It’s actually in like a two foot hole at this point because you keep bearing it further and it latches onto your chest and it opens its mouth and it does that really creepy unfolding thing and some mandibles come out and sink into your chest. And it does, with one success, seven damage.


[00:47:50] – Steven

Oh, of course.


[00:47:51] – Cameron

So hits your soak. So you take 3 wounds.


[00:47:55] – Nick

And it’s super excited and it makes happy gloating monkey noises, you all see this thing latch on to Sabos and stab him with its weird monkey bug mouth.


[00:48:04] – Laura

AH! Zat is not good!


[00:48:06] – Hudson



[00:48:06] – Nick

And so while its head is sunk into the chest, the claw tail is snipping at all of you. -click click click-. Who’s next?


[00:48:14] – Cameron

[overlapping Nick] So next is a PC slot?


[00:48:16] – Nick

Yup, PC slot.


[00:48:17] – Cameron

Okay. So Karma looks at Sabos and then looks down at her gun and then is like well all right let’s do this [group laughter] and aims her blaster carbine at his face.


[00:48:30] – Nick

Okay. Which is especially interesting since it’s on his chest.


[00:48:34] – Steven

Because a knife wouldn’t work.


[00:48:35] – Nick

She’s like it would be a mercy to put him down.


[00:48:38] – Cameron

I’m aiming at the monkey. Xianna’s looking at Karma look down at her gun, And then Xianna also looks over at Sabos. And is like ohhhnoooo.


[00:48:52] – Cameron

Okay. So there’s no blue dice left or anything right? I’m sure you’ll be fine.


[00:48:56] – Steven



[00:48:58] – Cameron

I am going to upgrade it so that I have less of a chance… of shooting you.


[00:49:03] – Steven

Yup. [Cameron: on accident] [dice sounds]


[00:49:07] – Cameron

I’m sure it’ll be fine. See? Look you’re fine. Uh one success. [group laughter]


[00:49:13] – Nick

Oh that was close. So close.


[00:49:15] – Laura

Yeah one success.


[00:49:17] – Nick



[00:49:17] – Cameron

So that’s 10 damage to the monkey.


[00:49:20] – Nick

OK so you shoot him shoot the monkey in the back of the head and it splatters its guts on to Sabos’s chest and falls to the ground. The force transfers into you a little bit. It knocks you back, it feels like you got punched by somebody who wasn’t trying to hurt you too bad but it was real scary. And the monkey is now dead at your feet. The bug monkey. That’s the races name, bug monkey. And by race I mean animal species. Because this is not a sentient creature


[00:49:49] – Cameron

From Sabos’s point of view you just saw me look at you look at my gun and kind of shrug and just raise my gun and point it at you no biggie.


[00:49:59] – Steven

Yup, yup.


[00:50:01] – Cameron

So you feel loved.


[00:50:03] – Steven

I appreciate you getting the monkey off me.


[00:50:07] – Cameron

You’re welcome. You should try shooting it next time.


[00:50:09] – Steven

I- -hmmhmm-


[00:50:13] – Hudson

Missed the opportunity to say you got a monkey on your front, instead of on your back. That wouldn’t have been a good joke. [Laura laughs]


[00:50:20] – Nick



[00:50:20] – Laura

Is okay.


[00:50:21] – Nick

Sabo is standing there and he’s got a big purple splotch on his chest. And as you’re watching you see some red kind of seep out of two pretty good sized holes in his chest.


[00:50:32] – Laura

Do you ‘ave medical supplies for yourself?


[00:50:36] – Steven



[00:50:36] – Laura

-sighs- dummie. You owe me. And like from- she like rummages around her pockets until she finds a stim pack and like walks up and just like jabs it into his throat and you heal five wounds.


[00:50:55] – Steven

That should do it.


[00:50:56] – Nick

So the stem packs are just like pocket morphine and adrenaline so it doesn’t- the bleeding kind of stops because they have stuff for that but there’s still some holes in your chest you’re able to manage but you feel great.


[00:51:09] – Laura

Well you- you heal five wounds then four then three then two than one then they don’t work.


[00:51:13] – Nick

Yeah they become less useful but so yayy drugs, you’re able to kind of shrug it off. Mills comes charging back into the clearing and he’s got like seven more of those monkey things in various states of exploded held by the tail. And he’s like here I got the rest of them they were trying to make an ambush. These things are wily suckers. And he says so if we scatter these around the clearing. We’ve been driving for not that long but I think we probably need to set up so we can- we can plan from here. And he sets about scattering all the monkey guts around the clearing that’ll keep the trees from coming after us for a while.


[00:51:54] – Steven

I don’t believe the trees. How do they move?


[00:51:57] – Cameron

Are the trees going to go after the monkeys instead?


[00:51:59] – Nick

No they just don’t like the smell and it’ll keep the other monkeys away.


[00:52:03] – Cameron

[whispers] the trees don’t like the smell?


[00:52:04] – Laura

Xianna is so concerned at this point. She’s like ze trees? What is zis planet? What are we doing on here?


[00:52:10] – Nick

Oh I forgot to mention Mills has a headband tied around his forehead like a red long one. And like jungle cammo paint on his face which he did not have two minutes ago and he’s I’ve seen some things in the jungle. So let’s- let’s make camp here for just a minute, come up with a plan. It looks like you guys saw something and then we’ll move on and


[00:52:31] – Cameron



[00:52:32] – Nick

And that’s where we’ll end this week’s episode.


[00:52:37] – Nick



[00:52:37] – Multiple Speakers



[00:52:41] – Steven

Just like half a step off.



Thanks for listening to Tabletop Squadron. If you enjoyed our show please consider logging into iTunes and giving us a five star review. Five star reviews will help new listeners to find the show.



Xianna’fan is played by Laura Penrod. She can be found on Twitter at Cheerio_buffet.



Tink is played by Hudson Jameson and he can be found on Twitter at HudsonJameson.



Karma Nailo is played by me, Cameron Robertson. You can find me on Twitter at MidnightMusic13.



Sabos Niks was played by Steven Schroeder. He does not exist on the internet.



Our game master is Nick Robertson and you can find him on Twitter at alias58. Our intro song is Space Jam by Pablo Ribot. Additional music by James Gunter.



Follow the podcast on Twitter and Instagram at tabletop_squad. For real we’re real people and we want to talk to anyone who listens to the show. Reach out. See you next time.





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Thanks for listening and may the Force be with you,

Laura, Tabletop One

Tabletop Squadron

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